Need Opinion!

About three weeks ago I received two 8-year-old persian calico cats. Popcorn is very affectionate. MS. Skeeter is extremely shy and after a few gentle touches she runs and hides in the dark. I wrote the private seller (from our area) if she would be willing to take back the cat. She breeds cats for show and she sold us two "retired" breeders. I wrote that I feel bad about not being able to give equal attention and feel that if I am going to give attention I would like it to be mutual. Not that I don't like MS. Skeeter. Even with exrta effort she seems upset and non responsive to affection. Did I do alright in asking the seller if she would consider taking her back. Even letting her keep the $70.00. I told her the money was not the issue. Rather the welfare of the cat?

How was Ms Skeeter at the breeders house?

I don't recall exactly what they said. But I believe she was not as enthusiastic. To be quite honest, I was hoping she would be touchable and stuff. But she isn't. She is no fun at all and I don't want her just lying around if I can't do something with her.

Perhaps give her some more time it might take her a bit longer to come out of her shell. Don't give up on her yet.

Since your question is about a breeder's cat, I'll move this to the Breeder's Corner where, like Sam, they can give you advice from a breeder's perspective.

Personally, I don't think you've given little Ms. Skeeter enough time to become acclimated to the routines and normal habits of your home. Don't try to seek her out, let her come to you. She may just need the extra time to get used to your family, your habits and her new surroundings. Ignore her and it is my bet that she will come around when she is ready.

~gf~

I agree that it can and usually does take more than three weeks to get used to a new home. Especially with an older cat, who has become more used to their routine at their home. And now all of a sudden they have to adapt to a new one. Give her some time, she will come out of her shell. she may not be a lap cat but she will want attention and such...

my cat hated me when we firdt got her and wold do nothing but hide under the bed. after lots of love (and tuna) she has come arond and is much more loving and faithful than even our dog.

give her a chance and work with her and you will be rewarded with a loving. greatful pet.

I had the same problem with the Norwegian female I bought. She hid under the couch and would not come out if anyone was around. Only to eat and potty after everyone went to bed at nite. That went on for about a month. I left her alone. She finally figured out that I was the feeder and started coming around me more often. I would always talk sweet to her and touch her as often as I could. I'ld give her a special can of cat food, where the other cats all eat dry. That made her feel special. She finally started getting in my bed at nite and cuddling by my feet and coming for pettings. She still is not a lap cat but she will play and I know she loves me. I would not give up on your kitty. It takes time for an older cat to aclimate to new surroundings. I would just give her lots of special treatment.

Our Simba was the same. He was 6 months old and the breeder had kept him mostly in a cage I believe. He was a cross Siamese/Himalayan and was not as sought after as her pedigree cats, thus being 6 months old and needing a home.

He hid behind our headboard for 4 full weeks and would not come out if we were anywhere in the room except on top of the bed (with no arms or feet showing over the side). At 4 weeks I accidentally touched his head as he was scooting back under the bed and he stopped short. I gently talked to him and gently caressed his head and when he started to relax, I lifted him on the bed with me all the while talking and cooing to him. He heard someone come up the stairs and ran back in hiding. After that, for the rest of the weekend he would come out for me but only if I was alone. By the end of the week he would let my daughter and husband pet him if I was with them. At the end of the 5th week, I opened the bedroom door to let him explore the house. It took another week before he ventured down to the lower level family room.

Then - he was the most affectionate, loving cat we ever had bar none. He loved for us to carry him around in our arms upside down just like a human baby - he HAD to sit on my lap whenever I was using the bathroom and he ALWAYS lay on my lap or our daughter's lap and occasionally my husband's (if Jen and I weren't sitting or around) when we were watching TV.

At one point about 3 weeks in, my husband said we had to take him back to the breeder and I begged for just a bit more time because the folks on this site told me to be patient.

Am I ever glad we didn't take him back. He was exceptional.

I also think you should give her more time to acclimate to her new home. Do not rush her. Talk to her gently, sing to her, but don't try to pet her if she is not coming to you. Some cats like to be petted on the floor and not picked up. Not all cats are lapcats. None of my three are, but they all love to be petted on their own conditions. One of them prefers to lie beside my PC, my left hand just touching her - then she will purr and crumble and if I stop she looks at me and says "mmm?". But she never enjoys sitting on my lap.

It might also be something between the two cats. Do you know who is the dominant one? You might try to be alone with the fragile one in a room without the other one present. She may feel more secure then, even if they generally seem to be good friends.