Now I'm ready (long...sorry)

eilcon

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Hey everybody,
I originally posted about this on Fri., but asked one of the mods to delete the thread because I thought I was overreacting. Now that I've had a few days to think about things, I'm still fuming, but thinking more rationally.

Here's the situation: I'm in the process of applying to become a volunteer chaplain for a local police department. Currently, the department is served
by a team of chaplains (all ordained ministers from various religious denominations and all men.) I'm Catholic and obviously not ordained, but since I have the five years required ministry experience and am professed member of a religious order, am still qualified under the team's guidelines.
Initially, I was strongly encouraged to apply for the team. (This is something I feel very strongly about doing). Things were moving along pretty well until last Fri. when the team leader called to say the executive committee, who will made the final decision, had some concerns. The first is my current fulltime job - writing for a Catholic newspaper. They feel that if the officers learn I'm with the media, they'll feel like they can't trust me because my only concern will be getting a story. I've tried explainig to them that my job is not like that of reporter for a regular newspaper, but haven't been able to convince them so far.

Now, the issue of me not being ordained has also surfaced - something about confidentiality if an officer, or another individua, confesses something to me. Catholic priests (and I'm thinking other ordained ministers) are obliged to keep anything revealed to them in the context of a confession, confidential. I'm not bound by that, so have been told they need to look into the "legalities" of how this might work.

If my application goes through, I'll be the first woman to serve on the team
in many years. I've already spoken to several people about this who seem to think maybe the executive committee doesn't really want a women to join the team and is trying to throw some obstacles my way in the hopes that I'll withdraw my application. I hate to think this way, but the thought has crossed my mind.

At this point, I'm just waiting to see what happens next. I'm ready to fight for this if I have to. Again, this is something I feel very strongly about and I know there is need for female chaplain. Basically, just asking for some good vibes from all of you. Thanks for listening.
 

ricalynn

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Eileen, major good vibes (and prayers, ya) coming your way from my corner! Praying that it's simply ignorance of your training that is keeping the exec committee from going ahead with this. I know there are women in that department that need you!
 

ugaimes

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Eileen, I think it is SO wonderful what you are doing and you have my full support, as well as tons of vibes and prayers coming your way {{{{}}}}.

Unfortunately, though I am a huge fan of law enforcement, many offices tend to be a "good old boys club" (many, but certainly not all), so that may be what you're encountering here. I certainly hope that they can look past whatever is holding them back (I understand how confidentiality can be an issue for them, as it is for anyone dealing with possible confidentiality leaks) and realize that they have an amazing candidate for chaplain right at their feet!
 
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eilcon

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Thanks Erica and Amy for your support. Besides serving the officers, I've also learned there's a real need for someone to be available for the wives, along with female victims and suspects. Will keep you posted!
 

ugaimes

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Originally Posted by eilcon

Besides serving the officers, I've also learned there's a real need for someone to be available for the wives, along with female victims and suspects. Will keep you posted!
Bingo! That is so vital and needed everywhere! I really hope you are able to provide that support for them
 

rosehawke

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Oh, good grief! The last time I checked a Catholic newspaper is not exactly the Star you know!

Some people ...

Good luck with it, sometimes you just have to keep pegging away and jumping each obstacle as it's presented.

Cindy
 

catsknowme

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I'm sending prayers for your success in this, Eilcon! I think that a woman chaplain will be best suited to the needs of the children as well as the wives & women victims. The confidentiality issue is a legitimate one, however, since we all know how ruthless lawyers are .I hope that there is some way that you could get the same confidentiality protections as a "regulary ordained" person, or a doctor or lawyer - how awful to be put on the stand and asked to disclose a confidence! Couldn't you be protected since you would be acting as an agent of the Church? I know that employees and agents of attorneys are protected by the attorney/client confidentiality privelege; it should be the same for you, maybe your priest or state bar association could tell you if it can be done, & how - for the sake of those who will need your counsel & comfort in the future, there's gotta be a way! Please keep us posted!
 

coolcat

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Eileen...I´m Catholic too...
and I believe so strong in God..
IMO I think you must to do what you want to do...
I believe too the equal rights for Women and Men should be in everywhere....

I´m so sure you can find a good way to develop you faith and work in where you feel realizate...

Of course you can count with my best wishes and prayers to reach this goal!

Good Luck and keep us updating..
 
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eilcon

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Awww, thanks you guys for all the good vibes and support. You're the best!!!
 
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eilcon

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Just got a call from the coordinator of the police chaplain team. He was very concerned to learn that I had been seeking some opinions about this on my own from a few officers I know, one of whom is the highest ranking female in the department. She has offered her assistance if need be, but I've told her it's not necessary for now and asked that she keep our conversations confidential, which she is willing to do. I only contacted her to get her opinion, nothing else. Anyway the coordinator has requested that I stop discussing this with other people and let him handle things because there are some issues involved that he can't discuss for now. This is getting way more complicated than it needs to be, IMO. He's kind of got worried. Anyway, please keep the good vibes coming. Thanks to all of you!
 

rockcat

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Originally Posted by eilcon

Just got a call from the coordinator of the police chaplain team. He was very concerned to learn that I had been seeking some opinions about this on my own from a few officers I know, one of whom is the highest ranking female in the department. She has offered her assistance if need be, but I've told her it's not necessary for now and asked that she keep our conversations confidential, which she is willing to do. I only contacted her to get her opinion, nothing else. Anyway the coordinator has requested that I stop discussing this with other people and let him handle things because there are some issues involved that he can't discuss for now. This is getting way more complicated than it needs to be, IMO. He's kind of got worried. Anyway, please keep the good vibes coming. Thanks to all of you!
Hmmm...all men so far, excuses for you not to join the team (being ordained all of a sudden became an issue), and now they want to keep it quiet. Kinda makes one get the impression they like their "boy's only" club.
 

tari

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Originally Posted by Rockcat

Hmmm...all men so far, excuses for you not to join the team (being ordained all of a sudden became an issue), and now they want to keep it quiet. Kinda makes one get the impression they like their "boy's only" club.
That was my thought exactly.

Eileen, what you're doing is just wonderful. I wish you the very best of luck and am sending lots of prayers and good vibes your way!
 
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eilcon

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Originally Posted by Tari

That was my thought exactly.

Eileen, what you're doing is just wonderful. I wish you the very best of luck and am sending lots of prayers and good vibes your way!
Thank you so much. That really means a lot. Have to admit all the excuses they've been making has me thinking the same thing.
 

rockcat

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My prayers are with you, too. I have also asked God to help these men look to Him for the answer.
 

cyberkitten

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I'm in Canada but the only US Catholic newspaper I care for the National Catholic Reporter. I also know what it's like to be a woman in what some see as a man's domain (tho there are now so many more women in medicine!, especially in my field.) However, it was not that way when I started and I also found politics to be the same way.

I actually at one time wondered about the Priesthood - I am one of those infamous Sacred Heart grads - (high school).
I really hope you obtain this position. I think they are simply putting up roadblocks because you are a woman!! That's unfair and not very Christian either. Did you try quoting them Galations 3:28? <g>

Good luck and I'll say a few prayers for you!
 

yosemite

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Originally Posted by eilcon

Just got a call from the coordinator of the police chaplain team. He was very concerned to learn that I had been seeking some opinions about this on my own from a few officers I know, one of whom is the highest ranking female in the department. She has offered her assistance if need be, but I've told her it's not necessary for now and asked that she keep our conversations confidential, which she is willing to do. I only contacted her to get her opinion, nothing else. Anyway the coordinator has requested that I stop discussing this with other people and let him handle things because there are some issues involved that he can't discuss for now. This is getting way more complicated than it needs to be, IMO. He's kind of got worried. Anyway, please keep the good vibes coming. Thanks to all of you!
I'm curious as to how he learned you were speaking with those folks if you had asked them to keep your conversations confidential!

Confidentiality is a biggie here and quite honestly I would be concerned about telling something to someone who was not protected for confidentiality whether male OR female.
 
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eilcon

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Originally Posted by Yosemite

I'm curious as to how he learned you were speaking with those folks if you had asked them to keep your conversations confidential!

Confidentiality is a biggie here and quite honestly I would be concerned about telling something to someone who was not protected for confidentiality whether male OR female.
I totally agree! Sorry I wasn't more clear (was kind of upset at the time I posted). The female officer actually suggested I tell the coordinator she'd be willing to assist if necessary, so I did. He called after I emailed him with her offer.

(reflects how I'm feeling right now!)
 

catsknowme

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I'm praying that the hearts of the head chaplain, and the rest of the dept., be inclined for you to join them asap, and that they be given the wisdom to realize solutions to any stumbling blocks that may be in the way. I surely hope that the female officer did not intentionally reveal your conversations with her but maybe that is her way up the political ladder, after all, she's bucking the "good ol' boy" system, too. Was she oblivious to the problems that it would have caused when she made the head chaplain aware of the fact that you had been asking opinions?
 
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