*Have you ever wanted to laugh SO BAD but couldn't?

Originally Posted by katspixiedust

Nice one! But...they keep the condoms LOCKED UP?! That sounds intimidating!!! lol

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different stores lock up different stuff... it's usually pretty funny...

I've been in stores that locked up the Colgate White Teeth Strips, and in stores that locked up the Jack Daniels while leaving a $50 bottle of single-malt scotch out in the open... doesn't make any sense to me...

ohhh there are so mnay I cannot even bring them to mind. I am the same wya, I laugh at everything and growing up in a church every weekend WAS NOT easy.

Although, we actually DID GET TO SEE a guy try and pull away the other day with the gas nozel still in his car.....ripped the hose clean off the pump...I felt so bad for the guy...but of course I almost peed my pants

Originally Posted by brianlojeck

different stores lock up different stuff... it's usually pretty funny...

I've been in stores that locked up the Colgate White Teeth Strips, and in stores that locked up the Jack Daniels while leaving a $50 bottle of single-malt scotch out in the open... doesn't make any sense to me...

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here in idaho they keep the baby formula locked up, only the powder kind though, i asked why once and they said it was because kids were stealing it to cut there drugs with...she said one store lost $25,000.00 worth of formula, i'd like to know how she knew the drug part? who says it wasn't poor fAmilies stealing for their babies, have you seen the price of formula? i spend $150.00/month on the stuff!

Heres one for you...and I have no shame!!

We have a siberian husky, who is a year old. He goes pretty much everywhere with us...hes our baby. So, I bought a seatbelt harness to be used in the vehicles to keep him pretty stationary, in addition to the fact that I wanted him protected in the event of a wreck or something.
Well, he hates the harness...I mean hates it! He will get in the car and lay down on the seat so that you cant get to the top of the harness where you need to hook the seatbelt through. I usually just make him behave and hook him in anyways, however, my husband doesnt have the patience that I do, and wants Bjourne to sit right and get hooked. Well, the other day, we were having our ususal battle, and Jeremy was already in a bad mood, and I was already laughing at Bjournes facial expressions...and jeremy fights him, and drags him across the seat, and the leather seat gets a small gash in it....I saw the vein in his forehead tick...so I took pity on him, and instructed Bjourne to sit right or go back in the house and get in his kennel. Well, he sits right and jeremy hooks him. Now, jeremy is already mad...and he goes to get out of the car, and bjourne jerks, and the seatbelt flys up (obviously it wasnt hooked completely) and bonks jeremy in the head...I was really trying not to laugh...but he was so comically angry!!! I had to!!!

Can't think of any at the moment, but I know I've had my moments too.
Fwan, help me out, don't Germans call this sort of thing Schadenfreude? Been many moons since I took Deutsche but this word always makes me smile.

Several years ago I was working on a mailing project at work. We had several personalized pieces that had to be collated and put into the right envelope. I had three temporary workers helping me with the project. One of the temps was an older man, and standing next to him was an older woman who had worked with me on projects before. We started working, and a few minutes later the lady got a really odd look on her face and quickly walked over to her purse on the other side of the room. I couldn't figure out why she would just up and leave. Then I smelled it. The older man was having an...um...flatulance problem. This continued all day long. I always knew when it was coming because I'd see her make the face. I wanted to bad to burst out laughing, or say something, or open a window!!!

Originally Posted by Mom of Franz

Easily about a dozen years ago, I was in a patients room helping the traction guy set up the traction for a patients bed. The patient's nurse, a great nurse but a real whirling dervish came in with the patient's meds. She poured the patient's meds and filled her plastic cup with water to take them. About 3 seconds later, she spat out the water, sprayed us all, and announced, "I just drank my own urine!" The nurse's aide had just left the room after getting her routine urine sample. She had forgotten to dispose of the unneeded urine. I ran out of there so fast, found an empty room and laughed my ass off. The traction guy was right behind me.

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Oops!

Last week while I was at the art museum a old man I swear he must've been 80,burped so loud I thought one of the paintings was going to fly off the wall.I about died then I looked at everyone elses face and I had to leave the room ,they were all ready to lose it too!

I used to work at this big warehouse in California..
One day I was in the end stall doing my business when a girl occupies the stall next to mine & starts making these farts..then spraying air freshener.. farting & spraying. farting & spraying. I know she HAD to know she had company, I was bent over, holding my mouth to not laugh..I looked at her shoes & figured out who it was & couldn't look at her for the rest of the day.

Originally Posted by Me-n-my guys

I used to work at this big warehouse in California..
One day I was in the end stall doing my business when a girl occupies the stall next to mine & starts making these farts..then spraying air freshener.. farting & spraying. farting & spraying. I know she HAD to know she had company, I was bent over, holding my mouth to not laugh..I looked at her shoes & figured out who it was & couldn't look at her for the rest of the day.

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I can't help but giggle when I'm in a stall beside a farter. If someone said they didn't laugh when the person in the stall next to them farted, they are LYING. I wonder if she looked at your shoes to figure out who her "neighbor" was LOL!!

Originally Posted by misstorri

Last week while I was at the art museum a old man I swear he must've been 80,burped so loud I thought one of the paintings was going to fly off the wall.I about died then I looked at everyone elses face and I had to leave the room ,they were all ready to lose it too!

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Originally Posted by 5catsandcountin

ohhh there are so mnay I cannot even bring them to mind. I am the same wya, I laugh at everything and growing up in a church every weekend WAS NOT easy.

Although, we actually DID GET TO SEE a guy try and pull away the other day with the gas nozel still in his car.....ripped the hose clean off the pump...I felt so bad for the guy...but of course I almost peed my pants

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I did that.....twice!

Originally Posted by diane8704

Heres one for you...and I have no shame!!

We have a siberian husky, who is a year old. He goes pretty much everywhere with us...hes our baby. So, I bought a seatbelt harness to be used in the vehicles to keep him pretty stationary, in addition to the fact that I wanted him protected in the event of a wreck or something.
Well, he hates the harness...I mean hates it! He will get in the car and lay down on the seat so that you cant get to the top of the harness where you need to hook the seatbelt through. I usually just make him behave and hook him in anyways, however, my husband doesnt have the patience that I do, and wants Bjourne to sit right and get hooked. Well, the other day, we were having our ususal battle, and Jeremy was already in a bad mood, and I was already laughing at Bjournes facial expressions...and jeremy fights him, and drags him across the seat, and the leather seat gets a small gash in it....I saw the vein in his forehead tick...so I took pity on him, and instructed Bjourne to sit right or go back in the house and get in his kennel. Well, he sits right and jeremy hooks him. Now, jeremy is already mad...and he goes to get out of the car, and bjourne jerks, and the seatbelt flys up (obviously it wasnt hooked completely) and bonks jeremy in the head...I was really trying not to laugh...but he was so comically angry!!! I had to!!!

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That was probably not very funny for Jeremy, but I laughed as I read the end.

great reading , thanks for sharing. I most have had plenty of these moments but cant really think of any apart from this one and its a bit sad as well. I work in aged care and one night not long back I was doing rounds and I went in to Mr S's room with my offsider to turn him, when I knocked on the door to announce us he started yelling that he was blind and that he couldn't see. I switched the light on to find out what was wrong and all the while he's yelling that he cant see, I put my hand on to his and said "that because you haven't got your eyes open" he opened his eyes and said "oh!" When we left the room I laughed so much I had to sit down. He's such a lovely old gentleman.

This thread is hilarious!

Oh this is one of the best threads I've come across!

Originally Posted by mistys mum

great reading , thanks for sharing. I most have had plenty of these moments but cant really think of any apart from this one and its a bit sad as well. I work in aged care and one night not long back I was doing rounds and I went in to Mr S's room with my offsider to turn him, when I knocked on the door to announce us he started yelling that he was blind and that he couldn't see. I switched the light on to find out what was wrong and all the while he's yelling that he cant see, I put my hand on to his and said "that because you haven't got your eyes open" he opened his eyes and said "oh!" When we left the room I laughed so much I had to sit down. He's such a lovely old gentleman.

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Wow, that's so cute. I worked for a short time in a nursing home, and know that you MUST have a good sense of humor.

There was one lady who was pretty alert, and she loved frogs. She had frog pictures on her clothes, she slept with a stuffed frog. One day, we found baby frogs jumping in the hallway near the door to the courtyard. I picked one up and put it in a little disposable cup to show her. Well, I handed her the cup, and she put it to her lips! She thought it was a pill! We both got a good laugh out of that one! And the tiny frog was unharmed, and joined his brothers and sisters in the courtyard!

These are the funniest stories!

Oh Beckiboo - that's cute!

Originally Posted by Me-n-my guys

I used to work at this big warehouse in California..
One day I was in the end stall doing my business when a girl occupies the stall next to mine & starts making these farts..then spraying air freshener.. farting & spraying. farting & spraying. I know she HAD to know she had company, I was bent over, holding my mouth to not laugh..I looked at her shoes & figured out who it was & couldn't look at her for the rest of the day.

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I will be the first to admit, I am probably THE most immature person on Earth when it comes to farts. Yes, I am easily amused in general, but farts really get me. My husband and stepson are sleeping, and so I'm here laughing sooooo hard, but trying to be so quiet because this is the funniest story!