I still need to keep my nose out of it right?

I am just checking in again.. I posted on Friday that my resident Bella was having a hard time with my new girl Trixie coming into our home. I have done the introduction proecdures, gone slowly and both are spayed, separate everything food, litterboxes, etc.
So all weekend I stayed out of it.. went along w/ my business and just loved on both my sweet girls equally.. even tried playing w/ each and just acting like everything was normal
Trixie is so curious about Bella and wants to be friends And she 's her momma alot and follows me around saying hi. Its the cutest. BUT Bella is just being soooo territorial!! She has turned into a every time Trixie is in the room or at least with in 'her territory'. Bella has settled down a little since Friday when she was hissing when Trixie was in the room. Now Bella doesnt hiss unless Trix is within about 3 feet of her. But Trixie is soo friendly and is trying hard to not provoke her and will stay quite a few feet away if Bella gets upset. Everytime Bella hisses, Trixie just looks at her for a second and then lays down. She has never hissed back or gotten upset at Bella. Today Trix accidentally got too close to her (she was excited about some treats!) and Bella took a swa at her. Trix didnt respond but just backed up a little. Sometimes too I find Bella sitting at the entrace of the great room (which she sees as HER space) and not letting Trixie come in. BUT I want Trixie to come in..so its for me right now.

Hissy told me I should keep my nose out of it and let them figure out who is Alpha.. but its hard.. there is nothing I can or should do right? Mostly I miss my sweet tender Bella who is right now and barely wants to even cuddle with me or be sweet anymore. AND I feel bad for Trixie who is new and just wants friends. I hope it gets worked out

PS_ they are home by themselves ALL day today for the first time..yikes!

Until they have established their positions in the cat family...I don`t think I`d leave them all alone and together.....especially where one is so much smaller.(Trixie is a kitten, right?)
Otherwise, as long as no one is getting hurt ...(not that you won`t hear an occassional yowl...but as long as the one being hurt can get away and is`nt continually attacked) I`d just let them be. They really will figure it out in thier time.
Linda

No Trixie is 2.5yrs old.. She is 9lbs and I think can take care of herself if she wanted. Mostly she just wants to be friends and seems like she cant figure out why Bella is so bothered.

When my two ladies met for the 1st time, Pete Pete was 6 and had been the only girl in the house for all those years. Colonel was 11 and had spent all her 11 years on the streets of Oakland...I thought sure Pete would get whomped. The two of them had their spats, nothing serious, just growling, hissing & an occasional swat. This went on for about 6 months...it came to an abrupt halt the day my sister unexpectedly brought a pit bull puppy over to my apartment. Colonel took front-and-center, growling to keep the puppy at bay while Pete Pete and her brother HID behind the Colonel. That pretty much established the Colonel as alpha and while the ladies are still not friends, they are not mortal enemies, either. I have also had great luck using a Bach flower essence called Peacemaker for my cranky Pete Pete. It's very simple to administer, just a few drops in the water a few times per day & she is more loving to her cat siblings AND her people. You can find it at www.spiritessence.com if interested. Good luck with your girls!
Amanda

thanks ! I just ordered the Peacemaker and I plan to use topically on Bella and maybe spray in my apartment. She has IBD and I was happy to see that this company is sensitive to that and actually recommends their essences to help with any stress related relapses -- which Bella could certainly be prone to.
AND I think I will head home early today -- like NOW so I can make sure my girls are ok

having recently introduced a kitten into a house of two adult cats, moved, then adding an adult dog to the mix, i think i might can help. add to that one of my adult cats has addison's disease and is especially prone to changes of environment... well, it was a challenge.

the main thing was i had to let the "kids" work it out between themselves, with one exception: when the ad-cat (chase) became too frustrated with the kitten (ricki) and hissed so often i thought he was going to hyperventalate, i intervened. but it was only because he is in a certain state of health that required me to. otherwise, i just let them growl and stare at one another. the adult female (heidi) had nothing nice to say to ricki for the first few weeks, but after a while, she mellowed out. while she doesn't exactly love being around her now, she is tolerant. chase actually likes her. both have been seen grooming her!

one thing i learned about when first trying to deal with chase's addison's disease was the feliway diffuser. some people say it works, others say it doesn't, but it did work for chase (for a while - he seems to become resistant to every medication we try!). it produces a scent that is similar to the horomones cats mark in their territories, and it makes them feel safe and "at home." you might want to try some of that. i didn't have any luck AT ALL with the feliway spray. in fact, my cats seemed to hate the way it smelled and ran away any time i used it anywhere. go figure! but you can get the feliway diffusers online at amazon or ebay for a decent price - just make sure and ask the seller if it's within it's expiration date! they sometimes forget to mention that when they are selling at such great prices!

jessie