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My kitten is indifferent to everything

post #1 of 8
Thread Starter 
I need some feedback on this.
I have had my kitten for a month now (he is now 8 months). When we (my husband and I) got him from the shelter all he wanted was for us to hold him like a baby - he just purred and purred. A month later, he still likes to be held, but in the evenings only. We initially thought that he craved human attention - however, we're a bit surprised that he seems as though he has yet to really form any attachment to us.
It's hard to describe - he will let you hold him and pet him for a while, but he doesn't seem to "like" it. I get the feeling that he tolerates us only. He doesn't give any indication of dislike that I know of....no tail twitching or ears back or hissing. He sits and watches us and runs around the house lots and tries to play with our other cat who is a bit older.
Our other cat (also from a pound) was very scared of us at first, but now will nuzzle with us and seek out attention when she is in the mood to. Our little guy tolerates attention, but doesn't seek it out. I still try to give him attention to let him know he is loved, but try not to irritate him by giving too much - of course, reading him is very difficult!

I am used to cats who communicate when they want attention or do not - you can read their moods somewhat. This cat never really communicates anything. One other example, he never gets scared of the vet, or anything else. Maybe his lack of fear of anything is related to his lack of emotion.

Is it possible that our kitten will ever form a bond with us?
Is there something that I can do? Sit with him after I put food out so he knows we're the source of food?
post #2 of 8
Thread Starter 
post #3 of 8
a lot of times we don't know answers to things and we leave it alone. I will say, however, when we first got Gibby he was just a love, and after about a few weeks, he wa just.. exploring. He didn't ewant to be held nd cuddled and loved on, he just wanted to wander about and play, thank-you-very-much. That said.. he's still a lover, and when you pet him he adores it and purrs and purrs.. but he will only take so much of it.

What I'm trying to say is.. he's a kitten, and honestly, once the kitten knows it's loved and safe, it's really just interested in getting deep into the evorinment a nd playing like crazy. He'll come back around to being loving when he's a little less of a kitten.
post #4 of 8
I don't think there's anything wrong with this cat and there's nothing you can or should do. Maybe he just doesn't need the attention you're used to with your other cat. The other thing is that it can take months before a cat in a new home, especially one who's barely more than a kitten, feels completely uninhibited. I'd suggest just being patient and you may see this cat's personality develop and open up with time.
post #5 of 8
He sounds like a typical cat... Dax went through a stand-offish phase around that age and I also wanted to know where my cuddly kitten went. Your kitty is growing up and they do seem to go through personality stages - give him play time, plenty of love and you should see your kitty develop into a well rounded cat - he might just warm up again as he gets a little older, just like Dax has.

It could be a sign that he feels safe now with the life you have given him - no longer seeking constant reassurance - give yourself a pat on the back, you have a moody teen!
post #6 of 8
Is your new little guy neutered? If not, it's pretty typical that a male kitten won't reach out for much attention. Our Hobbes was like that, too, and within a week of him getting neutered, he was on my lap day in and day out...if I was sitting, he was on my whichever way he could be.

So, no worries.

If he's neutered, it might be that he's too distracted by playtime. I wouldn't worry about it. His inner-cuddler will probably come out as he grows older. Regardless, whether you see the bond or not, it exists. He knows his mama and daddy, and knows he's safe. You just have to know that it's there.
post #7 of 8
Was your other kitty an only cat? Sometimes when you get a second cat, they get so much love and attention from cat #1 that they don't need you as much. We had one foster cat that we sent to another foster home. While here, she bonded most with Garfield. She really only needed the humans for food! When she went to another home with more standoffish cats than Gar, she warmed up a lot.

Just give him time. If he was at the shelter for a while, he thinks people are expendable, and a replacement will come along soon. As he continues to live in a loving home, he will grow stronger bonds with you.

Festus was born at my house and has lived here for her entire 17 month life. She is no longer a cuddlebug, and sometimes I wonder if she even loves me. Then, if I watch close, I'll notice her laying near me a lot. Or meowing at me in her whiney voice. She isn't like Garfield, who jumps on my lap and gives headbutts, but she does love me.
post #8 of 8
Thread Starter 
Thanks! Great tips!
I forget that my 18-year old cat (who now lives with my mom back where I grew up) didn't want attention at all until she was about 12 or 13. Now she can't get enough!

I just want to make sure that my new "babies" are happy in their new home and it's been a long time since I've had an 8-month old.
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