Tough Decisions to make.

Hi all

A little tale for you all. I am the proud, and loving walking tin-opener for 4 cats, whom my wife and I treasure as our family.

The youngest of these is a neutered female whom we refer to as "Carmen", and here she is....



That's my little carmen, the baby of the family, aged 6, a few months ago.


Now, if this were any other site, I'd expect everyone to go "awww, look at the cute kitty". But I suspect I am in good company with people who adore cats here. And you will notice how drawn her face looks, how much weight as fallen off, how glazed her eyes looks, how the spark has gone. This is not a happy, or indeed a well, cat. Furthermore, this is a cat whose bones now stick out from every angle painfully, a cat who drinks water all day, every day. A cat that never moved from where she is placed except to drink. A cat that never eats, never seems to sleep. A cat that has lost maybe 1/3 or more of its body weight.

And this has happened to my cat in less than three weeks. This is a cat with Chronic Renal Failure.

So, liking to consder myself a good and responsible pet owner, and I hope you will not miss the anger and bitterness I am feeling here, I have thoroughly researched the problem. I have quizzed vets, read every site I can find on the web, read books and more. What I learn is not good news. My pet has a disease that is not only terminal, but also must be aggressivly treated, with awful secondary effects, and promises nothing but a rollercoaster of emotions that will ultimately end in a losing battle. This sucks. This is my youngest cat, my beloved Carmen.

So now what. Do I go for the aggressive treatment, and eke out whatever time I can with my pet? I am, if I am being honest, uncertain. How fair is this on ehte cat. she is blatently unhappy, and blatently suffering. Her eyes have me in tears everytime she fixes my gaze. Can I take us both on that rollercoaster and is it fair on either of us. Or do I draw the line here, and remember Carmen as a happy member of our family who passed away peacefully.

Its theultimate question all pet owners must face, and the first time I have faced it. The decision is ultimately mine to make, but I feel as if Carmen has already told me. Yet I read so many stories of people working to get months or even years more with thair companions. Oh I don't know.

Carmen was diagnosed Today. She hasn't eaten anything fora couple of weeks and is severely dehydrated. She is going into the vets to go on a drip tomorrow.

Can anyone tell me what to expect, and offer any advice on whether I should ask the vet if it is time to have her put to sleep. When it comes to aggressive therapy, money is not an issue. Time might be. but more than that, I'm not sur eI want to put my pet through an endless series of unpleasant and traumatic therapies.

please help

Gareth

I am so sorry! It sure does come fast. I think you know in your heart what to do. This is your baby and you described how unhappy she is. Maybe you can give the fluids a try. But it is up to you. Look into her eyes she will tell you what to do!

Gareth i'm so sorry She's gorgeous, and it must be such a difficult decision to have to make, but i would have a long talk with your vet when you take Carmen in and see what he says.

Where in the UK are you from, the South?

yup, West Sussex

First of all, I'm sorry your cat is ill and you're going through this now. We're going through a similiar emotional experience with one of our cats.
Everyone here will hope your cat gets better, but I think ultimately you have to put your own emotions aside and do whatever is best for the cat.
If you trust your Vet completely and he/she tells you there really isn't any hope and only pain and misery awaits your Carmen for the short time she has left, seems like the choice would be clear. On the other hand, if there is hope for some quality of life, for however long that might be, I personally would choose to treat her if she were my pet.
I know exactly how tough it is to make the right choices when you see your pet suffering.
The very best of luck to you and I hope you get some good news from your Vet.

I would talk to the vet. However, this is your cat and you know her better than anyone. I lost my beloved Max, almost thirteen years old, in July. He was diagnosed with renal failure on Friday and we put him down on Monday. It broke our hearts. The vet first thought he had chronic renal failure, but then decided he had some symptoms of acute renal failure. We never really knew. Max was a dignified cat all his life and I wanted him to die dignified. Our vet said he might could do some things that would prolong Max's life, but he couldn't promise anything.
Nobody can make this decision for you. Look at how the cat is now, is it eating etc.
Know that our hearts go out to you in this tough time. It is not an easy decision.

I am so very sorry for what you are experiencing. How hard this must be for you! You are right, the decision is ultimately yours, and I do not envy you it. Carmen will understand, whatever you decide. My heart is with you during this difficult time.

Reading your post Gareth made me cry, my heart truly aches for you and the anguish in your heart right now. I too had to make this decision in May of this year, and it is one that rips your heart to pieces. The only thing that got me through it was knowing that my Boy was in pain and there was nothing we could do for him. Just like your Carmen, the spark was gone.

One day I saw him laying on the kitchen floor, and just the look on his face - I absolutely knew 100% that we simply could not prolong it any more. I'll never forget his expression as long as I live, but at the same time, it was that expression which helped me do the right thing.

Lora

I'm so sorry that your family and Carmen are going through this. I myself have had to deal with similar situations and like others have already said...you know Carmen best and you will know what to do. I will be praying for your sweet furbaby.