Update on 5 year old that loves kitty too much

The only thing that seems to be working is the one hand rule and even then she has lapses So, I give her the 3 warning rule with it. If I catch her trying to hold the kitten on the third warning she gets sometime that she enjoys taken away from her for the day. What is really effective is taking a 'Princess' movie away. Since that has happened she has never gone beyond 3. But as I said she still does try to pick him up. So perhaps I may lower it to the 2 warning rule. And if necessary 1 warning if that doesn't work. Or I could say she can play with her best little friend Mary for a few days. That may work too. Will have to play it out to see what works best. At any rate, I am having some success and that's what counts. Thank you so much for your responses. They are definitely apprecicated.

Diane

*Putting on my child psychologist hat* I recommend going to a one warning rule. Warn her once and if she does it again, immediately give her the negative consequence. Make sure that you take away her special thing immediately -- a five year old's memory isn't good enough for a consequence that comes later. The research shows that consequences work best with young children when they are immediate, strong, and given consistently. Also, because she is a five-year-old, don't take away anything for more than a day because her five year old brain won't remember on day two what she did wrong on day one -- even if you remind her.

Also...and this is very important...make sure that you give her lots of praise when she is using the one hand to pet the kitten. Tell her "Oh! I like the way you are using one hand!" or "oooh! You're petting with one hand! What a good girl you are!" The more you reinforce her with praise for doing what's right, the less likely she will be to slip and do what's wrong.

I'm glad things are going so much better.

I did (do) exactly what lotsocats suggests. When it comes to the kitties, only one warning and then the consequences. When it comes to something dangerous (like stepping off a curb or walking in a parking lot without holding a hand gets IMMEDIATE consequences. But for kittes? 1 warning and then it's over. I have explained to her that this is because the kitty has rights, too, as a living being. The kitty has a right not to be harrassed.

I'm SO glad that the rule is helping, though. Now just get some soft paws on that kitty and you'll be set!