PLEASE please HELP!!

I am so upset over this and don't know what to do. I brought in a new cat/kitten, adding to my house a third. I read up beforehand and have done everything I was supposed to do. I.e. created a safe place for the new cat in a separate room, keeping her closed in there - away from the other two cats. Well, when I first brought her in, in the cat carrier, my nicest cat, Cali, was sitting on the coffee table so I thought I'd just show her to her. I really didn't think I'd have a problem with Cali, just Lilly. So Cali starts hissing so I take the kitten to her safe place where she's been ever since. Well this was last night. Well Cali is completely distraught, hissing at everyone including her sister Lilly. She's hiding under chairs and tables and growling and hissing. She's NEVER acted like this and I'm afraid she'll never come around to the kitten. And why is she now acting out and hissing at her sister? I'm so confused and don't know what to do - PLEASE HELP!!

Cali is upset at the new kitten. There is a new smell in the home now, an intruder. There Cali was perfectly content with two felines in the home, and now she has to get used to another one. To add to her uneasiness, her human brought in the kitten in a carrier, meaning the kitten is higher than cali was in height, therefore, now the kitten is twice the threat as it should be because height represents status in the cat world.

Leave Cali be, start putting vanilla extract on each cat- use the pure vanilla extract under their chins, between their shoulders, and on the base of their tail, just a tiny bit several times a day. This will help make them smell all the same.

Put up a screen between the new kitty and the resident cats. Many hardware stores sell kitty proof screening and you can easily make a door for the room the kitten is in.

Hissing is not bad, it is the first defense in a cat's arsenal of weapons. Hissing and growling is perfectly acceptable and normal and nothing to worry about. What is worrisome is if you stood above Cali holding this kitten in the carrier, thus creating an unintentional threat. If you did that, you need to keep them apart for at least 4 more days and then let them meet accidently- leave the door open a crack and then just go about your business and let the cats work it out.

Awww jeez! I didn't realize what I was doing at the time (with the carrier), now I feel just awful. The vanilla extract sounds like a good idea - I'll give that one a try. On the other hand, the kitten is doing well. Has abandoned the under side of the bed and is playing with her toys, etc. I just feel bad holing her up. Oh well, don't want to traumatize my babies so it will have to do for now. Thanks for the advice!

THe reason I didn't think this would be such a feat is because my neighbor got a new puppy a couple months ago. Well she loves to come visit me, and my two dogs (yes I have a zoo). She sneaks under the fence to come visit. Well, I've had her in the house a couple times and the cats are very inquisitive but have never hissed at the puppy ... just watch her. So why the difference with the kitten? I figured any new animal smell would be all the same.

One more question: Why is Cali hissing at her sister?

Cali is hissing because she is on edge-and she is on guard. She is essentially telling all who is within hearing distance to leave her alone-

The reason the kitten is more of a threat than the puppy is Cali smells your smell on the newcomer as well as the kitten's own branding scent. She knows...oh no, mom just brought home another one that will STAY here. I would not suggest you add any more cats to your home for awhile-

Oh LillynCali, I just found your thread! It doesn't actually seem as bad as your first thought, I don't think!

I believe that we are both going to be at this for a while, but I will definitely give you my support! We will get there in the end!

I'd love to hear an update on how you are doing! Are you sorting out a scrren for them?!

Update on my transition Sar: Cali is still so distraught and I'm getting worried about her. She is totally not herself these past few days. I just now even tried to give her my cereal milk - which she usually LOVES - and she wouldn't come out from under the chair. Now I'm getting worried that this distress is not good for her health - she's a pretty chunky kitty. I still haven't let my resident cats see the new kitten. I'm scared to! After the carrier incident, I'm afraid of upsetting Cali even more. Lilly, however, is fine. I might take her in to meet the new cat today. Do you think it's a good idea?

I'm so sorry that you are having such difficulties! Maybe with time, Cali will calm down - have you been trying the blanket swapping thing and the vanilla extract?

From what you say, the kitten hasn't been in your home for long, so I think given time, things will get easier! So I have heard from others who have done the introduction thing too!

We are trying the Vanilla extract thing today and have also brought the sheet - that Little'un has been sleeping on - into the lounge for Tibby and Molly to smell! I have also built a gate to separate them, but still allow smell etc.

If you like, I can give you a hand with how to build the gate!

Please do PM me if you want to chat, we are definitely going to have to go through this together!

Do you think that Lilly will be okay with meeting the new kitty?! I would suggest that if you are going to do this, then use the vanilla trick - then when Cali sees Lilly again, they will all smell similar! I wouldn't let the kitten and Lilly have propper contact yet though!

Good luck with it! I'm sure you'll all do great....soon!

FINALLY!! WE HAVE PROGRESS!! I opened the door to the bedroom and just let Mia (the new kitten) explore. She was hesitant at first and once she gets outside of the bedroom, any noise sends her racing back in - but she is exploring. Cali and Lilly are just watching at this point and I don't even think she's seen them (Cali is under the chair with her eyes barely peaking out to watch and Lilly is perched at her favorite spot on top of the kitchen cabinets ... watching as well). There's been no hissing or agressive behavior and actually - I just looked over at Cali and she is now trying to nap - which is good, means she's relaxed!! PHEW!!! I think I've finally made some progress here! I'll keep ya updated and I want to hear how your's are coming along as well!!

You are really rushing these introductions. Let the cats tell you when it is time. If you have a visibly upset cat, allowing your second cat into meet the kitten isn't going to go very well for Cali. You think she is hissing now- just wait till your other cat has the kitten's smell all over her.

Just relax, you should concentrate on keeping cali calm and getting her to eat, especially if she is obese. if she doesn't eat soon you could have a major health crisis on your hands.

Stress in cats cause illness. it is quite possible that Cali that stressed herself out to the point of being ill. I would go to petsmart today and buy several Feliway Comfort Zone Room diffusers. You can also find these in feed stores and good pet stores. Plug them into the room where Cali is hiding as well as the main room where the cats hang out.

Don't be is such a hurry to make a happy group out of these cats. They have their own timeline, and trust me, it no way compares to yours!

When I brought home Trinity all I got was hissing and growling from Trigger and Trin was about half his size and really shy. She wasn't very used to people, anything. When they acted like that my first thing was to call my aunt and ask her why. She outlined the basic territorial problems and all so I made it a point to put trigger in one pet taxi and Trinity in another then leave them close for about an hour. This made them get used to each other and it only took about two days before they were laying around cleaning each others ears, lol. Your cat's will get along eventually, Trig and Trin were the same way when I brought in Stormie and they are the only thing Stormie really socializes with. It will get better, and once they are used to each other you will never be able to get them apart. Good Luck!!!

Well things are now settling down and getting back to normal in my house. Cali is now acting herself again - I bought some cans of fancy feast to treat her and was glad to see her come running - like usual - when I opened the can. She's abandoned her posts under chairs and tables and is now back lounging on her favorite spots. Even rolling around for me to rub her belly too!! Where the whole process turned positive was actually when I opened the door to let Mia explore. Lilly and Cali being able to watch, then show their dominance (they hissed and growled at Mia and she did not do the same back to them) I think made them feel like they had not lost control of their home. I have been giving them extra attention too. Sneaking in at times to check on my addition as well. Everyone seems to be adjusting. I'm not even gonna ATTEMPT my dogs yet though. I only had the door open when the dogs were outside. Mia's never seen a dog so this will be a whole other thread!!!

Well, congratulations on your success with the babies.

I must say you are lucky it has happened so smoothly cos it was a pretty quick way to introduce them!! Perhaps Cali just needed to see that Mia is new and small but NOT more important than her - your decision to treat Cali and pay extra attention to her is exactly the way you should have done things - she needs to know that she is top cat in your eyes and so with that out the way she can concentrate on letting Mia know that, too.

They will still need to be supervised for a while to come yet, though, when they are together. Just because things look like they're running smoothly at the moment, it doesn't mean that the situation isn't still new enough that problems could happen when you least expect them.

But well done, and I'm pleased things are working out for you

Well good! I`m glad things are going better than everyone expected. Sometimes it works out that way and I`d say you "lucked out" like I did with my 2 (Did`nt know anything about an "introduction time"...just let the new one loose in the house almost instantly...but after initial hissing and growling they were playing together in 3 days....but they were both 6 mo old fixed kittens too!)....some people have not had it work out so well and it was a loooong process for them.
Hopefully your dogs are not the hyper type! I would`nt rush that either...esp if they are.
Good luck to you.
Linda

They're not necessarily hyper yet they love cats and my cats have always loved them. They think all cats will feel the same - which isn't necessarily the case...lol.

No - it certainly isn't! We got a new pup on the weekend and he is not even remotely interested in the cats, which is just fine by them. He watches them, of course, and has a sniff, but that's it. They love it!

Ruby, on the other hand, gets so overexcited around them that she runs around in circles madly and tries to knock them over to play with her....they are terrified of her!! As is the new pup, incidentally...lol lol