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Write to Santa Here

post #1 of 17
Thread Starter 
Write your own letter to Santa. This is funny!

http://members.aol.com/frogiearno/dearsanta.htm
post #2 of 17


That's GREAT!! I'm definitely forwarding that to my friends, they're going to love it!
post #3 of 17
Thread Starter 
This was my letter:

Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth


Dear Santa,

I have been a good girl.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at Kathleen's Office party. It was Angie who spiked the punch with too much Diet Pepsi. I can't help it if I drank 3 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like orange.

I thought it was funny when I put Tiffany's jeans on my head and danced the cha-cha on the sofa while singing `Hail to the Chief'. I didn't mean to break Kathleen's computer and don't know why Kathleen would accuse me of murder.

I don't remember calling Pete's wife a small cow---even though she looked like one with blue eye shadow and teal lipstick!

And when I threw up on melanie's husband's leg, it was only because I ate too much of that steak.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Lexus through my neighbor's bedroom. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a beautiful cat and have me arrested for theft!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all gross and bubbley. And I'm really not to blame for any of this bloody stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and frightfully yours,
Tammie (Really a nice girl!)

P.S. It's only 6 bucks!
post #4 of 17
That's hysterical!
post #5 of 17
Too funny!!!
Here's my letter!

Dear Santa,

I have been a good girl.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at Scotty's Office party. It was Safari who spiked the punch with too much skim milk. I can't help it if I drank 14 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like peepee.

I thought it was funny when I put Mom's underpants on my head and danced the funky chicken on the widescreen TV while singing `"Don't You Want Me Baby?"'. I didn't mean to break Scotty's shower radio and don't know why Scotty would accuse me of murder.

I don't remember calling Brian's wife a smelly piggy---even though she looked like one with yellow eye shadow and purple lipstick!

And when I threw up on Sherri's husband's boob, it was only because I ate too much of that bananas.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Durango through my neighbor's bathroom. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a frumpy kitty and have me arrested for robbery!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all bumpy and smelly. And I'm really not to blame for any of this pinkish stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and spastically yours,
Wendy (Really a nice girl!)

P.S. It's only 47 bucks!
post #6 of 17
Thread Starter 
Wow at least your bail is cheaper!

Opps.... I meant my bail is cheaper.
post #7 of 17
That's funny, but I'm not posting what I wrote! too naughty!
post #8 of 17
Ok, I'm filling it out but...what's an adjective and an adverb??
It's been too many years since school!!
post #9 of 17
Oh that is hysterical! Here is my favorite line from mine:

'I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a squishy turtle and have me arrested for speeding!'

ok I changed my mind, I want to share my whole thing! I think my bail is the most so far....

Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth


Dear Santa,

I have been a good Girl.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at Nathan's Office party. It was Nathan who spiked the punch with too much strawberry daquri. I can't help it if I drank 8 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like rum.

I thought it was funny when I put Nathan's socks on my head and danced the tango on the chari while singing `All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth'. I didn't mean to break Nathan's radio and don't know why Nathan would accuse me of catnaping.

I don't remember calling Nathan's wife a soft pigglet---even though she looked like one with red eye shadow and blue lipstick!

And when I threw up on Leighann's husband's toe, it was only because I ate too much of that cherry.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my mazda through my neighbor's ROOF. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a squishy turtle and have me arrested for speeding!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all hard and rough. And I'm really not to blame for any of this bumpy stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and was yours,
Leighann (Really a nice Girl!)

P.S. It's only 8000 bucks!



Oh and by the way, I only used my own husband's name and my own name, therefore I threw up on my own husband and called myself a pigglet!
post #10 of 17
That is quite funny!
post #11 of 17
Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth


Dear Santa,

I have been a good Girl.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at Dana's Office party. It was Ashley who spiked the punch with too much Pepsi. I can't help it if I drank 3 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like Fruity.

I thought it was funny when I put Teri's Pants on my head and danced the Salsa on the Bed while singing `Keeper Of The Stars'. I didn't mean to break Dana's Laptop and don't know why Dana would accuse me of Theft.

I don't remember calling Gary's wife a Dark Horse---even though she looked like one with Red eye shadow and Pink lipstick!

And when I threw up on Teri's husband's Head, it was only because I ate too much of that Ham.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Blazer through my neighbor's Kitchen. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a Angry Cat and have me arrested for Murder!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all Sad and Happy. And I'm really not to blame for any of this Silly stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and darkly yours,
Kim (Really a nice Girl!)

P.S. It's only 5 bucks!
post #12 of 17
Heres mine!
Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth


Dear Santa,

I have been a good girl.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at beth's Office party. It was joshua who spiked the punch with too much pepsi. I can't help it if I drank 9 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like cat pee.

I thought it was funny when I put jason's underwear on my head and danced the waltz on the table while singing `stairway to heaven'. I didn't mean to break beth's computer and don't know why beth would accuse me of DUI.

I don't remember calling beth's wife a purple pig---even though she looked like one with green eye shadow and red lipstick!

And when I threw up on sherba's husband's ass, it was only because I ate too much of that sandwich.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my truck through my neighbor's bedroom. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a stinky horse and have me arrested for burgerly!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all stupid and ugly. And I'm really not to blame for any of this fat stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and simply yours,
cindy (Really a nice girl!)

P.S. It's only 3 bucks!
post #13 of 17
Ok it's not working for me... what's the trick??
post #14 of 17
It didn't work for me, either.
post #15 of 17
Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth


Dear Santa,

I have been a good Girl.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at Vicky's Office party. It was Fran who spiked the punch with too much blue lagoon. I can't help it if I drank 12 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like Echo.

I thought it was funny when I put Sarah's shoe on my head and danced the Macarena on the sofa while singing `More than words'. I didn't mean to break Vicky's toaster and don't know why Vicky would accuse me of theft.

I don't remember calling Mr X's wife a grumpy horse---even though she looked like one with green eye shadow and purple lipstick!

And when I threw up on Mrs Y's husband's leg, it was only because I ate too much of that lasagne.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my car through my neighbor's window. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a silly pig and have me arrested for breaking and entering!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all sexy and drunk. And I'm really not to blame for any of this cheap stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and maybe yours,
Emma (Really a nice Girl!)

P.S. It's only 4 bucks!





I can't believe mine actually made sense!!! love it!!
post #16 of 17
I think for it to work you have to use internet explorer because on my morzilla doesnt work!
post #17 of 17
That was fun! Here's mine:

Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth

Dear Santa,\t*
I have been a good girl.

It really wasn't my fault what happened at Christine 's Office party. It was Andrea who spiked the punch with too much Fuzzy Navel. I can't help it if I drank 14 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like lavender.

I thought it was funny when I put Don's sock on my head and danced the waltz on the recliner while singing `Have a Holly, Jolly Christmas'. I didn't mean to break Christine 's DVD player and don't know why Christine would accuse me of vandalism .

I don't remember calling Rick 's wife a shiny rooster---even though she looked like one with green eye shadow and blue lipstick!

And when I threw up on Beth 's husband's big toe, it was only because I ate too much of that eggs.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my hummer through my neighbor's chimney . I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a soft cat and have me arrested for breaking and entering !

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all big and happy. And I'm really not to blame for any of this smart stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!
Sincerely and slowly yours,
Eileen (Really a nice girl!)

P.S. It's only 62 bucks!
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