Oh That Was Hard!!

What an awful, awful woman! I would be very ticked off too. I hope you and Steve can do something for the kids' sakes. That is sad that his own daughter can't even speak to him on the phone.

Steve will have to step up and take control of the situation. It is such a pain to deal with but it has to be done.

Hopefully, this will all eventually work out. I don't know how long you guys have been together or how long they have been split up but in time the animosity begins to go away. It takes ALOT of energy to be so bitter and angry. I have been through this situation and we are finally at a point (it only took 6 years) where I get along with the ex well enough to be able to pick up my fiance's son and things of that nature.

They have been split for a long time Steve has actually been married twice. The second was after the one with children and he admits it was the biggest mistake ever. This wife he says was not a mistake. because he has two lovely children. He loves his children, and he wants them here. His other ex however hated his kids And i think its taking him a little time to get used to me being so willing to go to bat for them. I have since the start. And i told him "I love them like they were my own because they are apart of you" period. No if's ands or buts. I have never given the ex the pleasure of seeing or hearing me mad. Which I think is a good thing for me. She has only ever heard kindness from me.But in the private of my own home when no ones here I can get as mad as I want IMO. I have been the child in this situation. My mom and dad played pawn games with me. and i hated it. So I feel for the kids. I do.

As for how they moved where they are its a long drawn out tail. They are from Evansville, IN are are not in Kentucky. Steve moved here after being on the road as a musician in this area alot. about 6 months ago however, she moved the kids and didnt even tell him, to IL...he finally found out. Than..2 months after that she moved them back to KY and didnt even tell him than either. I have documented all this.

Getting the kids here we know is on us. and we have accepted that and its never been a problem. but she will not ALLOW THEM to come. Because of ME..at least thats what she says. My mom thinks she is jealous, I am younger 22 and steve is 32.

One reason he hadnt mentioned the paperwork to me before (and he openly admits it) is that he does not understand it. He cant understand the legal stuff. So he got them out for me. and I looked over them. She is in contempt of court big time. so i printed everything off and we will be filling it out tonight when he gets home from work. my mom will be the notary (she is one) and shes gonna get a fun paper in the mail..

Originally Posted by WellingtonCats

What are Steves plans with the children at Christmas time, Katie?

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we want them to come here for xmas..but she will not allow it.

No, by law she can't deny her children access to their father. As far as I'm aware she can't, unless she can prove by means of various - and need I say expensive - trips to doctors and child psychiatrists that their having contact is detrimental to the children. Chase it up and she can go back to where she came from.

Father's have just as much right to the children if not more then SOME mothers... not all but SOME
If he has a copy of the visitation order from the court, all he has to do is show up on her front door step w/o notice with a police officer and DEMAND he see his daughter. And she cannot deny him at that time as long as it is on his day(s) to see her. And if she denies him, she can be arrested....Just another FYI.....

well...hes not gonna drive all the way to Indi just to show up on her door step. I dont think hes ever actually been to their new house she always insisted on bringing them to their grandmas.

BUT I just got off the phone with the courts there. they are sending me a second copy of the decree from the judge. and we are filling out the paperwork tonight. It will be express mailed. and served by a sheriff to her royal pain in the booty.

Good! Just make sure that when he does talk to his daughter to not mention any of it to her. It might make her upset and scare her. And further more confuse her because god knows what her mother has said to her about her father.. it's sad that people play games to try to hurt each other but end up only hurting the children in the long run. (no you guys lol)

amen to that my mom used to play those games all the time. and his daughter has already expressed interest in living with us before so we shall see.

Unfortunatly children often become pawns in these cases. I agree that mothers should have custody of young children but older children shoul be able to choose who they live with. Also visitation should be that allowing the non resident parent to see the children, they need their fathers in their life. When the father commits no crime why does he have to lose out?

Originally Posted by Sims2fan

Unfortunatly children often become pawns in these cases. I agree that mothers should have custody of young children but older children shoul be able to choose who they live with. Also visitation should be that allowing the non resident parent to see the children, they need their fathers in their life. When the father commits no crime why does he have to lose out?

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Because the system is biased. Very much so. In most cases I agree the mother should have the children. But not ALL. there have been plenty of cases i have seen that the kids would have been better off with dad.

this is one of them..of course on this issue I am biased.

In a perfect world, joint custody is best. Kids need both of their parents. Going back and forth is really hard on the kids though too. I realized that this summer with my fiances son. We were getting him every other week and it really wore on him.

Originally Posted by squirtle

In a perfect world, joint custody is best. Kids need both of their parents. Going back and forth is really hard on the kids though too. I realized that this summer with my fiances son. We were getting him every other week and it really wore on him.

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It is best if the parents dont play pawn games. My parents always did. I ended up living with my dad. but my mom still played games.

I have to say that in some cases, the system doesnt work. I have seen with my own eyes a child getting verbally, physically and emotionally abused ON CAMERA by the father, and when the mother called CPS, they did NOTHING. Told the father he needed cousiling and never followed up on it. BUT when they came to speak to the mother about the incident, they threatened to take the child away because she had a kool-aid stain in her fridge! I was there with her when all this happened. I was SHOCKED to say the least! And when you see the cases on TV about fathers or mothers, killing a child, they blame the other parent for not reporting the abuse...well in cases like what I wrote above, I see why they dont report it because nothing was done in the first place even when they had hardcore evidence!