Mum-in-law’s visit
When we are lucky enough to have a lovely mother-in-law, we look forward to her visits. No matter how much you love her there are some important rules. If you upset Mum you upset HIM. Here are the latest tips for that longed for day ……
DO remember to welcome her with a smile, even if you have just had a steaming row with her beloved son.
DON’T look shocked when you see an enormous dog stood next to her at the front door. He might be friendlier than he seems, even if he is growling. Maybe he just has wind.
DO speak nicely to the dog, and her, in case it isn’t wind; you may need your hands later.
DON’T forget to leave the front door open, to give your cat a quick get away. We have to help each other out at times like this.
DO feed him before anyone else. It is important to reinforce that he’s boss; even if it goes against the grain. You will be reinstated once he’s left.
DON’T shout at him when he wets the best rug. Half an hour’s scrubbing will soon fix it after they’ve gone.
DO send your children away for the day. This is in case they decide they want a dog ‘just like Nana’s!’
DON’T make a fuss when he chews up your best shoes. You will soon save up £50 for another pair. Remind yourself to put the next pair away before he arrives.
DO get plenty of air freshener in stock to disguise any accidents other than wet ones. After he’s gone it will only take another half hour’s scrubbing and disinfecting to get things back to normal.
DON’T worry if he sits 6 inches away from your chair at the dinner table, especially if he is staring into your eyes and drooling at the mouth. He only wants your dinner.
DO remember that if he sniffs your buttocks, you shouldn’t be embarrassed. It only means he likes you. In fact perhaps this is where you should let out a sigh of relief.
DON’T follow him into the back garden. There’s no use in getting upset at your prize plants being dug up, and thrown carelessly into that freshly dug hole in the new lawn.
DO remember to have lots of dog chewies in, unless you can afford to cook 3 full meals for the lot of you.
DON’T sit watching the clock, wishing it were nearly time for them to go. He might think it’s time to take you for ‘walkies’. This could turn out disastrous.
DO sound as if you mean it when ask Mum, and dog, not to leave it too long before they come back to visit.
DON’T smile when she says she is never coming back again, because you are totally intolerant.
When we are lucky enough to have a lovely mother-in-law, we look forward to her visits. No matter how much you love her there are some important rules. If you upset Mum you upset HIM. Here are the latest tips for that longed for day ……
DO remember to welcome her with a smile, even if you have just had a steaming row with her beloved son.
DON’T look shocked when you see an enormous dog stood next to her at the front door. He might be friendlier than he seems, even if he is growling. Maybe he just has wind.
DO speak nicely to the dog, and her, in case it isn’t wind; you may need your hands later.
DON’T forget to leave the front door open, to give your cat a quick get away. We have to help each other out at times like this.
DO feed him before anyone else. It is important to reinforce that he’s boss; even if it goes against the grain. You will be reinstated once he’s left.
DON’T shout at him when he wets the best rug. Half an hour’s scrubbing will soon fix it after they’ve gone.
DO send your children away for the day. This is in case they decide they want a dog ‘just like Nana’s!’
DON’T make a fuss when he chews up your best shoes. You will soon save up £50 for another pair. Remind yourself to put the next pair away before he arrives.
DO get plenty of air freshener in stock to disguise any accidents other than wet ones. After he’s gone it will only take another half hour’s scrubbing and disinfecting to get things back to normal.
DON’T worry if he sits 6 inches away from your chair at the dinner table, especially if he is staring into your eyes and drooling at the mouth. He only wants your dinner.
DO remember that if he sniffs your buttocks, you shouldn’t be embarrassed. It only means he likes you. In fact perhaps this is where you should let out a sigh of relief.
DON’T follow him into the back garden. There’s no use in getting upset at your prize plants being dug up, and thrown carelessly into that freshly dug hole in the new lawn.
DO remember to have lots of dog chewies in, unless you can afford to cook 3 full meals for the lot of you.
DON’T sit watching the clock, wishing it were nearly time for them to go. He might think it’s time to take you for ‘walkies’. This could turn out disastrous.
DO sound as if you mean it when ask Mum, and dog, not to leave it too long before they come back to visit.
DON’T smile when she says she is never coming back again, because you are totally intolerant.
