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Male and Female

post #1 of 6
Thread Starter 
No, this is really family-friendly!

If you have studied another language, esp. a romance language like Spanish or French, you have no doubt noticed that some words are considered masculine and others are feminine. It seems pretty arbitrary, but often there's a logic behind it. There are traces of it in English, like the way boats are "she" - men think they can control a boat but in the end it often behaves in ways they can't predict for reasons they don't understand. A friend of mine sent this list to me, of a contest to assisgn gender to English words:

Male And Female

From the Invitation, in which it was postulated that English should have male and female nouns, and readers were asked to assign a gender to nouns of their choice and explain their reason. The best submissions:

SWISS ARMY KNIFE: Male, because even though it appears useful for a wide variety of work, it spends most of its time just opening bottles.

KIDNEYS: Female, because they always go to the bathroom in pairs.

TIRE: Male, because it goes bald and often is over-inflated.

HOT AIR BALLOON: Male, because to get it to go anywhere you have to light a fire under it. . . and, of course, there's the hot air part.

SPONGES: Female, because they are soft and squeezable and retain water.

WEB PAGE: Female, because it is always getting hit on.

SHOE: Male, because it is usually unpolished, with its tongue hanging out.

COPIER: Female, because once turned off, it takes a while to warm up. Because it is an effective reproductive device when the right buttons are pushed. Because it can wreak havoc when the wrong buttons are pushed.

ZIPLOC BAGS: Male, because they hold everything in, but you can always see right through them.

SUBWAY: Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.

HOURGLASS: Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.

HAMMER: Male, because it hasn't evolved much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.

REMOTE CONTROL: Female. . . Ha!. . . you thought I'd say male. But consider, it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying.
post #2 of 6
LOL! Those are great. I've heard some of those before, but there were some new ones in there I haven't seen before.
post #3 of 6
funny - thanks for the giggle!
post #4 of 6
post #5 of 6
Those are great! We should try to think of some and post them. Just make a list and let every one try to come up with the reasoning. Too bad Bodlover has a migraine!
post #6 of 6
Loved those!!! :LOL:
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