Are other breeders like this?

mihoshi

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I hope this isn't too far off topic but this behavior is disturbing to me and just wondering if anyone else works with someone or acts this way themselves. Not going to use names so no one will know who I'm speaking of, but it seems very odd to me.

I've been speaking with someone across country about adopting a bobtail to show in the alter classes and possibly take on as a second breed down the line. I've been talking to her since before I had Maus and she seems to forget EVERYTHING that we ever talk about. She's made several deals for me to make her a website in exchange for a kitten that she's never followed threw with (literally, I'll pick out a kitten and she'll never send me the information/pictures to do the site and then just not contact me until after the kitten is sold). She also said last year she was sending me an alter as a baby shower gift, never happens, although I didn't really expect it.

But it's when I am trying to adopt with cash that it really aggrivates me. I picked out a kitten last year, had the deposit ready to go the next day - then she contacts me and says the kitten died (not her fault of course), but she had a Mi-Ke girl I could have instead. I say okay, a week later she decides she's keeping the Mi-Ke, but a breeder she knows in my state has a kitten available now. She gets that breeder to contact me and we start to go threw the process when the first breeder comes back and says she forgot she'd already agreed to adopt that kitten I was looking into (HUH? makes no sense...).

I didn't talk to her for a long time after that, but then she wrote me about her money troubles and asked if I still wanted to show an alter. I waited a few months, she had a litter in July and basically picked out a red and white kitten for me. I went along with it as I love to have a good show cat and it never hurts to have another breed under your belt, anyways, she said she would snail mail me pictures and all that so I could make a final choice, that was August 9th. I heard from her for the first time (no pics or anything) again today, she told me she has two girls left, one is going to the breeder in my state, that person gets to pick, and the other is being sold to me - with NO explanation as to what happened the the red/white, where she's been, what this cat looks like, or even asking if I would still be interested - she just flat out told me I was taking the leftover kitten from that litter to show and RW.

I said no in a very longwinded message, but does anyone else do this to people? I feel completely used, manipulated, and controlled, and this seems like a disgusting way to conduct a cattery on a continuous basis. I know it's sort of a fool-me-once situation and I've been a fool to keep taking the bait, but she acts so nice in between the crazy times that I keep falling into the trap so to speak. So I'd just like to know if there's a method to the madness that I just don't understand, or if she's gaining something by this; is this some ultra strange way to prove devotion? Do other breeders behave this way as a standard or am I right to cut ties? I dunno, just thought I'd get some feedback on the topic since I don't see much of this here.
 

kai bengals

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She sounds way off the mark. Maybe she's an alcoholic? Forgets the conversations?
The whole thing sounds fishy. Would you even want a cat from her at this piont anymore? Who knows what sorts of stuff you'd be in for after you have that tie to her.
I can't recall any breeders I've ever dealt with being that odd.
Now, people wanting a kitten...yeah I've had some weirdos come around!
 

nebula11

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I don't profess to know anything about breeding, or showing, or the standards therein......but I have to say that your breeders (umm ex-breeders) behavior very much mirrors that of a drug addict.
 

luvmysphynx

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I agree with Nebula11 and Kai Bengals....... I would walk....no run the other way.

Think about this.....you get a kitten from this woman and there is a problem or question down the road. You will have the same problem then. Also I hate to think of how she takes care of those kittens, maybe I am wrong, but I would find another breeder!
 

goldenkitty45

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There are good and bad breeders. She's one of the bad ones from your story. Anytime you deal with a breeder, get things in writing and not verbal.

I learned the hard way about verbal agreements. We had bought a rex to show in the alter class - no problems, very happy with the cat/wins. So we returned to the same breeder to get a breeding female to start our cattery with. We got a lovely little dilute calico. Had it about a week and it stopped eating. I had never dealt with a cat who refused to eat and because the kitten was small, she didn't survive (after taking to the vet - dehydrated quickly).

Anyway, we called up the breeder heartbroken and she told us that she would replace the kitten out of the next litter (had vet papers to prove everything). We agreed on the phone. So a month later she had another kitten for us but wanted an additional fee (more then the original price of the kitten that died). We were shocked because this was supposed to be a replacement kitten - not additional fee. She got really mad about things and told us she couldn't afford to be replacing kittens for free and etc. We told her she had promised the replacement as it was not our fault and that just because others had ripped her off, she shouldn't treat us the same way.

We hung up and never heard from her again. We got a lovely breeding female from another breeder who gave us many show quality kittens even if she was not top show herself (she did eventually grand).

So we learned to get things in writing and not just a verbal agreement.
 

merrytreecats

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Run {don't walk} away from this "Breeder" is what I would do. There seems to be no point in dealing with someone who never follows through on anything and even worse, plays mind games. I would especially not try buy anything from someone like this...
 

sol

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Well, I luckily have never met a breeder like that one. Don't put any energy on her. Take that energy and find yourself another breeder instead and remember: Whenever you make a deal with a breeder... have it put down on paper! No matter how much you trust the person, write a contract!

It's people like this breeder that make us all breeders look bad
 
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