Ever made a big move?

I have lived in Texas all my life. I've lived in Dallas, Austin, and San Antonio. Around two years ago, my mother was diagnosed with Stage 4 Malignant Melanoma, and has been battling that all this time.

Sadly, the cancer has been getting more aggressive and it looks like there isn't a whole lot of time left. Probably a matter of months, if we are lucky. It has been a very stressful time and more emotionally upsetting than I can ever express. Once my mother is able to finally rest, my sister and I think it might be too difficult to stay in our hometown for now. We are both pretty young (I'm 25 in July, she's 20 in August) and we think that now would really be a great time for us to try out a different part of the country! We think it would be really nice to start fresh somewhere, and just be able to experience new things, rather than be here and dwell on sad things.

I am leaning toward the Pacific Northwest, although I have never been there. I just read things and see pictures and it really appeals to me. (And I actually feel invigorated by rain....)

I would like to hear about other places too. What do you guys think about where you are living, i.e. what do you like and dislike most about where you live? And I am even more interested in hearing from people who have lived in more than one area of the country and can make some comparisons.

From people in the northwest, especially Portland and Seattle, I'd like to hear what you think about the job markets, and also housing costs...

hmmm.. moving away sounds like a good move... i'm not staying in US so I can't tell you which part is good or bad... but I can wish you good luck in moving!

First let me say how sorry i am for your mum, this is sad time for all of you

I think it is a good idea to move on. You are both young and both of you will always have your memories of where you are now.

I love where i live because i'm only 15 minutes by train to the beach

Good luck with what you decide to do

sorry to hear about your mum - I can only imagine its a hard time for you and your sister - our thoughts are with you

I also cant comment on where you should move to because I arent in the US either - hey move to australia its great here hehe

My condolences as well on the loss of your mother. You are so young, its must be very difficult.

I have a different opinion than the people who have posted so far. I think that you have been through a very tramautic time, and you need some space to grieve and come to terms with your emotions and your life without your mother. Making a huge decision like this is not the best thing to do until you have some time to recover from the stress of your mother's illness and death. I would think that you should stay put and deal with stuff for another year at least, until you know that you are strong and emotionally healthy again. I know that when my mother died, I was in shock for about 6 months, and was glad that I didn't have any big decisions to make. And I only realized it after the shock and stress started to abate.

Originally Posted by Brienne

I am leaning toward the Pacific Northwest, although I have never been there. I just read things and see pictures and it really appeals to me. (And I actually feel invigorated by rain....)

I would like to hear about other places too. What do you guys think about where you are living, i.e. what do you like and dislike most about where you live? And I am even more interested in hearing from people who have lived in more than one area of the country and can make some comparisons.

From people in the northwest, especially Portland and Seattle, I'd like to hear what you think about the job markets, and also housing costs...

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First, let me say that I'm really sorry about ur mom. I know that must be so heartrending to see her going thru that. My dad has a fatal disease (currently doing very good at this time) so I know what that feels like.

Secondly, I have lived in several places here in USA! I grew up in Utah then I lived in Arizona for about 10 months, then 2 months in California (Anaheim), Washington State (Tacoma) then I moved to District of Columbia and now live in Maryland.

I have seen some big differences between the West and the East. In my opinion, the West is a lot more open and friendly (there are some wonderful people in the East also but it takes longer to get to know them..)

Out here in the East, it takes FOREVER to get service (Running in, grab a carton of Milk then stand for 15 minutes in the checkout line is considered FAST!) compared to the West where u'd run in, grab a carton of milk then go through the checkout line within 5 minutes).

East tend to have more diversity/cultures compared to most states in the West..

Washington State IS very beautiful and GREEN.. As u know, it rains a lot and that can cause depression for some people. (It didn't bother me at all though! I enjoy rain also).

Pros/cons of where I have lived- it varies and some things I don't like, u might like.

I'd recommend u visit places that u think u might like to live and see if it meets ur needs/interests. (that's what helped me decide to move to Maryland- I visited CA (northridge) and DC -that visit helped me decide on DC because I saw for myself what it has to offer for me.

Job opportunities-it depends on what kind of field u're in/kind of job u want..

Hope this helps. Ur mom will be in my thoughts. Good luck with ur plans/future..

I am so very sorry about your Mom. Mine is currently battling breast cancer, so I know some of what you are feeling.

I will say I think it much easier to move at your age than later...this said as someone who married at 40 (!) for the first time, and moved from my hometown of Syracuse, NY to south of Seattle because this is where my husband lives.

I love the weather here in Puget Sound...yes, it is rainey (but was actually rainier in Syracuse!), but I love that it isn't freezing in the Winter, my roses bloom right through October, my primroses bloom almost year round. We might see 2-3 days of snow on the ground, for the most part, Winter here just means rain, and temps no lower than the 20's at night. Now...that is this part of WA...the eastern side is another matter and it gets very hot there...and if you do like to ski, just head up north and you'll find plenty...so the state offers a good bit of variety

Housing...hmmm.....Washington is very expensive...housing prices are heading a bit towards "California" style. My little Cape Cod that I sold in Syracuse would have gone for an additional $40,000 or more here...and certain areas i.e. Belleview, Issaquah are extremely expensive re housing. There is a corridor between Tacoma and Seattle, about 45 miles long, that gives you areas with more reasonable housing. You'll just need to research it well.

Jobs..WA has had it a bit rough, but latest news that I saw, things were on the upswing with jobs. I'm afraid I'm only familiar (and then not as much as my husband) with the IT industry, not sure what kind of field you want to be working in.

I know there are a number of other WA members on the board (not to mention lovely Oregon!) who will write in,

best wishes to you and your sister,

I'm very sorry to hear the news about your mom. I lost my brother in '91, and my dad in '02, so I know a bit about loss.

I grew up on the East Coast (Philadelphia), lived in Augsburg, Bavaria, for a year, went back to Philly, and then moved to southwestern Germany at age 25. I've been here ever since. In the meantime, my family has moved to Nebraska, so I spend about one month a year there.

I think you can live anywhere as long as you're adaptable (open-minded) and understand the language and culture. I agree with Pamela that there are some big differences between "back East" and "out West", but there are advantages and disadvantages to any place.

Great inputs and thanks for all the well wishes! I think what we may do is research 5 or 6 places and then narrow it down to 2, and then visit those places to see which fits best.

So far I still think I would like NW the best. It seems to have all the qualities I appreciate most in a city. My favorite place to live so far has been Austin, TX. It's so laid back and friendly. Kind of a "hippy" city, and the city really appreciates culture. And the downtown area is alive, versus Dallas, where most people wouldnt be caught dead downtown now, because its so run down and crime infested. Dallas is so materialistic too. I am getting pretty tired of that. I'd like to find an atmosphere where it is less about how much money you make or what you drive, and more about great quality of life.

The only drawback I see to West coast is the cost of housing! I looked around on the internet at some MLS listings for Seattle and Portland, and I nearly had a heartattack!! I guess that is a good aspect of living in Texas. Compared to what you get in the Northwest, you really get ALOT of house for your money in Texas. My two bedroom apartment now is around 1300 sq.ft. And coming up on 25, I would like to own a home, rather than throw away money on rent each month, like I have for the past 7 years. How things stand here, with what I have to work with here, if I were to start looking for houses, the average house I would look at would be between 1700-2000 sq.ft., and around $175k to $199k. That is average here. But the houses I saw and liked in the NW were like $400K! And that even seemed thrifty! Others were way beyond that. I was thinking "Dear God! You'd have to be a millionaire to live there!" I mean, my jaw was on the floor! It seems like you can't afford a house unless you are some VIP for Nike or Microsoft, or if you do something with a fancy title, like "consulting."

I would also have to think about where I could work. I have a marketing degree from University of Texas. I graduated Winter 2001, exactly 3 mos after 9/11. I can't think of a worse time to have graduated! Since then I have done sales and sales management, because I can do it and it pays the bills, but thats not what I like. So I would want to make sure there is something I would like to do wherever I go. No sense in jumping out of the frying pan, and into the fire, you know?

I think the Northeast would give me a bit of culture shock! Since I've been in Texas all my life, I've grown pretty used to the so-called "southern hospitality." I prefer some place where people are real easy to get to know. Also, at my job, I am on the phone alot with people from all over the country. EVERYONE asks me where I am from, because of my southern accent, but alot of people from the Northeast seem almost irritated by it!!! I think it is because people in the North talk very fast, and people in the south talk slower. It's kind of weird, because when I talk to people from the Northeast, they seem kind of abrasive sometimes. But I know they aren't really being mean, neither would they even probably consider themselves as being rude, but I think it just comes off to me as shortness.

At work, the nicest people to talkto on the phone end up being from the NW, Northern California, and Minnesota. But I think Minnesota would be too cold .

Huggles- I would LOVE to be in Australia! i have known of atleast two people that went there for a two week vacation, and then ended up moving there! I think if I were able to move out of country, the places I would consider would be Australia, UK, or the Netherlands. I spent the summer after I graduated high school in Amersfoort, Netherlands, and I absolutely LOVED the Dutch people and culture. There is something to be said of the quality and pace of life outside of America. Not that I don't like America. Not saying that at all, but people outside this country really have a good sense of the finer things in life, and they know how to relax and appreciate living. But I wouldn't even know where to start for moving to a different country!

Anyway, it's cool to hear about where everybody is at and has been. It let's you see that it's possible to step outside of your comfort zone and experience new things.

first of all let me say good luck with your decision to move. Its a big decision but it seems to me that your doing some research instead of just making a rash decision - this is important.

I would LOVE to be in Australia! i have known of atleast two people that went there for a two week vacation, and then ended up moving there!

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ahhhhh we are a nice bunch hahaha

I spent the summer after I graduated high school in Amersfoort, Netherlands, and I absolutely LOVED the Dutch people and culture.

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I worked in Gouda & Amsterdam in the netherlands for almost a year and I LOVED IT!!!! you are so correct - the Dutch people are amazing from my experience - although the weather didnt totally agree with me!!!
I remember the first day it snowed - I was working on a construction site and couldnt believe it was snowing (I have actually seen snow, and lived in SD, USA in winter - but have never seen in begin to snow at the beginning of winter) - anyway I literally put down my things and said - "I quit" - everyone looked at me and said "what?????" and I laughed and said - "look its snowing I wanna go play" they just called me the crazy aussie chick - in that day I watched it go from green to white - I LOVED IT - 3 days later I was over it and back at work

anyway - enough of being off the topic - I was going down a trip from memory lane there

good luck again with your decision - I am so very sorry to hear about your mother - it must be such a hard thing to deal with - I couldnt even imagine it - I wish you all the strength and love you need at this time

I'm sorry, to hear about your mother. Mine has been chronically ill, for almost 4 years. I have to agree with the previous posters, who suggest that you not make any big decisions, right after your mom passes. When Mom goes, I know that I will feel better, surrounded by familiar people, places and things.

If/when you DO decide to move, look into Arizona and Nevada. Both places have growing job markets, low taxes and housing costs. Both have cultural attractions, recreation, good universities and a wide variety of shopping and dining choices.

Here, in Tucson, the median price for a brand-new 4-bedroom 2-bath home is $135,000. We bought our 50-year-old remodeled brick house (3 bedrooms, 1 bath and family room) 3 1/2 years ago, for $90,000. It is now valued at around $130,000. We're in a gentrified middle-class neighborhood.

You can get a nice-sized 1-bedroom apartment, in a good building, starting at $350.00 per month, plus utilities.

When I retire, if I decide to relocate, it will be to the Las Vegas area. Plenty to do, low taxes and good medical facilities (as one gets older, the last one is important).

I am sorry to hear about your mother

I live in Houston, so I won't be too much help...
but I did visit Seattle 3 years ago and loved it!!