Cure for scarediness?

I have had my kitty for 4 months now and he refuses to come out of hiding. I already took him to the vet to rule out any health problems. So this is just a personality thing. I am very thankful for one thing, though. He always does his business in the litterbox. I really wish he would behave more confidently, walk around and come near me.
I read in cat fancy that to make a cat more confident, you need to show him that you are not threatening and to offer him food incentives. So this is what i did. Instead of letting him free feed like i usually do, i place his food bowl next to my desk. That way, if he wants to eat, he should at least approach me within 3 feet. 3 days went by and i noticed the food bowl hasn't been touched at all. I got worried and put his food bowl in the usual location under the bed (where he hides all day and all night). This morning i woke up to find it all empty. He must have been starving but no amount of starvation will make him come near me. It isn't like the distance is too big. My desk is only 5 feet from my bed.
I've also tried making petting sessions more enjoyable. Every morning i crawl under my bed to find him and pet him. He usually lets me. Now whenever he lets me, i give him a small treat which he loves.
I dunno, i'm hoping this stuff will get him to stop hiding all the time. So far no success. How long can a cat starve before health issues start to occur?

Well just so you know, you are not alone. My mom has had her cat for 7 years and she is still terrified of EVERY SINGLE THING. She won't even come down to use the litterbox or eat until she sits and watches to be sure there is nothing scary blocking her way. She is really pathetic. She has had her since she was a kitten. She came from a breeder and the breeder said one of her parents was the same exact way. Who knows, some cats are just scaredy cats. My mom has tried everything, the only thing she did wrong with her was not spay her until she was 5 years old. At first she thought it would be neat to breed her but I talked her out of it. Then she just didn't see the need to. This cat never goes anywhere near the door, barely even comes off of one of the beds upstairs. Even when she was in heat, she stayed upstairs. She will come down once in the morning at a certain time when only my mom is home and beg for a sip of skim milk and that's it.

Anyways, that just might be how your cat is and if you don't know where he came from then who knows what he was exposed to before you got him. How old is he? You say you had him for 4 months, he may just need more time to adjust.

Also Feliway plugins are supposed to work miracles for any kind of problem a cat might have so you can pick one up from petsmart or order it online. It is kind of expensive but should work.

was your cat feral at some point? or born to a feral mother and neglected by the family which owned her?

I've seen too many threads on here about your exact issue - scared cats. I think the best thing to do is give it time but crawling under the bed may be a bad idea - it's like invading the cat's space.

good luck!

Thanks Jen. It is good to know i'm not the only one this is happening to. My kitty is 8 years old and i have no idea what his previous life was like. Okay, whatever. I'll count my blessings and be satisfied.
As for crawling under the bed...i want to pet him and groom him. I see no other choice.

Crawling under the bed is a DEFINITE no-no! Even after 4 weeks, your cat is learning to trust you and the new surroundings. I know you want to pet your new baby, but first you need to learn patience and your cat needs to learn you won't harm her.

I've learned from other postings...ignore her! See to her needs, feed her, give her water, keep the litter clean. But don't look at her and don't pet her! Go in the room, sit on the floor and read aloud. It doesn't matter what you read. You're just getting her used to your voice and presence. When you leave, put some treats in your place.

Think about it from your cat's point of view. Your life has been shaken, you loose your home, put into a small cage, taken out of the cage and put into a small box. Then you go to a strange smelling place so you hide. And daily, your new mommy invades your safe place. We all know you want to just love on her, but she doesn't know that!


ps...OOOPS...wrong sex. It works the same for males.

Originally Posted by Sweets

Crawling under the bed is a DEFINITE no-no! Even after 4 weeks, your cat is learning to trust you and the new surroundings. I know you want to pet your new baby, but first you need to learn patience and your cat needs to learn you won't harm her.

I've learned from other postings...ignore her! See to her needs, feed her, give her water, keep the litter clean. But don't look at her and don't pet her! Go in the room, sit on the floor and read aloud. It doesn't matter what you read. You're just getting her used to your voice and presence. When you leave, put some treats in your place.

Think about it from your cat's point of view. Your life has been shaken, you loose your home, put into a small cage, taken out of the cage and put into a small box. Then you go to a strange smelling place so you hide. And daily, your new mommy invades your safe place. We all know you want to just love on her, but she doesn't know that!


ps...OOOPS...wrong sex. It works the same for males.

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thanks sweets, i knew what i said was right!

I really wish he would behave more confidently, walk around and come near me.

Since he's a scaredy-cat, you will need to meet him more than halfway. Try a couple of these things:

Get out an old sleeping bag and lay down on the floor right by where he hides and take a nap. Be prepared to do this about ten times. Don't be surprised to wake up with your cat walking on you or otherwise checking you out.

Do you have a cat condo or enclosed cat bed or some hidey-hole contraption for your cat? When you aren't napping, put a "cat sanctuary" near the bed and load it down with catnip spray. It might lure him out of hiding and then at least he is out from under the bed.

Get him used to you. Talk to him for about fifteen minutes a day just so he can hear your voice. As someone said, you can read a book aloud or something. If he's under your bed, he should be used to your scent...but otherwise try putting an old (unwashed) t-shirt under his feed bowl so he can start understanding you are his primary caretaker and mean him no harm.

It's not time to panic, but unless this cat has had a really horrible background before you became his owner, four months is a long time and he should have made some more progress by now. If he is really never leaving the bed, and there aren't any realistic threats in the house that are keeping him under the bed, then it is good to be a little proactive here.