Oh Michele! What a breakthrough!!! Of course Pengy knew it wasn't the feather.
And it was a huge leap of trust for her to accept it. I bet her fur just felt like the finest silk to you.
-
Too many ads? Join our community of cat lovers now to reduce ads by 90%! Click here to join for free!
Poor Pengy thread is gone
- Thread starter captiva
- Start Date
Michele this is so wonderful! Of course she knew it was you--from what you've told us about Pengy, I think she always knows exactly what is going on. What an amazing breakthrough. Go Pengy!
I logged on at work as I'd finished early and found your news
You must be thrilled. What a sweet girl she is - all your patience and kindness has paid off.
I bet you'll never forget how her fur first felt to you.
GO PENGY!!!!
Nope, I will never forget it.Originally Posted by flisssweetpea
Michele, what can I say - I'm ecstatic for you.
I logged on at work as I'd finished early and found your news. Of course she knew it was you - I believe she did.
You must be thrilled. What a sweet girl she is - all your patience and kindness has paid off.
I bet you'll never forget how her fur first felt to you.
GO PENGY!!!!
And just to note, she's taken another step today. She curled up on the rocker seat, next to the condo, where I usually sit when I'm interacting with her.
I saw her there this morning...and thought, well, it's an aberation. It won't last. It's too open, too exposed to me and the other kitties.
But nope, she was there when I came home sick. I laid down to take a nap, and she was there when I went to sleep...and there when I woke up 2 hours later. And she was there when I left the room, and as I've been tooling 'round the house.
So maybe she's moved her parameters again, and increasing her space. This is good!
We'll do our play session tonight, and see what happens with that. Wouldn't it be great if she'd let me touch her again? I won't push it, though. She still needs her space, and she may still be reconsidering allowing me to pet her.
Thanks for all the support, and all the love. I know she feels it, and I know I feel it. You're all making a difference.
Best-
Michele
Oh, this brings tears to my eyes! I'm so happy for you and for Pengy. Thank you for showing such amazing patience in building a bridge of trust between you and her!
- Joined
- Feb 19, 2001
- Messages
- 34,872
- Purraise
- 77
Care to try a bold experiment? I believe she (and you) are ready. This is what I do with scared ferals who don't trust humans much-
Lay one of your hands palm flat against the floor, or other object near Pengy. With your other hand, put treats on that hand in the middle of your hand- again, you palm is down not up. Less threatening to them that way, and they do know the difference. Stay there steady and still like a rock, close your eyes and breathe slow and easy. Let her take the bait. Once she takes the bait try not to clap
withdraw your hand slow and easy away from her, leave her a few treats and then leave the room. Do this about three times a day and see if it helps her relax-
You both are doing great Michele. You have really shown Pengy that you can be trusted- that in and of itself is a HUGE step- the fact that she now seeks out your scent to sleep on is a big vote of trust in her mind
Lay one of your hands palm flat against the floor, or other object near Pengy. With your other hand, put treats on that hand in the middle of your hand- again, you palm is down not up. Less threatening to them that way, and they do know the difference. Stay there steady and still like a rock, close your eyes and breathe slow and easy. Let her take the bait. Once she takes the bait try not to clap
You both are doing great Michele. You have really shown Pengy that you can be trusted- that in and of itself is a HUGE step- the fact that she now seeks out your scent to sleep on is a big vote of trust in her mind
Hey Michele
You came home sick? I hope you're feeling ok - make sure you look after yourself as well as your furbabies.
It's lovely that she's sitting in your chair - it smells of you, isn't that lovely.
Adelaide was a little unsure when we approached her for the first few times, but only for the initial touch - she soon stuck her botty in the air (very elegant Addie
) to be stroked all the way along her back. Now she doesn't flinch at all. I'd keep on keeping on - just taking it gently like you are doing and not pushing her beyond what she's comfortable with.
I hope you get to touch her silky fur again.
You came home sick? I hope you're feeling ok - make sure you look after yourself as well as your furbabies.
It's lovely that she's sitting in your chair - it smells of you, isn't that lovely.
Adelaide was a little unsure when we approached her for the first few times, but only for the initial touch - she soon stuck her botty in the air (very elegant Addie
I hope you get to touch her silky fur again.
awww YAY PENGYYYYYYY
this is exciting.. who said there wasn't a probability to touch her round christmas? *grins* I think it was you, lol!
this is exciting.. who said there wasn't a probability to touch her round christmas? *grins* I think it was you, lol!
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #49
I repeat what I said earlier - you are going to get an early Christmas present. I couldn't be happier for you.
The last two updates are great!
Congrats!!!!
Congrats!!!!
Oh my heavens, I'm in tears here. Both happy and sad ones.
Tonight, during our regular play session, she really didn't want to play too much. Fine, no issues. I sat on the floor in front of the condo, and let her settle down some. I put out some treats, and she smacked me (again, no claws...
) and then ate the treats. She then turned her back on me, and gave me her bottom.
Well, and so why not. I reached out - without the feather wand!!! - and tentatively touched her left hip. She didn't move, didn't change her breathing, nothing. So I added several fingers, one at a time, until all 4 fingers and my thumb were touching her hip. Rhythmic, gentle oh-so-delicate touching, small strokes, ready to move my hand should the need arise.
And NO need arose. I progressed to her spine, stroking her from about 4 inches above her tail to her tail, slowly, gently, and firmer, now. Not as deliberate as I do with my other guys, but she knew it was me, there was no doubt she knew. And as I stroked her back, I would scritch her intensely gently at the base of her spine. She allowed that. Her breathing slowed, and you could feel her relaxing her back and hips. She was enjoying this, accepting this.
And this went on for about 4 minutes. 4 MINUTES!!!!!
Of course, tears were dripping down my face. No way I could do that without crying. But while I was stroking her, loving her gently, trying to send all my love through my fingers, I felt a hard bump. It wasn't a cyst - I know what those feel like. I let my fingers wander a bit over that spot, trying to not touch it too much...and then I realized. It is the spot where her spine was broken. It's healed and calcified, per my vet, and that was what I was feeling - her old break, now healed and healed poorly. And it made me cry all the more.
I've known she broke her spine at the base of her back since I had her vetted. I didn't realize I would be able to feel it. And that evidence broke my heart. For while I wasn't touching her, while I wasn't feeling it, I could sort of ignore that she has gone through hell to make it here. Sorta because of her behavior, but still...I could ignore her injuries. But I can't help but cry for all th pain she must've felt, all the hurt she endured, by herself and without Dr.s care. And it hurts me in my soul to know this about her, my sweet terrified trying-to-trust-again kitty.
And so it's both good and bad that she's letting me love on her physically. Good because of what that means - she's beginning to trust me, to know I'm not the boogie man. Bad because that means I really understand now what's happened to her, and that makes my heart heavy; makes my soul cry.
But she's letting me touch her - and for a long time, too. I stopped before she could get antsy...but it's a real vision in my head that someday she will be in my lap, and I'll make a post with her purring there, snug and secure. How great will that day be? Hugely great. And while I can't wait for it to happen, I am willing to wait as long as it takes. Because that day, I'll be in heaven, and she will know she's loved and protected.
I am sooooooooo very proud of her.
Best-
Michele
Tonight, during our regular play session, she really didn't want to play too much. Fine, no issues. I sat on the floor in front of the condo, and let her settle down some. I put out some treats, and she smacked me (again, no claws...
Well, and so why not. I reached out - without the feather wand!!! - and tentatively touched her left hip. She didn't move, didn't change her breathing, nothing. So I added several fingers, one at a time, until all 4 fingers and my thumb were touching her hip. Rhythmic, gentle oh-so-delicate touching, small strokes, ready to move my hand should the need arise.
And NO need arose. I progressed to her spine, stroking her from about 4 inches above her tail to her tail, slowly, gently, and firmer, now. Not as deliberate as I do with my other guys, but she knew it was me, there was no doubt she knew. And as I stroked her back, I would scritch her intensely gently at the base of her spine. She allowed that. Her breathing slowed, and you could feel her relaxing her back and hips. She was enjoying this, accepting this.
And this went on for about 4 minutes. 4 MINUTES!!!!!
Of course, tears were dripping down my face. No way I could do that without crying. But while I was stroking her, loving her gently, trying to send all my love through my fingers, I felt a hard bump. It wasn't a cyst - I know what those feel like. I let my fingers wander a bit over that spot, trying to not touch it too much...and then I realized. It is the spot where her spine was broken. It's healed and calcified, per my vet, and that was what I was feeling - her old break, now healed and healed poorly. And it made me cry all the more.
I've known she broke her spine at the base of her back since I had her vetted. I didn't realize I would be able to feel it. And that evidence broke my heart. For while I wasn't touching her, while I wasn't feeling it, I could sort of ignore that she has gone through hell to make it here. Sorta because of her behavior, but still...I could ignore her injuries. But I can't help but cry for all th pain she must've felt, all the hurt she endured, by herself and without Dr.s care. And it hurts me in my soul to know this about her, my sweet terrified trying-to-trust-again kitty.
And so it's both good and bad that she's letting me love on her physically. Good because of what that means - she's beginning to trust me, to know I'm not the boogie man. Bad because that means I really understand now what's happened to her, and that makes my heart heavy; makes my soul cry.
But she's letting me touch her - and for a long time, too. I stopped before she could get antsy...but it's a real vision in my head that someday she will be in my lap, and I'll make a post with her purring there, snug and secure. How great will that day be? Hugely great. And while I can't wait for it to happen, I am willing to wait as long as it takes. Because that day, I'll be in heaven, and she will know she's loved and protected.
I am sooooooooo very proud of her.
Best-
Michele
Oh, Michele... I've missed several days of this thread, and just caught up -- and I'm teary, too. How lovely and how sad. But what wonderful progress!! Congratulations to both of you!
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #55
Michele,
This is so wonderful. I understand why you were upset thinking about her injury. It's past now. She's probably just thinking about how much she loves you and her condo. How she's able to sleep now in a safe place and out of the rain.
Take care and keep us updated. I love to read about her progress.
This is so wonderful. I understand why you were upset thinking about her injury. It's past now. She's probably just thinking about how much she loves you and her condo. How she's able to sleep now in a safe place and out of the rain.
I know that you are very logical Pengy. Please don't expect too much but I think you will be pleased. You know that Mama story was in no way comparable to Pengy's. I still cannot hold her and she does not come up sit on the couch with us, etc. She is happy though and eventhough she doesn't get of the couch and I can't hold her, she does love to be petted and purrs loudly. Oh and yes..... she usually sleeps at Daddy's feet. I'm sure you'd be more than pleased if Pengy did that, wouldn't you
Oh wow! What a great post - I was torn reading it, like you were torn writing it. However, I think you shouldn't dwell on all the bad she went through - it's in her past, just like those days when she used to hide under the bed. She did go through a lot but now she has a lot of loving and other good things to look forward to, thanks to you. I'm so glad she's letting you touch her and love on her - I hope she lets you do it again!
Michele,
I'm just glad Pengy is in a warm, loving home and that she IS beginning to trust again. You are wonderful and I am so happy that you made such a breakthrough with her today!
I'm just glad Pengy is in a warm, loving home and that she IS beginning to trust again. You are wonderful and I am so happy that you made such a breakthrough with her today!
Well, you sure started my day in tears! I can only imagine how you must have felt touching her. My eyes were watering and my heart thumping just reading your post. You have so much love inside you and this dear sweet kittie is going to be so lucky to have you share it with her.
Hissy, I am going to do that experiment today. I'll see what she does...she tends to thump me, but she doesn't flee, so maybe it will work. (Somehow I missed your post yesterday - I'm sorry!). I'll let you know how it goes. Should be interesting. It's so hard to watch her for agitation signals and *not* look at her, too. I still haven't quite gotten that one worked out. LOLOL.
I know I can't dwell on her past; it's her future that I am trying to create with her. But it was still such a difficult thing to realize. And Chris, I know the day she sits in my lap is far far off, but that's o.k., we have the rest of our life to accomplish that.
She's still doing the rocker nap thing, too.
I'm just still so amazed at this cat....so wonderfully amazed.
Best-
Michele
I know I can't dwell on her past; it's her future that I am trying to create with her. But it was still such a difficult thing to realize. And Chris, I know the day she sits in my lap is far far off, but that's o.k., we have the rest of our life to accomplish that.
She's still doing the rocker nap thing, too.
I'm just still so amazed at this cat....so wonderfully amazed.
Best-
Michele
Oh my goodness Michele!!! I'm just grinning from ear to ear reading this!! She really is trusting you, not only to allow you to touch her, which is of course the HUGE step for her, but just in turning her back to you...giving you her most sensitive area, her Achilles heel that she knows is her most vulnerable part.
It's funny how individual, yet similar some ferals are. Your story took me back to not quite 5 years ago, to when Ophelia first allowed me to touch her. Granted she was still but a kitten and hadn't seen nearly the trauma that Penguin has, but she was still so very scared of us when she came into our lives. Like Penguin, playing was the first step for her (not too hard to convince her since she was still a little kitten!), but that first touch took so long...and when she did finally decide to allow it, she did just as Pengy did - she turned her back to me and waited. She tensed up for the intial touch, but once that was over she relaxed a bit. That was such a turning point for Ophelia. After that she allowed pets and loves, although always on her terms. But she has turned into SUCH a lover for Earl at least .
And she adores snuggles, and actually demands that someone snuggle her when she sleeps, whether that be Trent (who she forces snuggles on for naps
), Earl (who she asks and then demands to come to bed for afternoon naps sometimes...which she does sometimes get), or me at night.
Just wanted to share how far Ophelia has come since that first touch, which sounded so amazingly similar to Pengy.
It's funny how individual, yet similar some ferals are. Your story took me back to not quite 5 years ago, to when Ophelia first allowed me to touch her. Granted she was still but a kitten and hadn't seen nearly the trauma that Penguin has, but she was still so very scared of us when she came into our lives. Like Penguin, playing was the first step for her (not too hard to convince her since she was still a little kitten!), but that first touch took so long...and when she did finally decide to allow it, she did just as Pengy did - she turned her back to me and waited. She tensed up for the intial touch, but once that was over she relaxed a bit. That was such a turning point for Ophelia. After that she allowed pets and loves, although always on her terms. But she has turned into SUCH a lover for Earl at least .
Just wanted to share how far Ophelia has come since that first touch, which sounded so amazingly similar to Pengy.
