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he Left today :-(

post #1 of 17
Thread Starter 
Robert left today for Fort Benning, Georga for Boot Camp. I don't know how i will handle this seperation . i'm so use to seeing him 24-7, him being there to hold me, cuddle with me and goof around and make me smile when I feel depressed. I'm terribly scared of the dark and with him gone i just wont feel safe anymore.
I WANT MY BABY BACK!!!!!

I'm barly surviving today, oh how will i handle 16 weeks and 3 days of no Robert. No one to love on at night.


Ashley
post #2 of 17
post #3 of 17
awwwwwwwwwww
post #4 of 17
We are all here to give you a helping hand and a hug...
post #5 of 17
Ashley, any time you need someone to talk to feel free to contact me. Believe me, I know how you are feeling. I can really empathise with this. The best advice I have for you right now being the first night is: have something warm to sip on (tea or whatnot), lock all the doors and windows, call your mom or even his mom if you are close.... curl up with a good book in bed until you fall asleep. (If you are like me you'll check the windows and doors a few times). The first few nights are going to be really hard. The emptyness when you lay down will really hurt, I won't fib about that. It does get easier at night.... but the evenings will be the most difficult for you.

The best advice I can give you is to open up. Talk to someone you trust and don't hide your emotions. There is nothing healthier than a good cry. You need to pamper yourself for a few days. Go ahead and get that pint of Ben and Jerry's and that chick flick you've been eyeing but he never wanted to watch and pig out. Have your very own pitty party. You deserve it. Get into a patten and try to stick to it. Try something new each weekend... go for a nice walk with your headphones on, go window shopping.... search on the internet for a welcome home gift for him, but don't buy it yet... keep looking. On the weekends I'm always looking around for that perfect something to send my husband.

Keep a journal of how you're feeling and things you're doing, and let him read it when he comes home. It will give you something to look foward to and him as well. At Boarders they have this great little book called "About Us' and its questions that you answer and one he answers as well. David and I got this book and I'm slowly going through and filling it out and when I am finished I'm going to mail it to him so he can read my answers then fill out his and send it back to me.

Little things you do are really going to make a difference in the long run.

Please please contact me anytime if you need to chat. I'm more than willing to talk to you about whatever is upsetting you. And bless Robert for joining the military. He's really begining a great career, stressful on him and his family but it is also very rewarding. The first time you're out and someone over hears he is in the military and they just walk up to you and shake his hand and thank him for everything he is doing for our country.... it is a feeling that you will never forget.
post #6 of 17
post #7 of 17
I'm so sorry, I know it is really hard! I have been "left at home" through three deployments so far and my husband is now in Korea. I was depressed and pretty inconsolable when we had to deal with our first separation, and believe it or not, you DO get stronger and you learn how to cope without him there. (It's always the first two weeks that gets me the most, when I have to "re-learn" how to be on my own. But once I do, my work, school if I have any, family, church, friends, and of course kitties take a LOT of my attention!)

Keep in contact with your family and friends, and make sure to keep yourself busy so you can't think too much. But remember that you are never alone! I am also a PM away. Keep on being proud of him, and just pray for him.

Oh, and last thing, remember to take care of yourself because when he comes home, you want him to think, "Wow, my wife is even more beautiful than when I left!" Believe me, he will appreciate it!


And congratulations on your wedding!!
post #8 of 17
I`m sorry Ashley...I`m sure you will miss him terribly...but try to keep yourself busy and the time will seem to go by faster!
Linda
post #9 of 17
Awwwww! Big hugs to you. Least you're kitts & pups are still there right?
post #10 of 17
I know the feeling. It's always so hard when they first leave. If you ever need someone to talk to, PM or IM me.
post #11 of 17
My ex was in the navy. When he first left, I would dig one of his shirts out of the dirty laundy hamper, and sleep in it. It helps you get through the first night or two, to have his smell with you. You can also cuddle with his pillow some. I know how hard and lonely this is! Hugs to you, and him!

He is a hero!
post #12 of 17
Thread Starter 
Morning everyone and thank you for the support. I slept ok I guess stayed up till 3 am watching "Robots" got tired and fell a sleep after tossn and turn'n. I stayed at my moms and im still there. Her dog sleept with me, its a darn bed hog. I started a journal or really im writing letters to him but not sending them, just a way i can cope. i dreamed about him but it was about yesterday.
I guess i'll be writing on here too if no one minds it at all?


AShely
post #13 of 17
Oh dear Ashley...
I can´t change the things....
BUT I can listen to you and send you a big hug!
Don´t give it up!
post #14 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ali012281
Ashley, any time you need someone to talk to feel free to contact me. Believe me, I know how you are feeling. I can really empathise with this. The best advice I have for you right now being the first night is: have something warm to sip on (tea or whatnot), lock all the doors and windows, call your mom or even his mom if you are close.... curl up with a good book in bed until you fall asleep. (If you are like me you'll check the windows and doors a few times). The first few nights are going to be really hard. The emptyness when you lay down will really hurt, I won't fib about that. It does get easier at night.... but the evenings will be the most difficult for you.

The best advice I can give you is to open up. Talk to someone you trust and don't hide your emotions. There is nothing healthier than a good cry. You need to pamper yourself for a few days. Go ahead and get that pint of Ben and Jerry's and that chick flick you've been eyeing but he never wanted to watch and pig out. Have your very own pitty party. You deserve it. Get into a patten and try to stick to it. Try something new each weekend... go for a nice walk with your headphones on, go window shopping.... search on the internet for a welcome home gift for him, but don't buy it yet... keep looking. On the weekends I'm always looking around for that perfect something to send my husband.

Keep a journal of how you're feeling and things you're doing, and let him read it when he comes home. It will give you something to look foward to and him as well. At Boarders they have this great little book called "About Us' and its questions that you answer and one he answers as well. David and I got this book and I'm slowly going through and filling it out and when I am finished I'm going to mail it to him so he can read my answers then fill out his and send it back to me.

Little things you do are really going to make a difference in the long run.

Please please contact me anytime if you need to chat. I'm more than willing to talk to you about whatever is upsetting you. And bless Robert for joining the military. He's really begining a great career, stressful on him and his family but it is also very rewarding. The first time you're out and someone over hears he is in the military and they just walk up to you and shake his hand and thank him for everything he is doing for our country.... it is a feeling that you will never forget.

People still do that to my dad and he was in Vietnam
post #15 of 17
Thread Starter 
Robert called me last night from the airport in Atlanta,georga. He was telling me he was feeling sick(the cold that has been going around caught up to him).
He said he doesn't want to do this again so after the 3 years are up we are going to buy a house and settle down somewhere and live out our lives as it should be. He is comming down for christmas for two weeks so i can't wait to see him.
He told me that when he see's me he is going to hold me and love me and never let go.
I knew he would change his mind about the army when he got there, he went in for the wrong reason and is regreting it now. I'm happy I got to talk to him though.
This is really tearing at our hearts.


Ashley
post #16 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by golden_moon_luv
This is really tearing at our hearts.
Ashley
Thinking of you!....
post #17 of 17
I deffinatley understand your feelings. DH got home from his 2nd deployment to Iraq this September.

It's hard and it stinks, but if it's any consolation, the last deployment was the easiest. Ok that's not much help, but keeping busy does help. I watched tv or listened to the Bible on tape while I fell asleep. TCS helped a lot! Talking about our babies and everyone elses made me smile.
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