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Criminal needs severe sentence!

post #1 of 20
Thread Starter 
Here's what happened. An innocent young woman (i.e. me) takes a lasagna out of the freezer and puts it in the sink to thaw.

at 8:15am this morning, she leaves for work, leaving only two cats (Joshua and Kinah) in the apartment.

12:30 she comes home for lunch to find her lasagna has been vandalized. Part of the aluminum foil has been removed (but not eaten) and cheese has been pulled off the lasagna and left lying on the floor.
The crime must have been committed by one of the suspects: either Joshua or Kinah. The criminal left one piece of evidence: a paw print on the lasagna! The two cats are of very different sizes and Kinah's paw fits the paw print perfectly.

She has therefore been found guilty on charge of "willfull destruction of delicious food", "unlawfully climbing on the kitchen counter" and "polluting the kitchen floor without a permit"

What should the sentence be?

(and more importantly, what am I gonna have for dinner now??)
post #2 of 20
That's HILARIOUS!!

My idea of sentencing would be to sentence them to one hour of me petting them (with no breaks-that'd drive my cats nuts heheh) then NEVER put MY food out on counter again!

Especially since I understand that tomato/tomato juice isn't good for cats. (might be wrong about that though).

Glad to hear it wasn't TOO serious ..

For YOUR dinner- why don't you eat some cereal OR order pizza/takeout??
post #3 of 20
Sentence Kinah to be renamed (at least temporarily) Garfield.

Sorry about your dinner, but I have to admit that I was literally laughing out loud reading your story!
post #4 of 20
Thread Starter 


Alright, as soon as I get home tonight I'll give "Garfield" her non-stop-petting torture!

anything else?
post #5 of 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by marie-p


Alright, as soon as I get home tonight I'll give "Garfield" her non-stop-petting torture!

anything else?

AND FEED her TREATS until she is sooo bloated she can't move!!
post #6 of 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by valanhb
Sentence Kinah to be renamed (at least temporarily) Garfield.

Sorry about your dinner, but I have to admit that I was literally laughing out loud reading your story!
I was thinking maybe Garfield posessed one of the cats and took the lasagna.
post #7 of 20
LOL sorry about your dinner but that sounds to funny..


I would say..umm..make her watch animal planet all night lol
post #8 of 20
Just nuke whats left, you didnt need that fattening che4ese anyway...lol
post #9 of 20
post #10 of 20
Told you not to rent that Garfield Movie..you know how impressionable they are!
post #11 of 20
LOL!!! I'm actually surprised they REMOVED the cheese - Sashka would've eaten all the cheese and left everything else!! That is soooooo funny....how meticulous she was! I can just imagine it...
post #12 of 20
Hysterical!

Oh, right, I'm supposed to be thinking of punishment to fit the crime.... hmmm. ..hmmm...hmmmm...

post #13 of 20


This is hilarous!
post #14 of 20
LOL! Perfectly written
post #15 of 20
muahahahahahaha!!
post #16 of 20
Thread Starter 
The criminal has struck again.

I woke up to find my bag of bagels' lifeless corpse on the living room floor (only one out of 5 bagels survived the slaughter) and my bag of bread severly wounded.

No food is safe!
I think I'll need to get a bread box. Probably one with a lock on it, just in case!!

I guess Kinah doesn't want me to have breakfast either!
post #17 of 20
Punishment! You should be thanking this kitty. She is obviously very concerned about your cholestrol and is doing everything she can to keep you from eating things that make it go up.

What a wonderful, loving kitty she is!
post #18 of 20
I like the way you think.... how many other people would have seen that?!
post #19 of 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by marie-p
The criminal has struck again.

I woke up to find my bag of bagels' lifeless corpse on the living room floor (only one out of 5 bagels survived the slaughter) and my bag of bread severly wounded.

No food is safe!
I think I'll need to get a bread box. Probably one with a lock on it, just in case!!

I guess Kinah doesn't want me to have breakfast either!
Let's hope u don't starve at the rate this is going!
post #20 of 20
Oh this is too funny!

Marie, anyone who's ever read Garfield knows not to leave a lasagna around cats unattended!! Just giving you a hard time. Kinah is such a little thief!
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