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Obituary of Common Sense...

post #1 of 8
Thread Starter 
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend
by the name of Common Sense who has been with
us for many years.

No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth
records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such
value lessons as knowing when to come in out of the
rain, why the early bird gets the worm and that life
isn't always fair.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial
rules (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable
parenting strategies (adults, not kids, are in charge).

His health began to rapidly deteriorate when well
intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in

Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual
harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended
from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a
teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only
worsened his condition.

It declined even further when schools were required to
get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student;
but, could not inform the parents when a student
became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
It gave condom to boys at school as boys will be boys.

Finally, Common sense lost the will to live as the Ten
Commandments became contraband; churches became
businesses; and criminals received better treatment
than their victims.

Common Sense finally gave up the ghost after a woman
failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot,
she spilled a bit in her lap, and was awarded a huge

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents,
Truth and Trust, his wife, Discretion; his daughter,
Responsibility; and his son, Reason.

He is survived by two stepbrothers; My Rights and Ima
Whiner. Not many attended his funeral because so few
realized he was gone.

If you still know him pass this on, if not join the majority
and do nothing.
post #2 of 8
I agree with just about everything here, but I do take issue with the boys (and girls) receiving condoms. Better a condom than a venereal infection...which are skyrocketing in adults and teens and HIV or an unwanted pregnancy.
post #3 of 8
Good points.

Of course I would also point out a country that lives and spends beyond it's means is a big culprit in it's death!

I also don't think the ten commandments are contraband just cause they don't want them at court houses.
post #4 of 8
Well, I agree with it except on the points of ... erm actually I realised I do not agree with most of it, once you sit down and think of it carefully. Quite apart from the issue of abortion and religion, which I don't needs to be touched upon very much since this seems to be a "jokey" paragraph there is one thing that needs to be clarified. That relating to the MacDonald Coffee suit.

The person who sued because of coffee being spilled is actually often being misrepresented. First off, the woman isuffered third degree burns on about 6% of her body which required her to undergo skin grafts. And perhaps more importantly, there was an internal memo or research whereby it was stated that MacDonald's served its coffee at a temperature that is much higher than other restaurants so that it can smell better. Third degree burns at such a temperature would result in permanent scarring and disability for a period of time. A small drop in temperature would reduce the severity of burns. But it was rejected despite the fact that over the past ten years prior to that litigation, there were about 1000 complaints of people who had suffered serious burns as a result. But perhaps here was where MacDonald when kind of off in its defense. It stated that compared to the millions of coffee sold that 1000 number was insignificant. It is somewhat like a defense of people do not really matter. And a a few other facts. The woman was not someone who went round suing others. This was her first suit and she was 81 years of age. And all she initially sought was $20,000, which simply covered the cost of her medical treatments but MacDonalds rejected it. Remember, the judgment was given by a jury of her peers.
post #5 of 8
bumpy, while all your facts about the woman who sued because of spilling coffee are interesting I still have to say... she spilled it. If I made a pot of coffee here at home and I spilled it on me, I wouldn't sue the company who made the coffee maker. If I went to Starbucks and spilled coffee, it would be my fault for being clumsy enough to spill it on me. And while McDonald's is wrong in serving coffee at such a high temperature... she still spilled it. She did, they didn't pour it on her. They didn't make her order the coffee. She knew that coffee would be hot, no matter what temperature.

I do like the rest of the obit... but who were the teens suspended for using mouthwash after class? Also... the line where the teacher was fired for reprimanding a student... that's vague as reprimanding could mean all sorts of things.

Okay done nit-picking now!
post #6 of 8
Reports and studies from MacDonald showed that their customers knew the coffee was hot they did not know it was hot enough to cause third degree burns.
post #7 of 8
Bumpy, I've never read anything about the MacDonald law suit (hear 'rumors' and stuff). Do you have a site where I can read up on that?

-Just ANOTHER reason I don't eat McD's
post #8 of 8
Here is one site I found on the net that talks about it with reference to the Wall Street Journal. It may seem a bit biased given the content of the sit but the facts are true. I have sent you something through private message that comes from a more "objectionable" source.
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