Mum diagnosed with Cancer...

Originally Posted by Beckiboo

I am very sorry, Cindy. The best way to learn more about her illness and upcoming treatment are to talk to the doctor.

Click to expand...

I totally agree!.

My mum had mouth cancer when she was in her 70's and she was in remission for a few years before she died, but it wasn't the cancer that killed her.

We have come a long way forward in medicine and treatment which thankfully is a big plus!

Sending your mum (((((healthy and calming vibes)))))) and you know were all here to lean on!

Originally Posted by CyberKitten

But that is my advice to you. Do not look just for the prognosis. Look for the people who have survived. What did they do? How did they manage? I have found a person's outlook does indeed change the outcome of the course of the neoplasm.

Click to expand...

I think this is very good advice. My mother was diagnosed with breast cancer in 1976. I didn't understand understand much since I was only 13 years old but later found out that is was serious and her prognosis was not the best. But through all of the chemo and surgery, she became cancer free for another 20 years. The second occurrence showed up near her collar bone and was taken care of with radiation and tamoxifen. I just found out yesterday that "hot spots" were showing up on the PET scan but Mom's doctors feel that she should do well with a new medication and monitoring.

Concentrate on what you can do and accept that it all is overwhelming. Find out what your mother wants because I'm sure she's feeling powerless in this and doesn't need everyone second guessing her. I have your mother in my thoughts and prayers.

Jana

I am sorry to hear the news...In May my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer and had to have her left breast removed. Those 5 weeks of finding this out to her recovery seemed like eternity. I had so many emotions at different times. I would be fine, then i'd be angry, then i'd be sad and scared..its not an easy road when you find out that a loved one is ill. Right now my mother is going through the chemo, which is very hard on her...and i hate to see her go through this. I have done alot of research, there are alot of online support places...and the doctor is very kind to talk to the family whenever...you need to have strong faith, but at the same time dont forget about yourself...being strong for others takes ALOT of energy. This isnt the end of the road...there are many paths that this illness can take....no one really knows what the outcome will be. I thought it was the end of things simply b/c i was so uneducated about cancer....Thenl i discovered that There are some amazing survival stories out there--that gave me hope--and i think you need to really reach out...grab some hope...and in the meantime- dont forget about your friends on here....If you need to talk or vent please know that you can PM anytime. Again, i'm sorry to hear this news.

P.S. It took me a while to know that its okay to have ups and downs of emotions...and your feelings are always accounted for...its okay to cry, laugh and mope...you need to "feel"...it took me a while to figure that out!!!
Good luck to you and i will be saying a prayer for you and your family.

website to check out http://lungcanceronline.org/
My email- [email protected]

Thank you so much, everyone, for your wonderful, caring and helpful responses.
You don't know JUST how helpful they really are.
It gives me hope that there are so many knowledgable people on here who have been through a similiar thing.

Coccocats: They say that its lung cancer but they also found cancer in her lymph nodes and adrenal glands..
I actually had to look up WHERE the adrenal glands were! Shows me how much I know about the human body!

The funny thing is she quit smoking 12 years ago..

I don't know enough yet other than what my stepfather has told me over the phone. I have only talked to my mum for 2 minutes this week as she is too weak and in pain.
She initally admitted to the hospital for Pancreatitis and we thought that it was clearing up as she was feeling better, they had taken out the feeding tube and taken her off the morphine and put her on demerol shots..

Then the surgeon called in a lung doctor (Sorry to the medical profession for not even knowing if there is a name for that).. He then brought in another lung doctor for a second opinion of her CT Scan.

I can identify with the seemingly clinical way things are handled but just like Cyberkitten and Valanhb said, they really have to prepare you for the bad.
Before her next test to confirm the cancer (they injected dye into her to see where it was), they told us that it didn't look good.

I was so mad at them for that..Here I was on pins and needles all week and crying on and off and then without the results, they tell us it "might" be bad...
But now I understand. What are they supposed to say? Sugarcoat it?
I really don't envy someone's position that has to give that information out daily

She isn't staying in Vancouver though. SHe is originally from Winnipeg and she has decided she wants to come back here for treatment (even though I hear they have better doctors there so this had me worried). I told her I would come there today! But she didn't want me to....She doesn't even want me to come help sort her stuff out to pack up..

I just feel helpless not knowing what KIND of cancer it is actually or as someone asked here "what stage its in" ...I am afraid I have no idea. I will know more next week when I can hopefully talk to the doctors here..Thanks for all of your support in that.
I will stick by her like glue and bother the doc with a thousand questions.

I urge those of you who are going through this and don't know alot of information yet not to attempt to gather information from the internet as you often see alot of clinical, depressing statistics that you can't possibly understand and may make things seem worse...

Cyberkitten: I read something about this 5 year plus thing but didn't really understand it..Could you explain it?

Although, what someone said here about attitude is right I think. I did read an online essay by a Harvard Prof. who was diagnosed with a fatal kind of cancer where his prognosis was only 8 months. He researched the disease thoroughly and said that he would beat this thing mainly on attitude alone, as in "I WON'T GIVE UP". And I think it was years later and he is still alive.

Thanks to all who said that NUMB was "normal"
I feel that I can scream and yell on my own time and when my mum is around, that this attitude may be more helpful. I really want to give her the impression that we will get over this.

BTW, it is radiation treatment that the Van. docs suggested to start with. I don't know if this is good or bad..Is it better or lesser of a hard treatment on your body? (if that makes sense)...

Thanks again all, I will keep you updated as the week goes on.. I may not learn more about the specifics until next week. I am afraid to ask but its something I have to do...

Thanks again so so so much.
Hugs to all of you.

Cin, radiation is much less invasive and much easier for the body to deal with than chemo. Radiation is directed at specific areas where the cancer is (Mom said after her radiation treatments she felt like she had a sunburn), whereas chemo is directed at the entire body. Chemo treatments do work, but along with the cancer cells it also kills healthy cells which is where most of the side-effects (i.e. losing hair, losing all sense of taste because tastebuds are very sensitive cells, etc.) come from.

Thanks for the quick answer, Heidi

Can I ask if your mum went into the hospital to have this? I feel stupid but is it a pill or is it like an xray machine that they direct at you?

I am glad to hear its the least invasive. Hopefully that will be the only one she has to endure.

Cheers
Cin

I sure do hope that's the only treatment required too!

The radiation treatment that Mom got was an outpatient procedure. I don't remember how often, if it was once or twice a week, but the course I remember was for about 6 weeks. It was just like going to a regular doctor's appointment, I think the treatment took between 1/2 hour and an hour. (Forgive the vagueness, this was probably 8-9 years ago when she had radiation.) It is more like an x-ray machine that they direct at specific points. Mom was thrilled because they had to tattoo the points of direction on her - literally tiny little dots. But she thought it was so cool to tell people that she had a tattoo now! LOL (Silly memory, I hadn't thought of that in a long time. Mom was employed at a church, so she wasn't the tattoo type at all!)

My mom preferred the radiation treatment to the chemo. When she had chemo she was horribly ill for days afterwards. With the radiation treatment, she was actually living alone and we just helped with the driving every once in awhile.

Your mother's cancer is more complicated so I don't know how extensive the treatment will be but the radiation treatment is definitely easier than the chemo.

Jana

My mom had both - a decision we made after a spot was found on her lung (same side as the breast with cancer). First she had a lumpectomy, then radiation, then chemo...gave it both barrels!

Thanks Heidi and Jana...

Hopefully it won't be too hard on her. I have heard all that horrible stuff about chemo.
The thing that worries me is that the lymph nodes are the glands that protect AGAINST disease (if I am stating that right) so if they have cancer in them, that doesn't sound great to me..

I will have to wait and see I guess what the doctors say...

Originally Posted by Pat & Alix

My mom had both - a decision we made after a spot was found on her lung (same side as the breast with cancer). First she had a lumpectomy, then radiation, then chemo...gave it both barrels!

Click to expand...

Pat, is your mother well now?

She just had a mammogram and all was clear. It's just been a year though, and this was her second time having a cancer - 11 years ago she had uterine cancer (very early stage). She's still having some fatigue issues, but overall is doing very, very well.

That is so GOOD to hear.

Good thoughts for her continued strength...

I was the one who asked what stage she was in since it matters to what degree the treatments will be needed and also as to their treatment plan for her.

In addition to what I said in my previous post above, when my sister had her radiation treatments they fitted her with a wired mesh type thing and cut holes where the radiation is going to be on her. This was instead of marking the body with markers (that DO NOT go away, they're permanent).

The mesh face mask was put over her and they poured a warm substance over her face to have the mask molded into her face shape. Then each treatment she was to put the mask on, with a hole also cut out over the nose only, and they bolted the mask to the table she lied on. This made her feel extremely nervous to have a mask over her face then to have her mask bolted to the table. It's a very uncomfortable sensation to know you're helpless and confined.

She's finished with her radiation, which caused dry eyes, skin dry and sunburned feeling, and some hair loss which she may lose more before it growing back. Though she does have hair left, she didn't go completely bald.

I'm so sorry to hear about this. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. They are coming out with so many new treatments now. I hope one of them will work well for your mother.

Originally Posted by Sooz123

Despite the medical prognosis, my belief is that it can be fought by strength of spirit... do your best to keep the fire of hope in her and never let her give up.

Click to expand...

I completely agree. Your mother and family are in my thoughts and prayers during this difficult time. Don't worry about feeling numb right now....you will go through a million different emotions during this time, all of which are completely normal.

What matters is that you love your mother and she has the support of a loving family

.

My prayers are with you, your mother and your family. My mother had breast cancer. I described it as being swept up on the Cancer roller coaster. We were all numb for quite a while after the first diagnosis, then, as they got into treatment options, we were just pulled along for the ride, on a constant stream of appointments, consultations, decisions, services, and issues.

The one thing I found was that you can always ask for more information. They seem very busy at the hospital (and they are) but I found that the folks in oncology are outstandingly caring and helpful. Any questions we had, they just bent over backwards to help. And that was a great comfort to all of us.

I also found that they would tell us exactly what we needed to know - and let us lead the way in how much detailed information we wanted. They didn't sugar coat anything, but they also knew that we couldn't absorb a lot of information, and would ask when we needed to clarify stuff.

We all made sure that Mom had at least one person with her at every appointment, because she was pretty much in shock over it all, and needed someone else to remember what she had been told.

In addition to her regular doctor's appointments, and her chemo, she had a nutritionist, a pharmacist, and a therapist. All because she mentioned something in passing that was bothering her. And the nurses immediately picked up on her comments, and signed her up with whatever she needed. So be aware that there is a huge range of support service available, beyond the basic treatment.

I also signed up for peer support through another agency, so I had someone else to talk to, just about how I was feeling. They "matched" me with a peer counsellor who had been in a similar situation. That was a wonderful help too.

Hope everything goes well for your mum.

what Sammie5 said about a cancer roller-coaster. My sister was diagnosed with colon-cancer about a year and a half ago and underwent an aggressive treatment with chemo and radiation. She didn't lose all her hair, although it did thin out considerably. So far her check-ups this year have been . I hope it goes as well for your mum.

Cindy

Survival rate is the measure of the number of people who develop cancer and survive over a period of time. Scientists commonly use five-year survival as the standard statistic for defining when a cancer has been successfully treated.

The five-year survival rate includes anyone who is living five years after a cancer diagnosis. This includes those who are cured, those in remission and those who still have cancer and are undergoing treatment. For example, when cervical cancer is detected early (something I can relate to!), the five-year survival rate is 92 percent, meaning that 92 percent of all cervical cancer patients live at least five years after diagnosis if the cancer is detected early.

The overall five-year survival rate measures everyone who has ever been diagnosed with a particular cancer equally. Mind you, this can lead to distorted stats. (It's be better if the stat came from people with similar age, demographics, etc but I digress).

It is just a stat that has been used by oncologists and scientists for the better half of the 20th and this century in determining cancer survival but it's not without its pitfalls. Tupically, if a person lives past five years with the disease and it is in remission, s/he is considered cured. Five years does not reflect the advances in cancer research - so really, they should not be seen as a predictor in an individual situation but as an overall stat.

Gawd, I hope this does not confuse you!!

you are correct about Vancouver tho there are good docs in Winnipeg. You can't convince her to stay in Vancouver? or would she be happier in Winnipeg?

Originally Posted by Loveysmummy

Hi all,
I generally don't post these sort of notices.
But today, I learned that my mum has been diagnosed with cancer in her lungs, adrenal glands, and lymph nodes.

She is in Vancouver at the moment and is coming back here to start treatment next week. She is still in the hospital at this point.

All of this week, we have been awaiting some sort of news as they have been doing numerous tests.
There are no tests left to be done.

I don't know the prognosis of this type of disease and have never faced it. My heart goes out to all of you who have had to face this horrible thing.

Does anyone have any advice or insights on this sort of cancer?

I am beside myself but oddly after hearing this news today, I feel ABSOLUTELY NUMB.

IS this normal?

Tx for any wishes and good thoughts.

Cheers
CIn

Click to expand...

Cin I lost my Mom to cancer 7 year ago BUT she was not diagnosed till she was too far along! ALL I can say is PRAY! No matter what else you do PRAY and BELEIVE she will be OK! Also spend a much time with her as you are able! No matter if or not she makes it, be with her! You will NEVER be sorry!

Also there are places to ask for Prayers, on the internet. Why not search for them and put your Mom's name on them for many to Pray for! I wish you the best! Tell her to WIN this battle for MY Mom who did not!