Fostering a family of strays, need advice please.

Hi everybody,

I'm brand new here and would really love to get some advice. This came out a bit long, so please bear with me. I live in a desert area where there are many stray cats. So I currently have 7 cats (5 boys and 2 girls), ranging in ages from 6 - 1 years. Six of these kitties came from my own back yard, the 7th from a shelter. All are indoor kitties, all are spayed/neutered.

Early this year a stray white female cat started hanging out every day in my back yard. After awhile I started putting food and water out for her, and then she basically lived in my yard almost 24/7. Then she started letting me pet her, more and more, especially when I was bringing her food. I started calling her Nadia. I thought very hard about adopting her, but when I adopted my 7th cat in 2004 I swore to myself "This is the LAST one!" Plus my oldest cat Lily is sensitive and neurotic and already doesn't like having so many other cats in the house.

Not surprisingly, Nadia turned up pregnant. What did surprise me is that she gave birth literally on my back doorstep. The nest was only a few feet away from my back door, and not in a good place - not secluded or protected at all. A few hours after the kittens were born I decided to bring the whole family into my house (my bedroom, seperate from my other kitties) with the idea that I could socialize the kittens (there are 4 of them) and find homes for them, and adopt Nadia myself. Nadia hissed and spit at me a bit when I moved everybody, but she let me do it.

Okay so, now the kittens (all boys) are 7 weeks old. They are pretty well socialized, I think. They are scheduled to go to a small no-kill shelter when they turn 8 weeks old on the 16th (this is the same place where I got my one shelter kitty, it's a nice place and they have a good rate of adoption).

Question: should I keep one of the kittens?

Nadia was fairly tame when I brought her in, but she really regressed in those first few weeks. She will not let me pet her anymore, she hisses at me all the time, and she does not like me touching or handling the kittens (though she minds it less now that they are older). I'm sure most of this has to do with her being a very protective new mother.

Here's my thinking in favor of keeping a kitten. Nadia was very upset at being put in captivity, and she's still not crazy about it. I cannot introduce her to my other kitties until she is tame and has gone to see the vet. That means she'll be living alone in my bedroom, probably for weeks at least. Maybe I'm projecting, but I just think it would be too hard on her to be cooped up alone in this strange place, losing all of her babies in one fell swoop. If she could keep one of her babies with her, I think she would be happier and I wouldn't feel so guilty leaving her alone for most of the day.

And yes, I admit, I have gotten massively attached to the kittens and the thought of giving all 4 of them away to strangers is tearing me up. Keeping a kitten would be harder on Lily and my other kitties, but they have adjusted before and can probably do so again if I give them lots of extra love and attention.

On the other hand, I think keeping a kitten with Nadia means that aggressive-protective maternal behavior of hers would continue for quite awhile. So it would probably take much longer for her to tame up again. Plus it would be easier on my own cats to only have to deal with 1 new kitty instead of 2.

Of course I could release Nadia outside again if she's really unhappy, but I can't do that till she's spayed, and I can't get her spayed till she's tame.

So there's my dilemma. It may not sound like much, but I've been agonizing over this decision like crazy. I want to do whatever is best for my cats, for Nadia, and of course for the kittens, but I just don't know what that is.

One final question. My house is a little over 1500 square feet, plus I have a small screened porch that I leave open whenever weather permits. How many cats is too many for that sized living space? Or am I already there?

If you've read this far, thank you very much. Any advice whatsoever would be greatly appreciated.

~Lilydilly

Thank-you for showing such kindness to our furry friends. "7"...wow...that is a handful.

Regarding your question of "should I keep one of the kittens"? Are you thinking of keeping one of those kittens for yourself or for Nadia's benefit?

8 cats is quite a lot...financially, emotionally & for the general health of your cats; just my personal opinion. I have 6 on the inside and it is a struggle. Dividing your love, attention, finances, space, etc. by 8 is a decision that can only be made by yourself. Trust me when I say, I understand your dilemma. I have fostered many a kitten and look after an outside colony of 5. I would love to take them all in and provide them with love, safety & a lifetime full of kindness but in reality, I am only one person...I can't keep every stray and/or foster baby.

I'm not understanding why you have to wait to have Nadia spayed? Tame or not...she can be caught using a trap or other means & be spayed immediately. Maybe, I missed something...not sure if she is still in your home or on the outside.

Hi,

You don't need to wait till Nadia is socialized (feral kitties cannot be tamed) but they can be socialized, but there is a lot of time involved to getting them to that state where they trust and accept you. If it were me, I would run Nadia in to the vet, get her spayed now, keep her for 24 hours after the spay and re-release her. My guess is, she will take up residence outside your home, and now since she can't have kittens, she will be safe from that aspect of it.

I am curious, you say in part of your post that you aren't going to have more than 7 cats, but you want to keep one kitten? As someone who rescues ferals and strays privately and deals with mulit-cat household conflicts, you might want to rethink that and rehome all the kittens. But , it is your choice.

If you can handle the numbers, and keep up with the vet care and if you have the room for more cats, than certainly keep one or two. But there will be more kittens in the future, and if your time and space can be used for those in need, that is something to consider as well.

To socialize Nadia, you need to have a lot of time to invest in her. It can take a long time for that first headbump or nudge against your leg. It would be a better option to put her in a carrier or a trap and get her to the vet, get her spayed and release her within 24 hours of surgery


Good luck whatever you decide-

I think too many cats depends on your comfort level and that of your cats. Nadia will adjust to losing the kittens, so you don't need to keep one for her. And she definitely does not need to be tame to be spayed. Vets can easily spay totally wild cats. In fact, once she loses the hormones, she may tame easier.

I would suggest that you let all the kittens go for adoption. It sounds like you are already feeling at your limit, and it is much easier to adopt out the young, cute kittens.

Some people do believe in keeping the kittens with Momma for 10-12 weeks...that would give you a little more time with them. And it lets them finish weaning, and learn some social skills from Momma.

Best of luck, you are a good person to take in Nadia and her little family!

Thanks to all for the replies.

I guess I wasn't clear before. Nadia is living in my house, in my bedroom with her kittens. She cannot get pregnant again because all my kitties are fixed. So I am in no rush to get her spayed soon. There are no TNR programs in my area, and I'm pretty sure my vet will only spay tame cats. I can ask around some more about that.

I have 7 cats and would PREFER to keep the number of cats in my house at or around that number. Right now everybody is young and healthy, but I dread what my vet bills are going to look like once they all start getting old.

Nadia is presently unadoptable. The shelter won't take her because she is an adult, not to mention feral. I am confident I can tame her with enough time, and have gotten very attached to her, so I would prefer to keep her and give her a good life, even though it would mean having 8 cats.

I am thinking about keeping a kitten both for Nadia's sake and my own. But in the end, what is most important is what's best for Nadia, my 7 kitties, and the kittens, so that is why I am asking. What is best for them?

Thanks again.

Hi Becki,

I did think about keeping the kittens until 12 weeks of age. But I just want to give them the maximum possible chance to be adopted, and so I figure it's best to get them to the shelter while they're as young and adorable as possible.

I will ask around about getting Nadia spayed before she's tame. She's still nursing (obviously) so I don't know how long I should wait after the kittens are gone.

Thanks.

Originally Posted by Lilydilly

Thanks to all for the replies.

I guess I wasn't clear before. Nadia is living in my house, in my bedroom with her kittens. She cannot get pregnant again because all my kitties are fixed. So I am in no rush to get her spayed soon. There are no TNR programs in my area, and I'm pretty sure my vet will only spay tame cats. I can ask around some more about that.

I have 7 cats and would PREFER to keep the number of cats in my house at or around that number. Right now everybody is young and healthy, but I dread what my vet bills are going to look like once they all start getting old.

Nadia is presently unadoptable. The shelter won't take her because she is an adult, not to mention feral. I am confident I can tame her with enough time, and have gotten very attached to her, so I would prefer to keep her and give her a good life, even though it would mean having 8 cats.

I am thinking about keeping a kitten both for Nadia's sake and my own. But in the end, what is most important is what's best for Nadia, my 7 kitties, and the kittens, so that is why I am asking. What is best for them?

Thanks again.

Click to expand...

Lilly....problem is....even if your cats are all fixed..when this momma goes back into heat..she will try to get back outdoors and will become pregnant again. I've read of feral cats that ripped screen just to get back outdoors. I would follow Hissy's advice and get her spayed. Here is a list of low cost clinics by state, click it and scroll down until you find your state:

http://www.lovethatcat.com/spayneuter.html

Also...here is a list of groups that work with feral cats...most states do have at least 1 feral cat group and you can start from there even if they aren't close to find out whether there is anything local:

http://www.alleycat.org/orgs.html

Okay, thanks TNR.

How urgently would I need to move here? She gave birth on July 22nd. Assuming the kitten leave at 8 weeks old as scheduled, how long would it take before she's likely to go into heat again?

Originally Posted by Lilydilly

Okay, thanks TNR.

How urgently would I need to move here? She gave birth on July 22nd. Assuming the kitten leave at 8 weeks old as scheduled, how long would it take before she's likely to go into heat again?

Click to expand...

I've heard of cats going back into heat very soon after giving birth....so I would schedule her spay appt. for when the kittens are weaned (around 6-8 weeks of age)...when the kittens go to the shelter would be a great time to take her in to be spayed. Definately keep her indoors and monitor the situation. I do hope some of those links are helpful.

Katie