Strict, Unbending Rules for Dealing w/Strays :)

leesali

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1. Stray cats will not be fed.

2. Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food.

3. Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food moistened

with a little milk.

4. Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food moistened

with warm milk,

yummy treats and leftover fish scraps.

5. Stray cats will not be encouraged to make this house their permanent

residence.

6. Stray cats will not be petted, played with or picked up and cuddled

unnecessarily.

7. Stray cats that are petted, played with, picked up and cuddled will

absolutely not be given a name.

8. Stray cats with or without a name will not be allowed inside the

house at any time.

9. Stray cats will not be allowed inside the house except at certain

times.

10. Stray cats will not be allowed inside the house except on days

ending in "y".

11. Stray cats allowed inside will not be permitted to jump up on or

sharpen their claws on the furniture.

12. Stray cats will not be permitted to jump up on, or sharpen claws on

the really good furniture.

13. Stray cats will be permitted on all furniture but must sharpen claws



on new $114.99 sisal-rope cat-scratching post with three perches.

14. Stray cats will answer the call of nature outdoors in the sand.

15. Stray cats will answer the call of nature in the three-piece,

high-impact plastic tray filled with Fresh'n'Sweet kitty litter.

16. Stray cats will answer the call of nature in the hooded litter pan

with a three-panel privacy screen and plenty of head room.

17. Stray cats will sleep outside.

18. Stray cats will sleep in the garage.

19. Stray cats will sleep in the house.

20. Stray cats will sleep in a cardboard box lined with an old blanket.

21. Stray cats will sleep in the special Kitty-Komfort-Bed with

non-allergenic lambs wool pillow.

22. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed.

23. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed, except at the

foot.

24. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed under the covers.



25. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed under the covers

except at the foot.

26. Stray cats will not play on the desk.

27. Stray cats will not play on the desk near the computer.

28. Stray cats are forbidden to walk on the computer keyboard on the

desk when the human is using it.
 

eburgess

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Sounds like my mom's pet rules. She went from no cats ever because she "doesn't like them" to having 2. Turns out my Dad has a bigger problem with cats then my mom does, but what Mom says goes. hahaha
 
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