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Baby Questions

post #1 of 22
Thread Starter 
No, I am not pregnant. But I am curious about how Anne and others take care of their babies. When I had mine, my inlaws had always told me that holding a baby alot is bad. Mexican women are taught that if you hold a baby for too long, that they can get very bad. If you put them down to cook or do housework they will cry until you pick them up again. Or when you need to go to work and live him with a babysitter, he will cry. What do you guys think. None of my sisters in laws ever held their babies. When they are bottlefed, they would prop the bottle. The babies would be in their cribs or in their baby carrier. The women never spent time with the babies. Doing house work, cooking, or watching tv, but never holding them. Only time is when they are being bathed or changed. I always thought this kind of thing is bad. No bonding. I did hold my babies but everyone kept nagging me about not doing it. Is it just old wives' tale? Not one of the women ever breastfeed.
post #2 of 22
Breastfeeding and holding your baby are the two best ways to bond. My children were in my arms most of the day when they were babies and we are very close to this day. I feel sorry for any child that never gets physical contact with its parents..feeding time is one of the most special, intimate times you can spend with your baby. Why withold your affection?? My kids even slept in our bed between my husband and I when they were infants. I think that had a huge part in them being the happy, well adjusted kids they are today.
post #3 of 22
I completely agree w/ Melissa here. Although we did not have any of our kids in our beds. But I breastfed both of my chidren for 8 months each, and I held my babies a LOT! I did a lot of snuggling, and a lot of physical bonding. They are GREAT kids....very happy, healthy, and well adjusted and well behaved. I do not believe in the theory ( and I mean no offense Alicia to the "mexican culture" here ) that you shouldn't hold your children. That disgusts me. Of course as they get a little older, you can't cater to their every whim, but there is a big difference between not spoiling them and giving them affection.
Cuddle, hug, breastfeed, hold, carry, kiss, and do anything else you can to let your child know you love them more than anything else.
post #4 of 22
..and NEVER let them go to sleep at night without a hug, kiss and an 'I Love You'
post #5 of 22
Very well said Melissa! I tuck my kids in everynight, even when my son says he wants to do it by himself. And I always go back in before I go to sleep to give them an extra kiss. They are sweetest when they are sleeping, right????
Love and nurture your children as much as possible. You can never go wrong.

ps. Hey Melissa, I see you passed the 1000 post mark!!!!!!!!!!!!! Its party time!!
:rainbow: :rainbow: :rainbow: :rainbow:
post #6 of 22
We are definitely on the same page with this one You can Never love your child too much!!

Thanks for noticing that DanielaWooohooo for me!!!
post #7 of 22
Well, my kids were both bottlefed, and nobody shared the bed, but they got plenty of tlc. My daughter, who is just shy of 13, still likes to be tucked in at night. It's the nicest feeling when she asks.
post #8 of 22
We went the attachment parenting route, breastfeeding, family bed, that deal. I think it has been the best thing for my daughter.

Someone said to me, when I was first a mom, "A spoiled child is a happy child but a brat is a brat". I think all kids need love and physical affection. They live so much in their bodies, not their intellects, and you can't just tell them something, the words aren't always very meaningful to them. They need hugs and cuddling!

Kids who don't get enough snuggling, tend to develop failure to thrive and attachment disorders. They are in general more violent. As adults, they often associate any phycial contact with sex. Plus there is so much neurological development that has to do with physical interaction.

Besides, doesn't it break a mom's heart not to cuddle her little ones? I would have been breaking all the "rules" if it was me!
post #9 of 22
All my children have been breastfed, 2 for 6 months, we're trying for a full year with baby, and all shared the bed with us until at least a year. I wouldn't do it any other way.
post #10 of 22
I agree with everyone else here, when my baby is born, I plan on spending as much time as possible holding her, and loving her.
Especially since I will have to go back to work full time, probably 6 weeks after she is born, I want to spend as much time as possible bonding with her in those first few weeks.

I hate the thought of having to leave her with a sitter all day when I return to work, but unfortunatly there isn't any other option, we can't afford to live only on what my husband makes, we have to have two incomes.

I am planning as of now, on breastfeeding, so I will have to purchase a high quality pump, so I can pump the milk out and take it to the sitters.

I don't think you can ever show your baby too much affection, or hold them too much!
post #11 of 22
Just an FYI for you Debby, the Avent Breast pump system is super, and it is quite affordable. I used it with my daughter because I worked mornings for a while and I was able to express my milk quickly and effeciently. I loved the one I had!!
post #12 of 22
Thanks, Daniela!! I wrote that down!
post #13 of 22
Also, Debby, sometimes it's cheaper to rent a pump. I know the hospitals sometimes do this, plus there must be other places. They have the ones that do both sides at one time, and it takes hardly any time at all!
post #14 of 22
Oh wow, I never thought about renting one. I wonder how much it costs, and how long they let you rent it for. if I had to rent it for a very long time, it might be cheaper to just buy one, though.
post #15 of 22
In my opinion renting is only feasible if its for a short time. The Avent is $59.95 plus the bottles are extra. Its a manual, but don't let that scare you. It is as effective as any electric or battery pump. It has "petals" on the part that attaches to your breast that "massage" while you pump to make you able to express more milk in a short period of time. I bought mine on a whim, and it was fantastic. The only drawback, is that it only fits with Avent Bottles, which are more expensive than the regular ones you can buy at any store. I bought about 5 bottles, plus the pump, and it totalled out at around $100 bucks.
post #16 of 22
Thats not really a bad price at all, considering how long it would last me. If it only works with Avent bottles, I think I would get 5 or 6 of them also, I will have to remember that. Thanks again for the info!!!!!
post #17 of 22
Thread Starter 
Hey Debby or anyone- Have any of you gone through the WIC(Women, Infants, and Children) program? I used it with my two children. You can either put your spouse's income or yours but not both. I loved it, it helped me alot. I was unable to breastfeed my children as I had inverted nipples. They did give me some shells to put under my bra but they hurt. While I was pregnant, they gave me food such as milk, cheese, cereal, juice, eggs, beans, and peanut butter. I also had to attend classes. After my babies were born, I was able to get formula, baby juice, baby cereal, and other things. If I were to breastfeed, they'd give me carrots and tuna fish. I did want to breastfeed, but it was hard.
post #18 of 22
I know of two people who used WIC....they loved it. Its a great program from what I hear. Unfortunately their financial guidelines are quite strict, and I think a lot of people who could use the assistance don't get it because they make too much money. I believe you have to make less than $500 per week from what I remember reading. At least that is here in Massachusetts.
post #19 of 22
Well I DEFINATELY make less than 500 per week, :LOL: but not with hubby's income included. Do I have to include his income too?
post #20 of 22
Well, when I checked into it about 6 years ago before I had my son I was turned down flat out. From what I remember it all depends on if you are married. If you are , then you have to use the higher of the two incomes....so if he makes more than you AND it is less than $500 then you will probably qualify. Its also on your gross pay, not what you actually bring home after taxes.

Its worth looking into, especially if you have financial difficulty. They will help you with everything you need, including foods for you if you are breastfeeding. A good friend of mine uses it, and she gets 8 cans of formula per month, which is plenty for a one year old. She also gets tuna, peanut butter, milk, cheese, eggs, and bread all with these voucher thingys they give you. As your child gets older, they adjust what you are getting.

Give it a try Debby, you might qualify.
post #21 of 22
I will try it, but I doubt I will qualify. The thing is, he makes at least that much a week, but not after they take out the child support he owes each week on two children. Do they count that?
post #22 of 22
I think that my parents got WIC for a few years when me and my sisters and brother were younger. My dad didn't make that much and my mom was a housewife. I know that it helped out ALOT. And everything that you can get with it is healthy, so it is all good for you and you don't have to worry.

Debby-you should check into it and see if you qualify.
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