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need answers ASAP - bullying or not? - Page 2

post #31 of 39
Thread Starter 
I had my talk with HR. I was instructed to have an impromptu meeting with the employee who's practices I had an opinion about on my BLOG and make sure that we can get over this. I was then instructed to ask him if he knew how we could stop the noise, and go from there. HR told me they would speak to my immediate manager and the IT director regarding the noise, b/c they understood that when you're in my profession, quietness is key to concentration (I'm an application developer). I'll post more after I talk to the employee, and if I notice a change in the environment.
post #32 of 39
Just wondering how this came out. I have to agree with all Hissy said.
post #33 of 39
Thread Starter 
I spoke with the guy I had to talk to this morning and all went well. He stated that he wasn't holding a grudge due to the BLOG incident, and that he was wondering what has been up with me. So it was a communication problem and a misunderstanding between the two of us. I explained to him my thought process when I wrote the BLOG, and that lead to other topics; but that cleared some things up. He told me others at work had been informed of the BLOG, and he told them to not get involved and to stay away. He understood that my personal space was being invaded and that was not appropriate. He also told me that others do not have an issue with me. When I questioned the noise issue, he said he didn't know of a noise problem or didn't recognize one, and if there was noise, he didn't think it was directed towards me. However, I tend to disagree with that comment (the fact that there is a noise problem). Even if the noise isn't directed towards me, there's still a problem.

After our conversation, I followed up with HR (via an e-mail as asked). I asked them if they had a chance to talk to the managers regarding the noise issue, as I am not convinced the issue will go away unless that is done. I'll just have to wait and find out on this one. However, I must admit, I feel like I dropped a huge weight off my shoulders, now that I got these feelings off my chest.
post #34 of 39
Glad you went to the HR - it oftentimes help to get their unbiased opinion - since presumbably they know the parties involved.

Definately developers need to be able to concentrate!
post #35 of 39
Sounds like it is on its' way to getting better. Hope the peace and quiet come next.
post #36 of 39
We recently had a similar problem in our office, sparked by a series of promotions and the fact that everybody thinks they know what everyone else is doing... when they really don't.

A girl got promoted that some people didn't like and/or thought deserved the job... and got promoted to be over those very people. They tormented her in quiet ways (verbally bashing her loud enough for her to hear, messing with things in her office, refusing to turn their work in to her)... until she was so stressed she made herself talk to a higher up. It snowballed from there, to pinpoint the person they believed to be the instigator, and after a lengthy investigation including depositions by several workers, they gave him a slap on the wrist.

The point is, it's a hard thing to discipline for because it's not exactly harrassment, they call it "conduct unbecoming..." and HR depts will tend to want one really bad act to discipline than try swatting flies. The best advice is to get management to stop the current behavior and then find a way to ease the social tensions so it doesn't start up again even if it means taking a hit to your pride. But, it's going to be a hard road. I'm not saying you should, but if it were me I'd be tempted to look for another job to start fresh in, or try getting transferred to a different department at the same company. I was in a similar position as slacker-girl at one of my first jobs... only it was a small company and my boss was the one doing it. It got so bad after two years that I lost it, wrote a lengthy letter of resignation and walked.
post #37 of 39
What's wrong with me? I skipped right over your post about talking to him apparently!

Good job! Finding a way to ease tensions personally instead of trying to involve HR should fix it. Hope things settle down now and you can enjoy your workplace again!!
post #38 of 39
Are they being nicer to you today? I hope so.
post #39 of 39
Thread Starter 
Not any nicer at all. If anything, my assumption or feeling that the guy I talked to about the noise was lying, well, I was right. Friday they just went over the line. First off, I heard him mention to another employee something I said when we had our private discussion. Then, someone came over to his desk and started taking papers and dropping them on his desk and someone was slamming their pen against the metal lining on top of his cubicle and he was slamming his pen against his desk. By the time I got out of there on Friday, I just wanted to die. Seriously. I sent another e-mail to the HR lead I spoke with (she was out of the office) and explained that things were getting even more carried away now.

So according to HR's original statement to me, "if you talk to him, at least you can say that you tried and that you did what you could", I did try, and with no success to report. However, hopefully they'll help me out with this and maybe bring him in and do more than just smack him on his hand. I'd like them to talk to him, our IT director, and his employer. I'd also like HR to talk to the other person behind all of this as well, and state that their job is at risk if this continues. Maybe then these two can relay this information and tell others to stop.

I've been at this place for seven years, almost 8 now, and I shouldn't be the one to have to leave. Then again, wouldn't I have a case against the company b/c I was forced to leave and I didn't leave b/c I wanted to?
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