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New Cat

post #1 of 2
Thread Starter 
I recently adopted a cat to keep Fu company. Fu is a very active, athletic cat. Kai on the other hand is a demure female who loves to cuddle. Fu loves attention too but after he has play a lot or if its cold out. I love him. He sleeps with me tucked up against my chest when its not too hot. I did a pretty good job raising a happy, confident kitty who knows where his boundaries are and trusts me. I found him in the bushes on my way home from work. I cant believe what a wonderful friend I found. I made sure when I was playing with him as a kitten that he would succeed a lot and be confident in his natural kitty skills. He usually does not bite too hard when Im playing with him and if he does I let him know its too much. We have it down to soft bites and token claw grabs. I have not had marks on my hands in months. I did it that way because I like to chase him around and wrestle with him. When I leave my studio he meows a sad meow and I tell him I have to go to work. I rescued Kai from a 1 bedroom apartment that was home to 5 other cats as a companion to Fu. She was the smallest and got beaten up a lot and seemed stressed and cringed a lot, but also wanted attention. Unfortunately I live in a studio and I did not have a seperate room to house her in so I had to drop her in with my playful athletic male and cross my fingers. I figured it would be better for her than getting beaten up by the two dominant cats at her old home. Fu just wants to play with her. Although I think he messes with her a bit because she is so whiny. When he tries to play with her she makes a horrible racket growling and hissing. But the hissing is getting a bit half assed lately and there is almost no growling today and yesterday. Although I would ultimately preferred to have a playmate for Fu that matched his athletic nature and be his wrestling buddy, I really like Kai. She is beautiful and a real sweetheart. These cats rub noses and can be pretty close to each other without any problem, its just when Fu tries to play that she takes it as aggression although they are not cuddly. Lately I have been trying to work with Kai's confidence by playing with her with a toy mouse tied to a string and using a soothing voice and some treats. When I play with her Fu never butts in and waits attentively for his turn. Kai has all the signs of a scaredy cat. She cringes when I walk past her, squeaks when I pet her, although she is getting more comfortable with that etc...

Im thinking about using the vanilla to match their scents. Other than that what can I do for Kai to show her that she is safe here and we are not going to hurt her? All we want to do is play with her and have fun. Im thinking that its going to take a lot of time and reinforcement and nothing bad happening to her for her to learn that its ok here.
post #2 of 2
It is really up to Kai to realize she is safe with you and Fu. Fu loves to play rough and Kai having been "beaten up" in the past can't tell the difference between playing and bullying.
You are doing okay. The fact that they are rubbing noses and getting close to each other are very good signs.
Let Kai watch you play with Fu. In time, she will surprise you suddenly by joining in.
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