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How to let go?

post #1 of 9
Thread Starter 
My cat had kittens about 6 weeks ago, and they are all happy, healthy balls of fun. Unfortunately, we have five adult cats in the family, all totally indoors, except for their giant cat-habitat hubby made for them outside (fully enclosed but lets them gets some fresh air, eat grass, climb their tree etc). We live in the country and there are no number limits on cats for homeowners --- but enough is enough!!
Trouble is, everyone has naturally become very attached to the kitties -- everyone has a different favourite and as they grow and get more personality, it has been difficult to think about rehousing them. I know we have a few weeks yet, but I was wondering, is there any way to make this task easier? If it is hard for me, it will only be worse for the kids! How do you let go with the least misery? Any ideas?
post #2 of 9
When I was in this situation, I thought it helped to 1) try to make sure it was someone we knew so that we might be able to visit once in a while and also so you feel comfortable with the home they are going to, and 2) when you do choose who they go to, focus on the fact of how much love they will get. We had 8 kittens for 11 cats total, and I tried to think about how, even though we loved them, they would get a lot more attention once they were adopted. Hope that helps some. I know how hard it is.
post #3 of 9
I'm having the same problem. April had a litter of 7. I found homes for 2 of them with people I know. I have been to visit them a couple of times so this helps. I have 5 more kittens of which I had originally intended to find new homes for 2 of these ones. I found a home for the female (Robyn) but the people said that she was not adjusting to their home and did not seem to be happy. I kept my original offer which was to take back any kittens of mine which the new owners couldn't keep. She is doing fine here. For some reason I think that she may have missed her momma (April). I dunno if cats actually miss their mommas, but it seems that she is attached to hers. Anyway, as they are on their 13th week now I am attached and probably will keep the remaining 5. My problem is how to afford the vaccinations and spay/neuters for them all. Any suggestions on that?
post #4 of 9
My problem is how to afford the vaccinations and spay/neuters for them all. Any suggestions on that?
Talk to your local vets if they have a multi cat discount. I understand it is difficult to let go....but if you cannot afford to keep them all, it is best to try to find them a loving home (the rule of thumb for our rescue is that kittens must go to home in pairs..that way they are less likely to become unhappy as they have a littermate to grow up with).

post #5 of 9
Katie, it is always difficult. There are some things you can do to ease the transition. Remember, YOU get to choose who the kittens go to and you get to make sure they go to loving homes. Always give the new owners your phone number and e-mail address and suggest that they might like to update you on the kitten's progress once in a while or even send a picture or two through e-mail (and how the kids would love that). I always tell new owners that I will call in the next few days to make sure everything is going OK with the kitten and then I'll call a couple of weeks later. It gives me reassurance that all is well and there's nothing better than hearing the love in their voices as they describe the antics the kitten is getting up to.
post #6 of 9
I hope Momma cat going to get fixed so that this does`nt happen again.....for everyones sake concerned.
post #7 of 9
Letting go can be one of the most difficult things when it comes to kittens. For me, it is never, ever easy. But, as the others have said, I hand-choose the family, the home, the people caring for the babies ... I ask them to promise to update me and all of my kitten buyers have done so. I even got a lovely visit from one of them recently with a kitten now just over a year old out of Lexus and Tonka's first litter. It helps, but honestly and from the heart, only a very little.

The part that is so very hard for me isn't MY letting go so much as it is watching Lexus when the last baby has gone. She looks for them and when she can't find them, she is agitated and not at all easily calmed. It is heartwrenching to hear her calling for them and even more so to watch her during the "giving up" process. Once she determines that no matter how loudly she calls or hard she looks, they just aren't here anymore, she sighs frequently and sits right at the edge of my bed facing out towards the hallway as if she is just waiting for them to once again walk into the room. It is during this time that I sincerely question my decision to breed - and to knowingly/willingly put Lex through it. For me, it is about the bigger picture, cruel and heartless as though that may seem to some. As a breed preservationist, this (along with other issues) is a part of it ... admittedly, not at all a positive part, but a part nonetheless.

When kittens leave my home, there are most certainly always tears. I cry for days afterwards. They bring so much joy and life force into my home and I miss them desperately when they leave.

So, as one who can definitely understand and relate, please feel free to either PM or email me if you like ... my rule is: Around me, no one cries alone.
post #8 of 9
Thread Starter 
Thanks to all for your suggestions. Naturally we will get Silvie fixed - very soon now. It all happened because we took in a boy (from my son who had to move interstate for his work) and then we found Silvie as an abandoned stray. She was (still is) very small and the vet said she was 4-5 weeks old. Our vet only desexes when a cat is 6 months old. Standard practise here in Oz. Well, we took Charles (son's cat) to be done when he was 6 months old and we were waiting for Silvie to reach that age for her operation. Then one night my younger son said Silvie had a firm tummy - maybe she was going to have babies. I laughed at him! Silvie was only, supposedly, about 4 months old and Charles was the only boy she had been around. Our cats are never, ever outside unless in their habitat and that is cat-proof (to get in, or out!). Anyhow, I looked at Silvie that night and she DID have a round little tummy, and really pink nipples. I took her to the vet, who said she was indeed pregnant. It was a shock to say the least. The vet said she may have been a touch older than they thought and she may have come into heat young (although no-one ever saw anything to indicate that) - and it was just awful timing with Charles getting fixed. So we now have 5 Silvie-Charles kitties. All our cats get desexed, vaccinated and microchipped. We had two when we lived in the states and imported them with us when we moved. People thought we were mad to spend thousands on flights, paperwork and a month in quarantine --- for plain ol' moggies --- but our cats are family. This kitten experience was so unexpected and each week brings new things to learn.
We will keep one, maybe two, but we have no choice but to rehome the rest. I liked the idea of the "please return if not happy" policy. That would ease my mind, as will giving contact details for updates. It is such a tough time!!
Well, thanks again for the advice.
post #9 of 9
You also may want to ask to microchip the kittens and have them registered in both your name and the new owners name in case they ever somehow get away and are picked up by Animal Control.

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