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Why Men are happier...

post #1 of 14
Thread Starter 
My email is full of it today...

Why ARE Men Happier?
Men Are Just Happier People - - What do you expect from such simple
Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take
care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white
T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car
mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas
station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to
stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more
Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental $100. People
never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes
don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. Phone conversations are over
in 30
seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your
own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more
than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are
unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle
lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and
You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big
hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes - one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice
concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25
No wonder men are happier
Send this to the women who can handle it and to the men who will enjoy
post #2 of 14
Amen, Fran!!!!! Guys will never know how good they have it!!!
post #3 of 14
This gave me a good laugh! Thanks for sharing!
post #4 of 14
my Husband sent me that one too.

He also sent me this one -


* Airplanes usually kill you quickly; a woman takes her time.

* Airplanes can be turned on by a flick of a switch.

* Airplanes don't get mad if you do a "touch and go."

* Airplanes don't object to a pre-flight inspection.

* Airplanes come with a manual to explain their operation.

* Airplanes have strict weight and balance limitations.

* Airplanes can be flown at any time of the month.

* Airplanes don't come with in-laws.

* Airplanes don't care about how many other airplanes you've flow before.

* Airplanes and pilots both arrive at the same time.

* Airplanes don't mind if you look at other airplanes.

* Airplanes don't mind if you buy airplane magazines.

* Airplanes expect to be tied down.

* Airplanes don't comment on your piloting skills.

* Airplanes don't whine unless something is really wrong.

* However, when airplanes go quiet, just like women, it's usually not good.

to which i replied with -

Why Women Prefer Shoes To Men.

*You can walk all over shoes and they never complain.

*You can have 50 pairs at the same time and none of them get jelous.

*When you get sick of a pair you can throw them out and get new one's.

*You can wear shoes to bed without getting pregnant.

*Shoes always make you feel beautiful.

*Shoes make you feel tall thin and gorgeous but marriage makes you short fat and ugly.

*a chunky heel is a good heel.

*You can try out a jogger, italian, french and swedish all in one hour.

*You can take a shoe back if you decide it's not what you wnated after all.

*A shoe with spots is a fashion statment.

*square heels are trendy.

*A cheap shoe isn't always a bad shoe.

*You can lend your shoe's out to friends.

*Mothers love shoes as much as you do.

*Mothers don't mind if you bring home a few pairs of shoes in one day.

*Mothers still worry if their Husbands like your shoes and want to try them on!

That got him miffed!


post #5 of 14
And don't any man say they don't have it easy!!!
post #6 of 14
they're great!

Felicia, you gave a good fight there! Plus it was very funny too!
post #7 of 14
post #8 of 14
Thankyou Sar and Huggles,

i do that to him every time he sends me a email like that, i go through every line and think of a way to change it to make women look good

he thinks it's funny too but teases me about it


post #9 of 14
post #10 of 14
Oh those are good! Definintely ones I'll forward on to Jerry!
post #11 of 14
That´s NOT TRUE Frannie!!!.......

.. ..J.K.
post #12 of 14
Excellent stuff! hehe Oh how it rings true?
post #13 of 14
Funny stuff. Here's another good one.


Things You'll Never Hear A Man Say

Here honey, you use the remote.

You know, I'd like to see her again, but her breasts are just too big.

Ooh, Ben Afflick AND Brad Pitt? That's one movie I gotta see!

While I'm up, can I get you anything?

Honey since we don't have anything else planned, will you go to the wallpaper store with me?

Why don't you go to the mall with me and help me pick out a pair of shoes?

Aww, forget Monday night football, Let's watch the Soap's Channel.

Hey let me hold your purse while you try that on.

We never talk anymore
post #14 of 14
Haha, those are funny!
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