I posted this back in May and honestly, things around here do not change, so here it is again ... sorry in advance for the length.
*beep beep beep* The alarm goes off and another day has begun ... off to the kitchen I must stumble to make the morning coffee. But first, I must get out of bed.
Ever so gently, so as not to disturb Lexus, who is sleeping stretched out long and flat against my back, I turn back the covers and perform gymnastics in order to have my feet reach the floor. *sigh* Lexus lifts her head and yawns so I hold my position until she again settles. Holding my breath, I wait for her to put her head back down. My feet swing over the side of the mattress ... and Lexus, now fully awake, jumps to the floor in front of me.
Sitting on the edge of the bed, I reach for my sweatpants. Lexus jumps back up onto the bed - could it be she isn't ready to get up yet??? *sigh* No. I try to pull on my sweatpants while Lexus walks over my legs with paws that need clipping. She purrs ... I cringe as little razor-sharp claws pierce my thighs.
I stand upright and Lexus again jumps to the floor between my feet, weaving in and out, around and back through again. I reach for the wall to steady myself so I don't trip over her. Just two or three more feet and I can get to the door to open it. Lexus continues weaving, I continue holding onto the wall for support.
There, finally I am at the door. Lex raises up on the door to stretch and to hurry my progress, effectively preventing me from opening the door, then more weaving and wall-grabbing.
The door finally comes open and I begin walking through only to find myself again grabbing for the wall as Lexus darts through my feet and up my Ranch-O-Rama Bowling Alley style hallway, for all the world sounding like an entire herd of African elephants. Whoever said that cats have velvet paws ... did not own any.
The bathroom is the first stop, must address my morning needs. Lexus insists upon supervising as though I had not been successfully potty'ing for nearly 46 years, jumping up onto my lap as I do my "business". Her paw pads are like ice and her claws make holes in my skin but I cannot deny her. I finish and stand to flush ... Lexus jumps onto the seat to make 100% absolutely certain the water all goes down the hole. Once satisfied that it has, down she comes and pads not so silently to the door, meowing for me to hurry on now. Again, she raises up to stretch and blocks me from opening the door until she is done.
The door opens and yet again, I am forced to abruptly grab for the wall to keep my balance as she darts through my feet and runs noisily up the hallway towards the kitchen.
Tonka greets us as we enter the living room - braying his Good Mornings at the top of his little Blue Point lungs. A small detour to his cage for a quick chin-scritch while Lex jumps up onto the top of his cage, reaching through the bars to pat him on the head. I put her on the floor.
Finally, now a full fifteen minutes after the alarm has gone off, I make it to the kitchen. Lexus happily chases a moth that was stupid enough to fly by her face. I remove the coffee pot from the maker and begin filling it with cold water. Lex jumps onto the sink in hot pursuit of the ill-fated moth and splashes cold water all over the front of me. I put her on the floor. She again finds the moth and sniffs it, sucessfully allowing it to become stuck to her nose. She sneezes, blowing now dead moth and cat snot onto my feet. I reach for the paper towels to clean up the mess as Lexus jumps back onto the counter to bat at the roll as I tear off a sheet. Moth and cat snot are balled up into the paper towel and I turn to put same into the trash bin. Lex jumps onto the top of the bin and stands there meowing at me as if to say, "Hey! Gimme back my moth!" I put her on the floor and dispose of the towel.
Turning back, I open the cabinet to retrieve the coffee can and Lexus jumps up onto the counter and then into the cabinet. I put her on the floor. I get the coffee can and before I can close the cabinet, Lexus is back inside of it. I put her on the floor. I fill the coffee maker and push the on button. Lexus returns to sit on the counter top to watch me and again I put Lexus on the floor.
I shuffle over to the buffet where the cat food bowls are kept and retrieve two along with a can of cat food and a fork. Lexus gets inside the buffet. I put her on the floor. Lexus gets into the flatware drawer, I put her on the floor. Turning around, I reach over to place the bowls, can and fork on the counter top as Lexus weaves in and out, around and back again through my feet. I grab the counter for support. I get the can open just as Lexus jumps up onto the counter and then onto the top of my head. I put her on the floor.
One bowl is now filled and I turn to put it down for Lexus, who has jumped back up onto the counter behind me and is now happily eating the remainder of the food straight from the can. I put Lexus AND her bowl on the floor. I fill Tonka's bowl and start to walk back into the living room. Lexus runs between my feet and I nearly tumble over, almost spilling Tonka's bowl.
I shuffle (can't walk or else risk stepping on delicate cat feet) to Tonka's cage and open the door to place his bowl on the shelf. Lexus jumps to the top of his cage and reaches through the bars to again pat him on the head. Tonka hisses and swats at her while my arm is inside the cage. Lovely long, deep red furrows suddenly appear down my arm. *sigh* I place the bowl onto the shelf and take my right arm out just in time to catch Tonka before he jumps out of the cage in hot pursuit of Lexus, who I have - yes, you guessed it - put on the floor.
I close the cage door and Tonka begins eating. Lexus jumps up onto the side of the cage, hanging SpiderMan style. She reaches a dainty little Seal Point paw in to snag a pawful of Tonka's breakfast even though she has her own and has chosen to ignore it. Tonka brays his protest and I put Lex on the floor. She pads into the kitchen behind me and returns to her bowl, noisily slurping the gravy out and leaves the chunks for a treat to be enjoyed later.
I fill my coffee mug and watch the sun rise. All is as it should be with my world this morning.