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My dream last night. Way long post.

post #1 of 15
Thread Starter 
Okay... I felt there was more to this dream then I could find. Please let me know your thoughts.

In my dream... I walked into a bedroom, and there was my mom, sleeping in bed. I stood there for a few minutes smiling at her. I remember the feeling so well. I was happy and comforted by seeing her sleep. I remember feeling in my heart that I hadn't seen her in a while, but on the same hand, seeing her was not strange to me.

She looked similar to my mom before she gained weight from the steroids they put her on. This was before her hair thinned from the chemo. This was before she aged 10 years in 2 from poor health and sleep. She looked more like she did when I was a young teenager. Healthy, beautiful, young... healthy. Beautiful... Her skin was dark, not pale. She was so beautiful.

I walked out of the room, and into another, then stopped. In my mind I realized that she had passed away, and there she was sleeping. I went back into the room, and she was still in bed sleeping. The wierd thing was, she and my stepdad(I call him dad). were sleeping in seperate beds, like on old sitcoms. What is really wierd is that she didn't sleep in the same room with him. She had horrible lungs, and felt closed in in small rooms, so she slept in the livingroom where there was more airflow. But they were sleeping side by side in seperate beds, seperated by an end table.

She woke up. She crawled out of bed. We walked into the livingroom and were talking, I honestly don't remember what we were talking about at that point.

We walked to the end of the livingroom, and there was like a bar, or counter or something. We stood kinda leaning on that bar, and she picked up a jacket, and got a pack of cigarettes and started to light one. I was like... NO!! You DON'T smoke, you quit.

...

...

"I'm in pain though, Tia. I'm hurting, bad, can't you see it on my face? Can't you see it in my eyes?"

I fell apart in my dream. Suddenly it hit me... She's got cancer. I started hurting so bad then. My heart was imploding. My heart hurt. Suddenly I felt the pain.

"Tia, I see the pain on your face, the pain in your eyes. You are hurting too." And she just went on talking. I don't remember the rest, I did this morning, but I worked 11 hours today, and I forgot.

I kept thinking of the dream. I didn't wake up feeling that empty hurt feeling that I get sometimes when I see her in my dreams, like being reminded I can't talk to her again. While I was dreaming, I felt her energy just like I always did when she was alive. I haven't felt that in my waking hours in about 3 and a half years. But when I am dreaming. I do remember something about a voice, or a thought that let me know that I always felt her. Day in, Day out. And I belived it in my dream. This morning I woke up feeling good. Happy. I miss her, I miss her so much. I didn't feel that empty feeling. I felt like I had JUST hung out with her.

I just wanted to post it cuz there are a few of you (you know who you are) who might understand some of it better then me. I am so emotionaly wrapped up in the whole experience, and dream, and everything that I cannot see past my emotions.

I pretty much just got that she's always with me... I thought maybe the seperate beds was my mind seperating them. I guess maybe my mind is moving on with him in his life, but now perhaps I will not dream of them together? I don't think I ever did. Maybe SHE was telling me they were seperate. Maybe he let go? Maybe she did? I don't know. I just feel that there is significance(SP?) to this dream, and through the tears and emotions I can't see it. Thankyou

We ate Christmas dinner with my dad and his girlfriend on the 26th. To me it's all family, I've never felt any negative feeling about them being together. It's been nothing but good for all of us. Especially for him, and for her. I love them both A LOT.
post #2 of 15
Your mom just misses you and came for a visit. My grandfather used t visit me often. I would tell him he had passed away and he always said " I know" and we would go fishing or just hang out.
post #3 of 15
Maybe being in the different beds was to reitterate that she is ok with your dad moving on and happy for him. I believe that a dream involving people who have past is a message from them.

I think that she was trying to comfort you during this holiday season.
post #4 of 15
Thank you for sharing with us.
post #5 of 15
Quote:
Originally Posted by DragonLady
Your mom just misses you and came for a visit. My grandfather used t visit me often. I would tell him he had passed away and he always said " I know" and we would go fishing or just hang out.



Yes. Tia, yes.

-E.
post #6 of 15
I think they may be a bit more to it.........im no dream interpreter...i tried it but that stuff is impossible.....lol....but maybe there is still some unfinished bussines in regards to her passing....and maybe because she smoked in the dream and it was before she got her cancer....maybe it was you subconcious trying to go back in time and stop her from smoking and in turn getting her to avoid cancer....If thats the case...which i really dont know if it is you must know...(as a smoker and soon god willing an ex smoker)....these pardon my term "cancer sticks" really beat you down..they basically take over your lives......and well they just suck...but you know that.....
In anycase there is probably something that you havent delt with yet...something real small..i don't know...but i am sure when you find it out and come to grips with it you will probably start having more plesent dreams that include your mom........
The reason why i think this and dont think it was actually your mom is not because i dont belive in ghosts...(actually you could call me a ghost advocate...my hobby is ghost hunting)...but rather because she apperently hurt you in the dream, and i am 100% positive that your mother knows how much her death affected you and would not make contact with you only to abset you... the way you speck of her i can tell that she adored you greatly.............
this is purly opinion though as i said i cant interpret dreams...its just a feeling i have...in any case as always tia i wish you the best
post #7 of 15
Thread Starter 
Okay, it wasn't as long as I thought it seemed.

I've always talked to her in my dreams. I remember telling her about our cockatiels when we had them. I remember telling her about how beautiful MyRage was, as though she'd only been away. I appreciate all the input, and I think you are all right.
Quote:
Originally Posted by DragonLady
Your mom just misses you and came for a visit.
Quote:
Originally Posted by sashacat421
Yes. Tia, yes.
I feel that way a lot of times when I wake up after a dream about her. As though she'd just visited. Sometimes the dreams are funny, sometimes sad, but never THIS powerful. I've never felt such real, strong, pure emotion in a dream. I really thought with the way I felt that there was no way this could be a dream, and that I was about to relive a horrible nightmare I must have had.

But this time I felt just like I had hung with her, or that we 'bonded' as we called it lol. I felt like I had a recharge of my mom's energy... LOL I never thought about her missing me though, I always figured she'd come see me cuz I miss her. She shouldn't miss me, I am still here. She can be near me when ever. She can see me at my happiest and my saddest. That was one thing I thought about a lot in the last of her life.

Quote:
Originally Posted by catherine
Maybe being in the different beds was to reitterate that she is ok with your dad moving on and happy for him. I believe that a dream involving people who have past is a message from them.

I think that she was trying to comfort you during this holiday season.
I think the beds has something to do with either ME seperating them, or HER seperating them. Maybe I'm off, but I am glad that you said what you did. I like that idea. That does sound like her. This has been the best holiday season we've had as a family or idividuals since she passed.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nebula11
I think they may be a bit more to it.........im no dream interpreter...i tried it but that stuff is impossible.....lol....but maybe there is still some unfinished bussines in regards to her passing....and maybe because she smoked in the dream and it was before she got her cancer....maybe it was you subconcious trying to go back in time and stop her from smoking and in turn getting her to avoid cancer....If thats the case...which i really dont know if it is you must know...(as a smoker and soon god willing an ex smoker)....these pardon my term "cancer sticks" really beat you down..they basically take over your lives......and well they just suck...but you know that.....
In anycase there is probably something that you havent delt with yet...something real small..i don't know...but i am sure when you find it out and come to grips with it you will probably start having more plesent dreams that include your mom........
The reason why i think this and dont think it was actually your mom is not because i dont belive in ghosts...(actually you could call me a ghost advocate...my hobby is ghost hunting)...but rather because she apperently hurt you in the dream, and i am 100% positive that your mother knows how much her death affected you and would not make contact with you only to abset you... the way you speck of her i can tell that she adored you greatly.............
this is purly opinion though as i said i cant interpret dreams...its just a feeling i have...in any case as always tia i wish you the best .
I've thought about the 'unfinished business' idea... I wouldn't know though... I wish I did, maybe I could help... ??

I tried my whole life from about 4 on telling her not to smoke, it was bad for her, Smoky Bear said so Of course that was my interpretation of a picture of a cigarette butt and forest fire... I did honestly try so hard to talk her into quitting, and she did, 9 months before she passed away!! That was 4 months before she found out she had cancer, in her liver.

I know I am not past her passing, obviously. She was my most important person in my whole life, the only one who was always there, my protector, my mom, my dad, my friend, my best bud... I just don't know how to be past it... how do you do that? Forget? Most of the time I am perfectly fine. If I could get past what ever I am not past...

My dreams are usually really happy. One time we were christmas shopping, now that I think about it, she wondered off to find some ornaments, and my little brother and I hunted and hunted, and never found her...

What happened to her was confusing to me and my mind. They accidentaly overdosed her. She almost died, but ended up in a drug induced coma for a couple days. Until this opium based pain patch fell off her while she was sleeping, and she started waking up. THAT was scary. We were all prepaired for her to pass away, and she came back instead. My little brother and I stayed with her for the first three days she was coming too. Then my aunt took over, that was when she was halucinating horribly. It was really scary. When she first passed away I was really confused. In my dreams, she would be alive, and I would wake up... *SMACK* reality. That's the short version.

I was thinking about it, after I read your post, and the part about you didn't think she did visit. It made TOTAL sense... but not the way you meant it.

My mom didn't understand my emotions. How I always felt for others. How could I cry when I didn't know the people hurt, or why would I cry when I was around other people who were crying. Why did I always get so sad when others were sad. How I let things bother me that shouldn't. How I 'wore my heart on my sleve'... I don't think she would intentionaly hurt me, but she's said a few things to me in other dreams that I am still confused, or scared over.

That actualy did sound like her, not that she MEANT to hurt me. But she was just honest, She was always a straight forward woman who always said what crossed her mind... even if it was the silliest thing. Sometimes she was brutaly honest if need be . Sometimes she could seem cruel with her honesty, but honesty is good. Not a lot of people can be honest.

Perhaps she wanted me to actually admit she had passed in the dream to her... Maybe she's trying to make me face it. IN my dream. I've never been able to really TALK to her, I should say WITH her. I usually do all the talking. I want to conversate with her in my dreams. I could never fully believe what she would ever tell me though. I have enough scepticisiam(SP?) in me that I would question if it were my mind that made it up? I also have enough believer in me to question the possibility of it being her.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DragonLady
My grandfather used t visit me often. I would tell him he had passed away and he always said " I know" and we would go fishing or just hang out.
IF I can remember, and think to do it, and actually do it, next time I dream about her, I will try that. Maybe we could go yard saling
post #8 of 15
I have nothing to offer you, I just want you to know that I am sitting here imagining what you must be going through, and it really makes me want to know my Mom better, we are very close now, but I don't want to have this happen to me~
I dont want that to sound uncaring, its just that I see the love you have for your Mom and I want to be sure that mine knows I feel the same....


Whatever comes of this dream, whatever you decide it means, take it as another moment you spent with her, another moment you could love her "in person", another moment~
post #9 of 15
Geeze Tia you may be right...maybe she needs to hear you say it.....and let me apologize for assuming that it was lung cancer...that was a bit ignorant of me...
Also that all must have been too much for you...your mom your brother and you...by the sounds of her passing it seems that there would be a lot of left over ressinence or energy or something if ya know what I mean....maybe that all needs to work out on its own....obviously youll never get over her death...youll never stop missing her, or dreaming of her, but perhaps in time youll understand it....and maybe thats what these dreams are....you are obviously more empathetic then most, and probably are more adversly affected by her left over ressonence....but then this turns all of this into a metaphysical debate, and frankly its 3:30 am, and i dont think i could do that.....lol ........ In anycase you have more healing to do..(obviously)...and of course I and everyone else is here if you ever need us....One day I am sure life will make more sense...and once life makes sence we will start working on our dreams....lol..
post #10 of 15
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ash_bct
I have nothing to offer you, I just want you to know that I am sitting here imagining what you must be going through, and it really makes me want to know my Mom better, we are very close now, but I don't want to have this happen to me~
I dont want that to sound uncaring, its just that I see the love you have for your Mom and I want to be sure that mine knows I feel the same....


Whatever comes of this dream, whatever you decide it means, take it as another moment you spent with her, another moment you could love her "in person", another moment~
Thankyou. That is a good idea... another moment for me to remember.

You know... It's normal, too normal for people NOT to be aware that our loved ones are mortal. We DON'T want to think about it. We are conditioned to not dwell on death... or what ever... There is a place called reality in there somewhere. It's not uncaring, and myself, before she passed... It was Monday September 10th, 2001 when I was going to sleep that I got THAT feeling. Her time was near. Suddenly it hit me that I was out of time. I prayed so hard for the feeling to be false What I wouldn't have given for another week. A few days. I would spend ALL DAY with her. I would be the PERFECT daughter. The next day... everyone's lives changed forever. I didn't know I had 17 hours left with her, so... What makes ME feel better is to think that my experience and heartache can give a mother and a daughter(or a son) a better closer relationship that they can enjoy. I used to ask people to call their mom's and let them know how important they are, and that they love them. And kiss them if they can. It's my way of letting my mom know how I feel. You made me feel good, I didn't even ask Thankyou so much.
post #11 of 15
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nebula11
Geeze Tia you may be right...maybe she needs to hear you say it.....and let me apologize for assuming that it was lung cancer...that was a bit ignorant of me...
Also that all must have been too much for you...your mom your brother and you...by the sounds of her passing it seems that there would be a lot of left over ressinence or energy or something if ya know what I mean....maybe that all needs to work out on its own....obviously youll never get over her death...youll never stop missing her, or dreaming of her, but perhaps in time youll understand it....and maybe thats what these dreams are....you are obviously more empathetic then most, and probably are more adversly affected by her left over ressonence....but then this turns all of this into a metaphysical debate, and frankly its 3:30 am, and i dont think i could do that.....lol ........ In anycase you have more healing to do..(obviously)...and of course I and everyone else is here if you ever need us....One day I am sure life will make more sense...and once life makes sence we will start working on our dreams....lol..
With cigarettes in the picture my whole life, we thought her lungs would get her. We were fooled. Thankyou for your words.

I'm too empathetic... always have been.

My mom never ever believed that people who passed could contact people who were living, she didn't believe it was possible at all. She believed that reincarnation and talking with spirits couldn't co-exist. One night I told her my theory. Then I told her some things that made her skin crawl, a little. I knew things that I shouldn't have. Not bad things, just little things. She believed after that, and never doubted after that. I come from a spiritual people, and I love my ancestors for all their spirituality.

Thankyou again.
post #12 of 15
Tia, I also think your Mom came to visit you. I'm not really sensitive to these things, although I do have empathy with people who are alive. But my husband and daughter are very sensitive to these things - it seems to come through my husband's family line. Hubby is visited by both his father and brother and my daughter is visited in dreams by hubby's father (grandpa). Hubby's brother died relatively young, at 53 from smoking-induced cancer. There were no issues with his dad's death, he was 90 and just came to the end. But both guide him, give him advice in his dreams or just let him know they are with him. Both hubby and daughter feel grandpa's presence almost all the time.

I think also there is some significance in the separate beds - maybe your mom was letting you know that you needn't worry about how she would feel that dead is moving on with his life - that mom is ok with it. It's certainly something parents would expect their children to worry about and maybe she was putting your mind at rest.

The important thing from this is that now you can't have your mom with you all the time, you can still feel comforted by her in some other way.
post #13 of 15
ahhhh tia my medium friend.......
post #14 of 15
i think she came down to heal you.

My sister came down to warn me about my mother.
I forgot what i was about to warn her about but my mother always said i was rubbish.


its weird though because....sometimes when i think back to things i never see it from my body. I always see it from a corner but i am never allowed to see my body. I see everything even the things that were happening although it was behind me and i then wake up with my body shaking as if i was falling. but i wasnt sleeping?

Last year after my grandmother died, i( didnt really know her because she lived so far away from me but she was really angry at me)
she came to me in my sleep well i dreamt of her, she was wearing her favourite clothes and a nice hairstyle. She looked younger before she died of lung cancer and she wasnt a smoker.

She was on the other side of the fence but the backround was all pink, dark peachy pink, she looked really angry at me and kept on walking along the fense. It wasnt my faut that i missed the flight to go to her funeral "ryanair" can suck! bt i felt so bad. maybe this is why she was angry at me because i missed out on her funeral.
post #15 of 15
Hey Tia..... Here is a site that could help you put your dreams in perspective.
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