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Kitty does not like anyone

post #1 of 6
Thread Starter 
I am desperate for advice. I have a 3 year old tabby cat named Lily. She is like no other I have had before. She plays fetch and rides around on my shoulders. We cuddle together and she sleeps with me. I spoil her rotten, she is allowed to walk on counters and claw at the carpet. The couch however is off limits and she minds this rule very well. My boyfriend is a true cat lover, but has different rules than I. Lily used to tolerate him and than one day it all ended. When he tries to pet her she will bite and scratch him. She will glare at him for hours and when he stays over she lies right in the middle of us. I don't want to scold her, because I know there is a power struggle between the two of them. They are like two children battling it out. What am I to do. He is around all of the time, and I sort of feel stuck in the middle. Any suggestions?
post #2 of 6
Hi Swalker and welcome.

Sounds like your kitty is a bundle of love - she's just hostile towards your boyfriend. Chances are she's scared him so she's attacking out of self defence.

Read this thread

and tell me what you think.
post #3 of 6
Thread Starter 
I think you are right. Too bad it is not just him she attacks. She's gotten my grandpa, parents and friends. I will never declaw her or file her teeth, which some people have told me to do (Barbarians!) She has attacked me on occassion as if she is hunting me. When she stalks me I just face her, like they said face your fear and it will go away. Other than these slim times, she truly is a bundle of joy. I love her with all of my heart.

I will try the advice given to novice333, and see if it works. I wonder how she would handle it if I were to get another kitty. Is she to old by this point? I fear she would harm it or worse off kill it if I brought something home. She has always been the #1 in my life. I really think this problem of hers is control and jealousy. Maybe I give her too much credit, for thinking like one of us.

thanks for the advice, I am going to give it a shot.

[Edited by swalker on 02-08-2001 at 07:20 PM]
post #4 of 6
It's hard to say how she will react to another cat. I've never heard of one cat actually killing another in these circumstances, not even seriously injuring one another, but things could get rough, especially at the beginning.

You will need to introduce them to each other very gradually and it might take a long time, but it has the potential of turning into a nice friendship.
post #5 of 6
Cats are really social creatures and getting a cat for your cat could end up being the answer for all of you. When I have people coming to adopt and their present cat is 2 to 5 years old I tell them to bring the new kitty home (make sure it is younger than your cat, but not a kitten) and put the new cat is a room of its own with food and litter for 24 hours, allowing your cat to smell the new cat through the door during that time. Then have your boyfriend take the new cat out of the room and let your cat run through the room smelling the new cat. After about 15 minutes take your cat out of the room and put the new cat back in. Do this for a couple of days, knowing while you are at work they are getting to know each other through the door. After 3 or 4 days, open the room. Your cat will figure that she has smelled the other cat forever and although she will hiss and let him know she is the boss, they will have some sort of peace between them. Eventually they will be good friends - you will not know it at first because she will make it a point not to be nice when you are around them. But while you are at work, they will be friends. When you adopt your new friend, go to an organization that fosters their cats like we do so they know the personality. Get a laid back, friendly neutered male about 8 to 10 months old. Good luck.
post #6 of 6
Thread Starter 
I am pretty silly when it comes to my Lily (hehe). I feel sometimes that if I were to get another cat, my princess wouldn't feel like number 1 and would then resent me in some way. I have been reading around in the different forums and the same conclusion is everywhere... two kitties are better than one.

Maybe I will try the suggestions given to me. I would love for Lily to have a companion. She is a girl, would a boy be wise or another girl?
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