I read some articles on socialising kittens, and I picked him up a couple of times a day without him coming to me which is what I usually do with the cats - I didn't make him stay, but I picked him up and fed him treats while I was holding him, made a fuss of him and let him get down as soon as he asked so he was sure that being on me was a nice experience. He loves being picked up and hugged now, and held upsidown in my arms like a baby, but he only started liking that when he got to his full size, I have no idea why! He's not a lap cat- I think he might be someone who needs to feel very sure of what's under his paws- but he'll get as close as he can and yell at me to be petted, he's very loving. It's great, as when he was tiny I really was quite upset that he just didn't seem to want human company at all! Two things I found helpful- one was to read on the net things by breeders about how they socialised their kittens, especially in handling them and getting them used to handling, and the other was something I read by one breeder who said that some kittens can't cope without knowing where the 'floor' is to stand on- if you pick the kitten up facing away from you and on your lap or arm rather than head up on your chest, they might feel more secure. This worked on Mitz and it worked too for the first couple of weeks with Jazzie. She's another 'feet on firm ground' girl. Really hope you and your kitty find the connection, I know how sad it made me at the time, but Mitz in the last two months has grown right into his personality- it just took a long time to get to know him, he's just a subtle boy.