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I know most of you may think this is a really dumb topic - Page 2

post #31 of 52
Sounds splendid but I can tell you as you get older such as in your 30's and 40's its much harder to find a man so if you want a husband get it before you turn 25 as it will be mostly impossible after that. I didn't get one as I had some bad times with guys in my teens and 20's so it didn't happen to me but I'm just giving all of you younger ladies so advise. Personally, I'm not keen on getting married or having kids. Just not my bag I guess. My Taffy is my baby to care for. I'm happy about that.

I wouldn't call him if he never showed. If he's anxious to see you he will call if not, then move on as he's not worth it if he hurts you.
post #32 of 52
You said you had his phone # and e-mail, did he have your info? Is it like here, where if you are online, he can't call?

Either way, I am very proud of you for initiating contact with someone you find to have potential. I hope things work out. If not, I am sorry.

The weekend before I met dh, I met another guy and gave him my # and everything. He never called. Now I'm very glad! I know you are years away from thinking of a dh, but it can be true for bf too!

post #33 of 52
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beckiboo
You said you had his phone # and e-mail, did he have your info? Is it like here, where if you are online, he can't call?

Either way, I am very proud of you for initiating contact with someone you find to have potential. I hope things work out. If not, I am sorry.

The weekend before I met dh, I met another guy and gave him my # and everything. He never called. Now I'm very glad! I know you are years away from thinking of a dh, but it can be true for bf too!

Yeah he has my info and it's my cellphone number so it wouldn't effect anything. He gave me his myspace account too and I see that he was online already because he added me.
post #34 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Taffygirl_2005
Sounds splendid but I can tell you as you get older such as in your 30's and 40's its much harder to find a man so if you want a husband get it before you turn 25 as it will be mostly impossible after that. .
What!!!
I so disagree with this. I honestly believe finding a husband in your 20s is not a very good idea (at least for me). I am totally coming in to who I am in my 30s finally, and know exactly what I want and how I want it. The guys I would have picked for husbands in my 20s, well, lets just say I would be divorced by now.

Anyways, to the original poster. Forget this guy, no matter what his excuse is. Unless something horrible or traumatic like an accident happened, there is no excuse for not showing or not calling. And if he just "forgot" that is even worse. Guys do these things because they know most of the time they can get away with them. Don't let him get away with it. Just my 2 cents. Sorry it didn't work out, but there will be someone better just around the corner hunny!!
post #35 of 52
I have always had a very strict rule with myself that any guy that didn't call/didn't show when he said he was going to, gets the boot! Chances are, he didn't stand you up to be mean, he's just, well, a teenage boy, and is therefore about 80% hormones, 10% video games and 10% pure stupidity.
I have PLENTY of stories of stupid crap guys I was dating in high school did, and once they stood me up or didn't call I would just call them and say:
"You know, its a shame you screwed up so bad, because I really liked you, but I have high standards for myself for how I treat people and how I, in return, wish to be treated, and you're just not cutting it!"
Then, I would eat a pint of Ben and Jerry's, cry a little, and move on!

I know it seems like he's the cutest, most fabulous guy in the world...but, cute guys are a dime a dozen: GOOD guys are harder to find.

You're so young, and obviously such a special girl. Don't let this guy make you crazy!
post #36 of 52
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by OllyExtra05
I have always had a very strict rule with myself that any guy that didn't call/didn't show when he said he was going to, gets the boot! Chances are, he didn't stand you up to be mean, he's just, well, a teenage boy, and is therefore about 80% hormones, 10% video games and 10% pure stupidity.
I have PLENTY of stories of stupid crap guys I was dating in high school did, and once they stood me up or didn't call I would just call them and say:
"You know, its a shame you screwed up so bad, because I really liked you, but I have high standards for myself for how I treat people and how I, in return, wish to be treated, and you're just not cutting it!"
Then, I would eat a pint of Ben and Jerry's, cry a little, and move on!

I know it seems like he's the cutest, most fabulous guy in the world...but, cute guys are a dime a dozen: GOOD guys are harder to find.

You're so young, and obviously such a special girl. Don't let this guy make you crazy!

Half of me wants to forgive him and keep him...the other half wants to scream at him..flip him off..then walk away.
post #37 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lil_Axl_Gurl
Half of me wants to forgive him and keep him...the other half wants to scream at him..flip him off..then walk away.
NO!!!! Forgive him for what? Making you wait ALL DAY for little old HIM? You got all excited, wasted your day, for what? So he could "forget"? Not acceptable. It's very disrespectful and sign of things to come in the future.
post #38 of 52
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by journey
NO!!!! Forgive him for what? Making you wait ALL DAY for little old HIM? You got all excited, wasted your day, for what? So he could "forget"? Not acceptable. It's very disrespectful and sign of things to come in the future.
Well anything could've come up like I've forgotten about my friends before because I was so stressed out about how jam packed my day is.

Ooh I don't know what to do..I just wish he had a phone so that I could call him and figure out what's going on!!
post #39 of 52
It is 2:30 the following day... if it was a mistake he should have at least contacted you by now to beg for forgiveness

I say to heck with him and find yourself a new guy Your a cute girl it won't be hard.... But you can't do it sitting around fretting over him and why he didn't call
post #40 of 52
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by squirtle
It is 2:30 the following day... if it was a mistake he should have at least contacted you by now to beg for forgiveness

I say to heck with him and find yourself a new guy Your a cute girl it won't be hard.... But you can't do it sitting around fretting over him and why he didn't call
How can he call though..he has no phone..
post #41 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lil_Axl_Gurl
Well anything could've come up like I've forgotten about my friends before because I was so stressed out about how jam packed my day is.

Ooh I don't know what to do..I just wish he had a phone so that I could call him and figure out what's going on!!
Why do you keep defending this guy? Speaking from experience, he probably only wants friendship (otherwise he would have been knocking on your door when he said he would), and is too chicken to say otherwise for fears you might fly off the handle or something along those lines.

You just met him a few days ago, and obviously don't know much about him. My advice is to move on... I'm sure you'll find plenty of other cute 18 year olds nearby, and perhaps one who will treat you with a little more respect.
post #42 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lil_Axl_Gurl
How can he call though..he has no phone..
He could have e-mailed, then. Call one of your girlfriends, and go out and do something fun. The term "eye candy" is for someone who is fun to look at, but has no character. Or they look at a guitar, and when a cute girl walks by, they make up a story to make her interested. Superficially he looked and sounded good. Sorry that didn't turn out to be true!
post #43 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lil_Axl_Gurl
How can he call though..he has no phone..
In this day and age everyone has a cell phone... I am sure by this time he could have found someones phone to use.

Do you think it might have been possible that he was put on the spot by his friend, or possibly you about going out that he agreed only because he felt so bad to say no? When I was young I did that a few times (I was young guys, 13, 14, maybe 15 so don't hold it against me). I would agree to something only because it was easier to agree than say no when I was face to face with them. Then I just wouldn't show up or I would call and cancel.... DO you think it's possible that was the case?

I hope you don't think we are being hard on you, it's just that we are all giving you advice that we have learned from experience that it isn't worth wasting anymore time on this guy.
post #44 of 52
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beckiboo
He could have e-mailed, then. Call one of your girlfriends, and go out and do something fun. The term "eye candy" is for someone who is fun to look at, but has no character. Or they look at a guitar, and when a cute girl walks by, they make up a story to make her interested. Superficially he looked and sounded good. Sorry that didn't turn out to be true!
Don't have any friends.. And he didn't really make up a story I asked him about bass guitars and he owns one..he took me back to his place and was teaching me how to play and stuff.. Maybe I was too annoying for him..
post #45 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lil_Axl_Gurl
Don't have any friends.. And he didn't really make up a story I asked him about bass guitars and he owns one..he took me back to his place and was teaching me how to play and stuff.. Maybe I was too annoying for him..
Or maybe you were too perfect, and it scared him. How can a nice girl like you say you don't have any friends?
post #46 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lil_Axl_Gurl
Don't have any friends.. And he didn't really make up a story I asked him about bass guitars and he owns one..he took me back to his place and was teaching me how to play and stuff.. Maybe I was too annoying for him..
Hon, I'm sure you were NOT "too annoying" for him.
Please, don't let this guy, who is obviously an idiot, make you feel bad about yourself.
High school, no matter what anyone says about how much "fun" it is, is pretty much miserable, at least from my experience. The boys are all immature and have no idea how to treat a girl, the girls are all competing for the boys, and anyone who has even the smallest inkling of intelligence and individuality gets labeled a "weirdo".
Trust me!
I definitely had a few good friends in high school, and did my share of dating, but I was not even REMOTELY popular.
I went to a very conservative, very sports oriented high school, and I was very active in theatre from the age of 6 on, so, based on that alone, I was an outcast.
Also, most girls in my high school were more concerned with being "nice" and "pretty" than being smart and having any opinions of their own. I was a great student, and never afraid to share my opinions on any given subject, so that was another check against me.
My junior year of high school, I decided to cut my hair pixie-short (I still have short hair). Every other girl in school had long, straight blonde hair, and here I was, walking around with a dark brown pixie. All the teachers told me how cute they thought it was, but there was a group of boys who decided that since I had cut my hair short, I must be a lesbian! Until I graduated and got out of that place and went to college, they continued to harass me, and even once keyed my car! They got in MAJOR trouble for that one and laid low after that, but would still call me lezzy or lesbo when I walked by. And, to make matters worse, I only had 67 kids in my graduating class, so there wasn't a whole lot of friends to choose from.

Enough of my high school sob story, though. The moral of the story is this: I ending up going to a top tier liberal arts college where I made some of the greatest friends possible: people like me who were actors, artists, and weren't afraid of "different" people. My freshman year of college, I went out on a date on a whim with a boy who didn't seem all that promising. I barely knew him, but he seemed reasonably nice and was pretty cute, and even though I didn't really want to date anyone seriously, I went for it. On our first date we talked for about 6 hours straight.

Almost 7 years later, we're married, and I'm starting a successful career, have had much academic success, currently enrolled in a very competitive and highly selective graduate school program, living in a great city with a great home and wonderful friends who are REAL friends, not just people to hang out with.

There's a light at the end of the tunnel, and even if it seems right now like boys are idiots and its hard to have friends, don't let them change how you feel about yourself and who you are.
From the interactions I've had with you on this board you seem like a bright, caring, interesting girl. Don't let the teenage morons drag you down!
post #47 of 52
Thread Starter 
I just keep thinking of how uncool it was of my mom to say "I knew he wasn't going to show up!!"
post #48 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by vespacat
Why do you keep defending this guy? Speaking from experience, he probably only wants friendship (otherwise he would have been knocking on your door when he said he would), and is too chicken to say otherwise for fears you might fly off the handle or something along those lines.

You just met him a few days ago, and obviously don't know much about him. My advice is to move on... I'm sure you'll find plenty of other cute 18 year olds nearby, and perhaps one who will treat you with a little more respect.
I agree with vespacat...stop defending him!!
And don't you dare call him! Life is too short to waste on guys who don't follow the rules! Look forward to better things, don't sell yourself short, move on. A month from now this won't even matter & you'll be able to wonder why you were upset over someone like that.
post #49 of 52
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by vespacat
Why do you keep defending this guy?
Because I'm afraid of being alone
post #50 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lil_Axl_Gurl
I just keep thinking of how uncool it was of my mom to say "I knew he wasn't going to show up!!"
Yeah, that probably wasnt the best thing for her to say, but I'm sure she didn't mean to hurt your feelings. What she probably (hopefully) meant was that she knew that he wasn't that great a guy and was probably going to do something idiotic--which he did.

Don't think of not having a boyfriend as being "alone".
What would you rather have a boyfriend who stands you up, and makes you feel bad for yourself, or not have one at all? I'd personally go for the latter.

I'm sure you won't be "alone" for very long! Don't let this moron make you feel bad about yourself--him standing you up is NOT a reflection on who you are as a person but rather a reflection on who he is as a person--an immature, inconsiderate one!
post #51 of 52
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by OllyExtra05
Yeah, that probably wasnt the best thing for her to say, but I'm sure she didn't mean to hurt your feelings. What she probably (hopefully) meant was that she knew that he wasn't that great a guy and was probably going to do something idiotic--which he did.

Don't think of not having a boyfriend as being "alone".
What would you rather have a boyfriend who stands you up, and makes you feel bad for yourself, or not have one at all? I'd personally go for the latter.

I'm sure you won't be "alone" for very long! Don't let this moron make you feel bad about yourself--him standing you up is NOT a reflection on who you are as a person but rather a reflection on who he is as a person--an immature, inconsiderate one!
But I am alone..I seriously have no friends here whatsoever..my life is the computer..I'm not trying to make people feel sorry for me right now I'm just telling you guys EXACTLY how things are. Nobody here wants to even try to get to know me that's why I was so surprised when he kept talking to me.
post #52 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lil_Axl_Gurl
But I am alone..I seriously have no friends here whatsoever..my life is the computer..I'm not trying to make people feel sorry for me right now I'm just telling you guys EXACTLY how things are. Nobody here wants to even try to get to know me that's why I was so surprised when he kept talking to me.
Hmmm...I don't know your story - did you just recently move to where you are now? Are you 18? (you mentioned he was 18, just wondering if you were).

My life is the computer too, but I do have friends to drag me out sometimes......
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