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Ten things that piss us off

post #1 of 15
Thread Starter 
Rarely do I get a really funny email. This one hit the chord for me.

Ten Things that piss us off ...

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is, buddy ... where the heck is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is??

2. People in the supermarket check out line who wait until their
entire bill is rung up before they begin writing their check. Hello...is the store name going to change, or the date, or your signaturebefore the clerk finishes? Get a clue!

3. People who are willing to get off their butt to search the entire room for the darn TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TVand change it manually!

4. When people say..."Oh, you just want to have your cake and eat it, too." Screw that!!! What good is a piece of cake if you can't
eat it? What should I do...eat someone else's piece of cake instead??

5. When people say..."It's always the last place you look." No
kidding!! Why would you keep looking for it after you've already found it?? Do people do this?? Who and where are they??

6. When people say, while watching a movie ... "Did you see that?" No, dummy, I paid $7.50 to come to a theater and stare at the ceiling up there. What did you come here for??

7. People who ask, "Can I ask you a question?" Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya buddy?

8. When something is "New & Improved," which is it? If it's new,
there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement then there must have been something before it!

9. When a cop pulls you over and then asks if you know how fast you were going. "You should know, buddy. You're the one that pulled me over!"

Here's the 10TH thing that really bugs me....

10. Chain letters! Who the heck thinks that by annoying other
people with stupid mail with no meaning, that they will grant you a wish, or make your long-lost love fall into your arms. Baloney! I'm so sure that by breaking a stupid chain letter that the computer gods are going to curse me!! What a crock of ****!!! By the way, if you send this to 10 people, nothing will happen, and that person you're in love with won't come crawling to you... so if you feel this is funny, go on and send it to someone else, but don't expect one darn thing in return!

And... have a blessed day..
post #2 of 15
That is a good one, Deb! :laughing: I can certainly relate to being irritated by several of those!!!!
post #3 of 15
Ha ha ha ha... that is too funny!!! Love the "I don't point at my crotch when I want the bathroom do I?" one!!! WAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAA
post #4 of 15
:LOL: Sounds a lot like George Carlins style, that guy is hilarious! Thanks for the laugh, Deb :laughing:
post #5 of 15
I can relate to all of those!!! HAHAHAHAHA. Thanks.
post #6 of 15
They are so funny. :laughing2: Thanks I needed a chuckle this morning.
post #7 of 15
LOL! I can relate to those. I love the one about pointing to your crotch when you have to go to the bathroom!! lol
post #8 of 15
Ha ha ha h... hey Spook - thats the one I liked!!! ha ha great minds think alike eh?!!
post #9 of 15
Thanks, Deb ! 2 threads to make me laugh in one day. . . .

While we're on the subject of "P"ed off: I spent all morning trying to get an answer to a simple (Or so I thought, DOH :homer: ) question at a Government Services Office of Housing. A girl answered the phone(after I think, the 15th ring and the 25th time thru the "your question is important to us; so please stay on the line. . . " recored message). I asked my question and she replied, "I don't know." Like she exected me to be satisfied with that. . . HELL-O "Do you think you could find someone else who just MIGHT know the answer?" (like she thinks I'm gonna just go away. . . ) I DON'T THINK SO, Honey! Well, she put me back on hold to try and find someone else there who could (or do we "guesstimate"; would) help me!
The same girl comes back and says that she thinks I have the wrong office for this inquiry. . . . . (What was her 1st clue? I knew that 3 seconds into the scenario!) Now I am picturing 3 or 4 young gals putting their callers on hold and getting together in a common corner, emory boards in hand and spearmint popping; and trying to come up with "inventive" albeit "witty" responses to return to their phone inquirers; in hopes of satisfying(nay, ridding)themselves of this "inconvenient" interruption of their work(?) day. What are they being paid to do? If you don't know the answer, then, isn't it your job/duty to at least try to find someone who does?

Needless to say; I never got an answer, but I did get the same run-around at each of the 3 subsequent numbers I was given to call. Is it just "Paranoid Me" or did the girl who answered the phone at the last number sound sorta lke the first chicky trying to do a bad Puerto Rican accent. . . . I swear I hear gum popping in the background and I could (almost) smell nail enamel. . . .
post #10 of 15
Thanks for the laugh, Deb! Those were great.
post #11 of 15

:laughing2 :laughing2 The cop one was great! I remember I got a bigger ticket when I asked him something similar :laughing2
If it weren't for my brother being a cop, I'd probably have no license!
Those were great, thanks Deb!

Darlene, it never ceases to amaze me the buerocratic red tape you have to go to just to talk to someone in a government agency. Usually, you have to make an appointment for a phone call down here!!! No kidding! :laughing2... Next thing you'll hear a message that you'll be charged you 5.00 per minute for tying up their phone lines!

post #12 of 15
I really appreciated those laughs..they were hilarious. My favorite was the bathroom one- too cute. Thanks for sharing!!
post #13 of 15
cute story. A few years back a trucking acquaintance who happened to be a retired USAF pilot was stopped on the 401 in Ontario for driving a bit....briskly. The OPP officer strode up and demanded to see his jet flying licence. Buddy calmly passed over exactly the licence requested. No ticket. I would have loved to have witnessed the look on the officer's face.
post #14 of 15
Thread Starter 

That story is priceless!


Always good to see you, sister. Don't be such a stranger! You've had us "on hold" here quite a bit lately.
post #15 of 15
Deb.....that is just sooooooooo funny :o) I was howling with laughter! thanks hun
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