Yay!

pandybear

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some of you might remember a thread i started about not wanting children, at the time it was pretty much just me because i hadn't discussed it with my husband yet which i was afraid to do incase he told me he wanted them.

anyway, last weekend he sat me down for a talk and siad that if i really don't want them then he's happy to leave it because it's a huge responsibility and even if we had them now they would be with us until we were nearly fifty, effectively taking up the rest of our lives


he also said that he had wanted them because he felt we should....because you get married then have kids lol but i told him not everyone does these days and that i'm happy just to have my cats and dog and he was happy with that!

it's such a huge weight lifted off my shoulders, now i can stop worrying about it and start thinking of all the awesome things i can do in a kid free life





felicia
 

4kids4cats

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Felicia,

Congrats! I guess ...LOL!

Most people get congrats for being pregnant not the other way around. I am glad you both agree not to have kids instead of one wanting them and the other not. It can ruin a marriage.

I myself had mine REALLY young. I am 30 and my son(14) starts high school tomorrow. My daughter(almost 11) starts middle school. It was hard at first, but now life is so much easier now that they are a bit older.

Anyways.... so what fun things do you plan on doing that we "parents" can hear all about? Please tell me travel..... I would love to hear about awesome adventures


Bobbie
 

beckiboo

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Well, I won't congratulate you on not having kids, that just sounds funny! LOL! But I will congratulate you on opening the lines of communication, and coming to a happy agreement with your dh. Sounds like you had really thought things through, and now you are both happy with this very important decision.

Remember, you'll be missing lots of fun! This summer, I paid $230/week in daycare! And I have been away from two weekends, and have 3 weeks worth of laundry for 5 people to catch up on! And I'm getting off the computer, to give my 16 y/o his on-line time.

Ah, well, I love them dearly! Enjoy your time with your dh and furkids! Congrats!
 
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pandybear

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i didn't mean parents can't travel
my best friend is a single mum and she leaves her daughter with her mum and still gets to travel a bit.

it isn't so bad if you are very young when you have them because then you have time after they leave the nest to do your own thing but if we had them now we would be fifty before they left and neither of us are prepared to do that.

i'm also so glad we have talked about it because it has been weighing on my mind and i didn't want to dissapoint my husband but at least i know we feel the same and it's such a good feeling...i'm just not a kid person and i never have been, even when kids come to visit i don't really want them there...yes i'm mean lol, the young one's especially are just so noisy and time consuming


i just feel better iv'e talked about it and know we are on the same level regarding children.
 

4kids4cats

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We travel too, but not as much as we could if we didn't have kids
These monsters can be expensive...LOL

Anyways...congrats again!
 

lionessrampant

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I am incredibly proud of you and happy for you that you were able to have this conversation with your hubby! I wish the both of you a very fun and happy kid-free life together!
 

purr

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I'm glad you both agree on it. It would be terrible if you didn't! I can certainly understand not wanting children! You can still hang out and babysit for friends and family with kids if you want to be around them once in a while.
 
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pandybear

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Originally Posted by Purr

I'm glad you both agree on it. It would be terrible if you didn't! I can certainly understand not wanting children! You can still hang out and babysit for friends and family with kids if you want to be around them once in a while.
exactly, i have a neice and a neice or nephew on the way plus a godchild so that's enough for me


plus, kids would just get in the way when i want to have pool party's and get drunk all hours of the morning, i can't imagine being able to sleep in with them around
 

purity

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That must be such a relief for you


I don't want children either, and when talking to men I like and they mention how they can't wait to play with their future sons/daughters, my heart always sinks a little. Must be truely great to have found such a kindred spirit!
 

KitEKats4Eva!

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I, too, don't want to have children. It's not because I don't love and adore them, I just don't want any of my own. Neither does Max. It is very much a relief to have a partner whom you can discuss such HUGE issues with and have them come out and be kind and understanding, and also so that you feel that you haven't pressured them to your way of thinking.

So glad you got it all sorted out! You must feel like flying!
 
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