For the teachers among us...

... though others will enjoy it, too. I've seen a number of similar things, but not this one and not nearly as extensive. Get ready to groan

Wow, that was a combination of a LOT of really bad papers! Very entertaining, in a painful way! LOL!

Though I'm not a teacher, I have done some corporate training.

At any rate, anyone with an appreciation for proper grammar, correct spelling and factual information may find "Life Reeked with Joy" quite the entertaining read.

I have a book chock full of these kinds of bloopers! I'm not a teacher, though I have worked as a classroom assisstant before now - and you also hear some really really ridiculous things from the kiddies (especially the really litle ones, of course) but you can't laugh in front of them... it's the kind of thing you have to write down and then take home and share Wondeful!

There is a complete lack of English knowledge... ranging from spelling, to grammar, to well... I'm not sure what some of them were thinking, if at all!! But you know what it's like in an exam situation! I do love the bit about people catching bubonic plague from inflected rats and growing boobs on their necks!! "Inflected" men would have had a field day, perpendicular or not!!!

Hrmn... it's obviously not "sheik" to be educated these days though......

http://www.butlerwebs.com/jokes/kids.htm

This is the kind of thing I had to listen to in a day!!

That's a neat link, too, Emma!

I wonder what "Catholic coiffures" are like? I mean, perhaps "...a simple cut, leave the sides, trim the tonsure, buff my pate," perhaps ?

hehehehe I used to love these things - my mum was working in a class where their teacher was trying to teach the kids about antiques and their value because they're old. Well, after a few days of this project, one of the kids sidled up to the teacher and said "Miss. XYZ, you're precious." She coudln't help but smile.... right up until kiddo followed it up with the line "...because you're old"!!

Thanks for the laughs, Fran. That link is definitely going to be emailed to my colleagues!

Thought you might get a charge out of it, Tricia!

What really gets me is that the people who wrote such rubbish were presumably native speakers of English, for the most part, and Canada scored very high in the OECD's PISA test. If my students wrote such stuff, I'd presuppose that language was a big part of the problem, since almost all of them speak English as a second or third language.
That reminds me of my cousin's daughter, who asked if she could come visit us. I said sure, but try for a minimum of three weeks, because Germany is so far away. She, a native of Pennsylvania, and a high school student at the time, replied, "I thought it was on the other side of New Jersey?"

Oh, dear...

oooh dear!

That reminds me of a little girl who used to write to her two aunties - living on a dairy farm some way from her home - and every time she did she used to ask how the cows were too! Unfortunately one day she just happened to miss a letter, and wrote "I hope you cows are alright!" (don't ask me why the cows came to mind... they just did)

I also saw, in my own high school class, one boy asked to put a pin in a map to show where canada was. He put the pin in Russia.

Oh, well, right hemisphere

There's that. I was working on a translation of an article from a "quality newspaper" with one of my classes recently, and the article put China in the southern hemisphere!