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How to make the decision

post #1 of 6
Thread Starter 
Hey all-
Max seems to be in relatively good spirits but his mouth is deteriorating. The cancer has destroyed the muscles in his tongue so it is curled up and he is unable to close his mouth. He also droolls a lot. The only thing that he can eat that doesn't hurt his mouth is science diet a/d. The vet said that most painkillers will make cats go into convulsions. He did find one that seems to be ok in small doses.
Here is my dilemma. Even though he is doing some of the catty things that he's always done(scratching on his post etc) there are so many things he can't do. Also the drool has turned to lots of blood from his cancerous lesions. I think the time has come but I just don't know. I want to make sure that he doesn't suffer but it seems such a shame if there are a few things that he can do. The anticipation of the inevitable is worse for me than I think the event will be. I know this is a highly personal decision but any feedback would be highly appreciated.
I have asked a retired vet at our church to come out to the house when the time comes. I think this will be easier for max who hates going to the vet and being in the car and for us to have a friend there.
Ann D.
post #2 of 6
Dear Ann,

this is such a difficult decision...
Do you know if Max is in pain? Anyway he is probably very miserable with his drooling: cats are so neat when it comes to cleanliness. He probably hates that. I relly don't know what to tell you.

I think you are the only one that can take the decision and all I can tell is that my thoughts go out to you...


post #3 of 6
Thread Starter 
Hi Anne-Claire-
I donn't think he hurts a whole lot but cats are really good about hiding that. I think he's a bit frustrated not being able to lap water out of the bathroom faucet. But he does still take an interest in what we are doing and seems pretty bright-eyed though not,understandibly, as much as he used to be. He still jumps up on the bed and goes up the stairs ok. The painkiller has helped a bit.
I do try to wipe him up when I can, and use a non-soap cleaner designed for animals, on his coat. He can still wash his paws.
And just when I think he's really miserable and I'm ready to call the vet, He perks up the next day and I just can't do it. My husband knows it's inevitable but is dragging his feet a bit-I sometimes think the guys are more cut than we are with this sort of thing.
Ann D.
post #4 of 6
Hi Ann
I understand what you are going through completely. The vet who has been treating Max for his cancer and knows him well is the best person to give you help and guidence in knowing whether or not the time has come to say goodbye. I truly understand what a difficult time this is for you and my thoughts are with you.
post #5 of 6
Dear Ann - here is my take on this one. I believe that Max will tell you when the time is right. You will be able to look into his eyes and see what his heart is telling you. May you have peace when this time comes.
post #6 of 6
Thread Starter 
Thank you Debra-
I really appreciate the feedback and comfort from this group. I think when he absolutely refuses to eat it will be time,because after that he will only starve to death.I know that they know when it is time. A also appreciate the experience of those in this group who have been through this-some of you a number of times. I wish that nobody would have to go through this, but disease happens to most living creatures.
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