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Nervous!

post #1 of 23
Thread Starter 
I have a 'date' tonight, and I am soooo nervous right now. I've never actually been on a date with someone I don't know very well before - all of my previous relationships were with guys with whom I was friends with before the relationship, so we just sort of transitioned from one to the other - this is so much scarier! I'm pretty shy with people I don't know well, so I'm afraid I'll be all awkward and there'll be awkward silences and it'll be awful. Also, I have this rejection phobia, so of course I'm afraid that I'll like him but he won't like me and then I'll feel bad (especially since this is the first I've dated since getting out of a long, serious relationship last fall, which I'm just now starting to get over, so I'm always afraid things like that will set me back as far as that goes). Anyone have any advice? Is there any dating 'etiquette' I should know about? Please send me some 'don't be all shy and awkward about things' vibes!

Thanks for letting me get this out, I feel a bit better just typing it all all out!
post #2 of 23
I haven't been on many dates, and im not so good at advice.

but just be yourself and you should be fine
post #3 of 23
Just think about the fact that he will probably be just as nervous as you are and be yourself.

Be attentive when he is talking and ask him questions about his family, his life, etc. People respond well to people who are genuinely caring and interested.
post #4 of 23
I was going to say the same thing about him being nervous as well.

Just be yourself then you can't go wrong.
post #5 of 23
A date tonight, Kylie, how wonderful! As previously stated, be exactly yourself, how could he help but think you're wonderful! Have a wonderful time, we look forward to all the details!
post #6 of 23
yeahhh that
GOod luck
and all the best
just be your self!
post #7 of 23
I have been on i think one maybe two dates where I didn't already know the person to some extent. The one I remember clearly was AWFUL. Just horrible. We went for drinks and it was sooo bad that I got wasted and didn't even kiss him goodnight which i tend to do when I'm plastered. It was bad, like beyond bad, and I'm glad he didn't kill me because I had only met him once before and I didn't meet him through anyone.

But I'm sure you'll have a great time and if not you'll at least have a funny story to tell for the rest of your life!

As far as tips, i think it's best to talk in general about non important things for the most part, like what you do, where you went to school and grew up, etc, what you do for fun, favorite movies and stuff, but not to go too deep into anything or bring up anything negative at all. If you see the conversation going that way try to think of something positive to slightly alter the course. The drama can come later.

I like to go to slightly louder restaurants on the first date, that have louder music but enough that you can talk, so the silence is not as uncomfortable and you don't have to worry about weird eating noises that inevitably occur when you are trying like hell not to (like slurping soup or something).

And a lot of people dispute this but I think capping off the nights with drinks at a bar is casual enough but still intimate enough to get to know someone.

And when in doubt, look bored--guys love that.
post #8 of 23
Ask him about himself and listen carefully to the answers so you can ask more questions, and he will love it. Good luck!
post #9 of 23
Thread Starter 
Wow, you guys have some great advice! Thank you so much, I'll be sure to let you all know how it goes!
post #10 of 23
Quote:
Originally Posted by rosiemac
Just be yourself then you can't go wrong.
I´m so sure you´re a interesting Person!!! Good Luck Kylie and have a good time
post #11 of 23
Also, wear something that makes YOU feel great! You will feel a lot more confident if you are comfortable!

As everyone else said, be yourself and ask questions (men love the attention! )

Good luck and lots of 'Great Date' }}}VIBES{{{ coming your way!
post #12 of 23
And one more piece of advice..........don't wear BLACK and advise him not to either if he is picking you up at your house.

I used to date a cop who would often stop by while he was working or after work with his black uniform on. Of course Shelby just loved him, so he always went home covered in white cat hair.
post #13 of 23
Jennyranson is right. People LOVE to be asked about themselves, so be a good listener, unless, of course, he turns out not to be your type, then just start talking about yourself all night and maybe he'll drop you off early!
post #14 of 23
I just wanted to wish you good luck. Also, my first date with my husband was a total disaster, so sometimes first impressions don't necessarily stick!! Try to have fun and just be who you are.
post #15 of 23
Kylie, you have such great advice here. Why don't we all just tag along?

post #16 of 23
Aww, Kylie, I know how you feel... I've never been on an actual date either... I've always done the transition from friend to boyfriend thing... I'll mimic everyone else and say... Be yourself! If there is an awkward silence throw a green bean at him or something... LoL no, I'm just kidding.... that's more like a third date thing LoL See, now if there's an awkward silence you're gonna giggle and he'll ask why and then you can tell him what I said and you'll both laugh and you can thank me later! Let us know how it goes!! Good Luck Vibes!!!
post #17 of 23
All the best Kylie. I'm sure it will be great!
post #18 of 23
Sending "great date" vibes your way. You've gotten some astute advice about asking him questions; you can't go wrong if you follow it.
post #19 of 23
It couldn't possibly be worse than my first dinner date with my husband. I accidentally elbowed the waiter in his sensitive area. I apologized and the waiter said "no hard feelings" - I replied - "you're right, there weren't". After the waiter left the table, my husband asked me why I said that. I was completely honest and told him I had no idea - my mouth opened and it just came out.
post #20 of 23
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yosemite
It couldn't possibly be worse than my first dinner date with my husband. I accidentally elbowed the waiter in his sensitive area. I apologized and the waiter said "no hard feelings" - I replied - "you're right, there weren't". After the waiter left the table, my husband asked me why I said that. I was completely honest and told him I had no idea - my mouth opened and it just came out.

oh my goodness!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Whatever happened next? Well, nevermind that. I see it's been a long marriage......
post #21 of 23
Thread Starter 
Thank you all SO much for the advice, you guys are the best!

It went really well! We seem to have a lot in common, which made for really fun conversation, not awkward at all, I had a really good time! - I didn't get home until this morning at 9:00 after breakfast, so, um, that should give you an idea of how well it went. We're going out again tomorrow night, so guess the advice and vibes worked, THANK YOU again!
post #22 of 23
You got home this morning????? Young lady, you need a chaperone!

I'm glad you're feeling good about it.
post #23 of 23
You dirty stop out!!!!!

Sounds like it went great!
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