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C'mon Folks...

post #1 of 15
Thread Starter 
Ok..I think there's something that is long past due to be said here.
Over the past while we've lost members here who have taken offence or been hurt by percieved slights from other members. This is ridiculous.

If someone leaves for a time for life pressures or whatever,that's one thing,but to take off because so-and-so doesn't like me is just silly. So what? If someone replys to your thread in a way you don't like..IGNORE them and go on talking to someone else. If "X" doesn't agree with you;SO WHAT?? Maybe Y,Z and K do. Talk to them.

I've seen posted on here "I was AFRAID to post". Why?? Do you think that someone will track you down and beat you up?? I don't think there's a Hit List being created.

If someone disagrees with me on any given subject nobody curls up and dies. I might even be wrong once in awhile..can happen. Maybe I get a chance to learn something. But if someone decides they just don't like me...BIG STINKIN' DEAL!!!! I sure don't know anyone here personally enough to really understand what their life is about. Nor do any of you..except Barb..know me.

We're all taking stuff WAAAAAY too personal...let's knock it off.

For those who are leaving to tend to personal problems..I do sincerely hope that things will soon get better for you. If I can help,let me know. But do come back,even if just occasionally.

Now LIGHTEN UP PEOPLE and let's get back to enjoying the site.
post #2 of 15
VERY WELL PUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
post #3 of 15
I'd like to think Hissy, or some of the others who've left aren't shallow enough to leave just because 'someone doesn't like them'. I think the issue goes deeper than that. The main reason for people to come to this board is the welfare of cats,and to discuss their care and how they affect our lives. It really bugs some of us when it seems people are being irresponsible in regards to their pets welfare. Hissy has had to deal with irresponsible pet owners on a constant basis as people dump them off at her place all the time. She's frustrated by it in real life, as well as on here. Please don't lump her in a category of childishness, she isn't off sulking because someone stepped on her toes.
post #4 of 15
I agree with Kittyfoot. Although in MOST situations I think we act like adults around here! I will be the first to admit I've voiced my opinion on a lot of "debatable" subjects lately. I was one of those who used to not post for fear of being picked on, but I decided that I should be able to voice my beliefs and opinions here. And sometimes people agree, other times, nobody does. But I survive! And I've made quite a few nice friends here. You know who you are
Lets just try to get along and try respect each other like we would want to be respected. I love it around here, and I would hate to see people keep on dropping out. We all seem to get along so well, but then one subject will come up and everything all goes to h*ll.
No more venting, just wanted to share my feelings ( Like I don't enough already ) with everyone. God Bless us ALL.
post #5 of 15
I agree with bits and pieces. People are too sensitive.

Here's a perfect example that is going to cause some flaming, but if none of us take this personal, then it shouldn't be a problem, should it? What I was referring to when I posted in MAs thread about her posting things I didn't have the courage to, was in the thread about us donating money to the max fund. And you know what? MA got flamed HUGELY for her post. I didn't say anything because I knew that it would be taken 'personally' and nastiness was going to insue. I know from talking to my other friends that they felt the same way and were also afraid of the fall out to say what they were thinking. If you go back and look at the thread now, it's nasty but nowhere as nasty as it once was, because people edited thier posts. It was a doozy in it's orginal form folks. That thread had repercussions that are still being felt.

I don't think people leave because 'someone doesn't like me!!!!' They leave because they get fed up. There's a difference.
post #6 of 15
No one should be afraid to express themselves, and I doubt Mary Anne is. She's a very strong, caring, loving woman with a lot on her plate, and has become frustrated with some things here. She isnt being childish, just taking care of herself...something long overdue and well deserved.

As for anyone else who may have left over hurt feelings, life is full of people who may not think or live like you do.
Try not to force your opinions on others, just agree to disagree.
post #7 of 15
Thread Starter 
Melissa...please go back and re-read my post...nobody's lumping Hissy anywheres. Hissy is a fine person with a fine mind that she can make up for herself. If she needs to do other things,that is her business. We will all miss her.

AP...ok,case in point...if someone posts on here about a cause they truly believe in why does anyone feel the need to disparage them? If you do not want to take part...pass on to another issue. There is absoloutely no need for all this acrimony and "choosing sides". The last I saw this thread was open to anyone who cares to post. What was gained by all the argument and infighting?

Now if someone decides they don't like me on here..<<SHRUG>> tough. It doesn't really matter now,does it? If they decide to PM me or email...that's what the delete button is for.

Incidentally..I've never seen anyone here abusing their pets.
post #8 of 15
KF, I was simply defending my post about being afraid to post something. Not every case is cut and dried. I've never been rude to anyone on this board, and either has MA. As for that case in point, I don't feel that MA disparaged anyone. I didn't talk about any acrimony or choosing sides.

What did you mean when you said 'The last I saw this thread was open to anyone who cares to post. What was gained by all the argument and infighting?' I'm not sure what that means, in terms of my post. I don't think anything I said was flaming. I pointed out a time when I was afraid to post. No one on here has to ever post anything, but on the same token, aren't we allowed to post our feelings, if done respectfully, even if they are at odds with how someone else feels? That was all I was saying. Not everyone is respectful, and I'm not speaking for everyone, but I've never said anything on here that I've felt guilty about later. And as for the case in point, I don't MA has ever said anything to ever deserved to be flamed.
post #9 of 15
Thread Starter 
AP..sorry,apparently I wasn't clear..I was not referring to your personal post there. I was basically using the example that you supplied..the Max thread. There were a lot of hard feelings stemming from that thread and in MHO a lot of needless foolishness. Nobody in particular in mind.

We are all different people here. Each has his or her own feelings and viewpoint on any given subject at any given time. To me and I'm sure to many others we all have something to give here. Each of us has the right to be listened to and be respected. I can tell folks what I do with my two cats but I also realize that it will not work for everyone. I greatly admire those of us who have lots of expertise with cat rescues,etc. But I cannot apply all of the things they so routinely do to my own situation. I do the best I can.

I enjoy the posts by the catshow folks...and if I grin it's because I'm pleased how proud they are of their cats. I have no interest in getting involved in them,but I love my boys every bit as much.

But twice now there has been an assumption that I am in some way disparaging Hissy. Why??? The lady has my respect for the work she does as do many others here. I don't know her personally,I wish I did..except when she's rescuing skunks. Perhaps we are all guilty of putting too much pressure on her by making her the "go-to" lady for everything. I sincerely do hope that things break in her favor for a change. She's sure been having a bad run of luck lately. But for that matter so have I. I'll deal with it and move on. If CS interferes I'll leave until such a time I can come back. I won't be heartbroken if nobody notices. It's called reality and happens to everyone. Hopefully at some point in the NEAR future MA will be able to come back and say things are going good for her.

Have we cleared up this point?

Anybody else want a swat at ol' KF??
post #10 of 15
I didn't mean to suggest that you were disparging MA, I only meant to make the point that whatever flaming she has gotten in the past was undeserved, using my previous example. That wasn't directed at you.

Sorry for the misunderstanding
post #11 of 15
I just want to say what cool people you guys are! I really appreciate your being able to have this conversation as a gentle conversation rather than something nasty. Thanks!

I tend not to write often in the Lounge, just because I don't have much to say....but I have come to think of everyone here as my extended family. It pains me that some of the family is hurt. But it brings joy when I read notes like Kittyfoot's in which he can keep his great sense of humor even though he knows others are irritated with him. And, I really appreciate that the irritated people can be so gentle and thoughtful with their posts. Bravo to you all!
post #12 of 15
Well, I'm one of the ones who doesn't post because she doesn't want the heat. I don't expect people to like me or to agree with me, but sometimes you just know an opinion is going to be unpopular and you don't want to deal with it. I also know, from another board I'm on, that if you post an unpopular or controversial idea and then don't respond to the responses, lots of people think you are running away or afraid to admit you were wrong or just out to agitate. It feels like a no-win situation sometimes.

But I don't feel compelled to respond on all threads, either. Y'all don't need my opinion about every little thing after all. Only if I have something interesting to say or a different viewpoint. And if it looks like a discussion rather than a meeting of the mutual admiration society. If I have nothing to add, why prove it by posting?

I agree that people things way too seriously. These are glowing words on a computer screen, turn them off or don't read it if you can't handle it. Just like changing the channel or deciding not to finish the book. And don't feel like you have to insult the person who wrote the message, either. You can disagree without being nasty. I've just been through that recently with someone on another site too. Some communication cues get lost online, but certain attitudes come through loud and clear.

Or as we used to say, "Take what's useful and good, and leave the rest."
post #13 of 15
Nicely put sunlion!
Thats pretty much how I navigate the forums..I repond to the lighthearted stuff because its safe or may provide someeone with amusement, I respond to what I feel strongly about, but try to be tactful, because it affects me and I want to share my views or experiences, or I just pass them by, whether its because I dont feel what I have to say is thaat important, or maybe because it might be too inflamatory to post without causing conflict. The last is not to say that my views are not importantt, just that they are not important enough to rile up a whole group...they are still my views, and I will stand by them until someone convinces me they are wrong.

if I seem superficial, this is part of the reason...the resst? (I don't think so though)
post #14 of 15
Please excuse the typo's, my lil Rudy has gummed up my keyboard with his "chocolate paws" and my keys tend to sticck if I dont pay close atttention.
Until I buy a new keyboard...get used to it...cuz Rudy is here to stay! :LOL:
post #15 of 15
I didn't know Hissy had left. That's sad but she has her reasons and I respect them. I can only tell I'll miss her... Hissy, if you are reading this message: GOOD LUCK TO YOU and your DH!

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