Do you think its bad?

cirque

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I am so saddened to hear of your pain and your Dad's lack of understanding and compassion as well as the abuse he inflicted. Like others, It sounds to me like you need a heart to heart talk with your Dad. Somewhere neutral, not associated with the past negative memories for either of you. I can't put words in your mouth, nor would I want to, whats said has to come from you but I do hope you find the strength to let him know exactly how he has hurt you and how that makes you feel as well as your hopes for the future and what you expect from him. Perhaps he will open his eyes and begin to understand just what his actions do to those around him. With understanding perhaps his heart will soften enough to let your love in and hopefully realize he himself has love in his heart to share with the both of you. Please, talk to him even if you have to let him know you did something your not proud of such as checking his email. I do not expect it to be easy, nor should you, but don't give up hope and take things one day at a time. I wish you all the best and that you are able to get through this situation or at least let go of it enough to get the peace you deserve until your able to deal with it in the future.
 

annabelle33

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Do you think he's giving her the job because she's a college grad?? And the 2,000 for passing, I mean that's like a graduation gift right?? Am I understanding this? I can tell that your father has hurt you and I'm sorry but I don't think you had any business looking into his email.. although I can't say anything because I listened to bf's voicemails this morning hehe.. That temptation is hard to resist! But I guess you just need to move on.
 

me-n-my guys

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I'm sorry to hear about what you are going through with your Dad. it's making me sad, reminding me of the pain I'll carry through life because of my own father. I once went to him, wanting to talk. He said he had nothing to say to me. I told him it was his loss, & walked away. I've been trying to walk away ever since, will never feel any sense of duty to contact him again.
Remind yourself of all of the positive things about you. Keep them close to your heart, & be yourself.
 

catsknowme

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Fwan, I suggest that you look into Narcsistic Personality Disorder. There are several good websites. You can look over the criteria checklist, and you may find that your dad has lots of those traits. Then you may get some insight into his favoritism & other hurtful behavior. He may need to be admired by others, and because you know the "real" him, he treats you like second class. On the other hand, your cousin gets cash gifts & a good paying job - & she probably sees just the "caring, giving uncle". Anyway, that's a bit of unsolicited advice - it was given to me recently, I followed it and discovered alot for me about how my dad is & why my hubby can treat me so shabbily sometimes, while the rest of the world gloats at how wonderfully lucky I am to have those 2 men in my life!!
 

malakai711

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Dont feel too bad Fran.. I check my fathers email all the time... As for why he would give your cousin the job and not you.. I dont know what to say... but, something better will come along for you... You have to have faith that everything happens for a reason!
 

pinkdaisy226

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Oh Fwan, I'm sorry you're having to deal with this.
I know the temptation is there, and I have to fight it so often... the few times I've peeked at another person's mail (without cheating, their mail was open for everyone to read) it hurt me.

I don't have any advice to give you because everything that has been given is good. I just want you to know that I'm here for you and I'm sorry you're going through this - but I'm so proud of you for everything you've accomplished!
 
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fwan

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I dont know, she can have the job, i dont care.. I WILL be more successful than her.
She will suffer having to always move, it might pay good, but she can forget having a normal family.

And for me having a family is a priority in life.
 

yoviher

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Originally Posted by fwan

I dont know, she can have the job, i dont care.. I WILL be more successful than her.
She will suffer having to always move, it might pay good, but she can forget having a normal family.

And for me having a family is a priority in life.
Ladies, gentlement, cats, everyone... step up to a round of a applause.
Fran, you have just shown the one thing that without it, you won't get anywhere. Determination and will power.
 
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fwan

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i know i want to have a baby when im 20! but bf isnt still too keen!
 
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