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Hi all! I adopted my beautiful seal point siamese 2 months ago at 8 months old. I don't really know anything about her background except that she had been shifted from a kill shelter to the ASPCA where I got her. I believe she was an indoor cat because her little paw pads are very smooth and soft. She has been spayed. I live alone in NYC in a one room/studio apartment (no putting her in another room - there isn't one!). I am currently looking for a job so Lilly has a lot of my attention right now.

Problem is two-fold. First, she swats with her paws/claws when (most times) she doesn't want to be petted. She will also bite. She won't let me hold her for longer than 10 - 20 seconds before she starts biting. She has never sat on my lap :-( She seems very wary of hands and hates it if I pat her and she doesn't see it comeing. If I approach her when she is lying down and talk sweetly to her, she looks from left to right to see where my hands are even if I am not trying to pat her. I have a theory that in her previous home there was someone perhaps a child who rough housed with her so she couldn't learn to trust. She will also do aggressive play with me. She has bit my face 3 times while I was in bed (ouch).

The other issue is that when I am phone Lily will zoom right over and start gnawing on me - hands, arms, hair/scalp, face. This is painful and annoying. I was trying to say "no" evertime she bit me but that is really bothersome and intterupts the conversations. Also, sometimes I need to have a professional conversation on the phone so that really doesn't work! I have been going into my bathroom after she starts her bad phone behavior. I only started doing this so I am not sure if it will work. I can't put HER in the bathroom because most times she won't let me pick her up.

I have been telling Lilly "no!" when she bites/swats me and she is really responding to that. Sometimes I can tell when she is thinking of biting and when I say "Don't do it!" - she doesn't. (She's a smart siamese!) I feel like this approach works well but would like input to see if you all agree that this is the way to go.

With respect to not being able to hold her - I am working to extend slowly the length of time I can hold her - I just started this so I don't know if this will work. Any other suggestions?

The phone behavior is of a different nature though. I can't tell if it's because I am speaking in a louder tone and in a voice (not baby talk) than she is used to. I think it might be some of that but it's also a jealousy thing - I'm paying attention to someone else. When she bites me while I'm on the phone it is a continuous gnawing all up and down my body. Weird and painful! The "no" doesn't work as well in the situations when I'm on the phone. HELP AND SUGGESTIONS ON THIS ARE VERY WELCOME!!!!

Finally, y'all might wonder - why am I even putting up with this. Well, I've told you the bad parts because that's where I need help. I can tell Lilly loves me - she follows me around and sits near me when ever I sit. She sleeps in my bed which I love (except when she bites). She loves to play with me and her felt mousies. She is loving when I feed her so I know she has it in her. She's also always happy to see me when I come home. Also, she is very funny and always amuses me (specially the time she jumped into the shower with me without realizing that there was water involved!).

Basically, I want to help my baby be a happier more relexed girl so she can accept the loving that I believe she really craves.