New cat, very timid...any ideas for gaining trust?

I recently adopted a 3 year old neutered Himalayan male. He is such a sweet cat I have noticed signs that he was probably abused. Flinching when you come near etc. He has gotten a little better over the past week. I notice he seems to let his guard down one day, then withdraw the next. I do so want him to be a lap cat. Any ideas on what I can do to ease his fears and gain his trust?

I bought him from a breeder who didn't want him because he was neutered. So I don't think he wasn't "worth" anything to his past 2 owners (both breeders) because he couldn't produce.

Who couldn't love this fluffball
It is obvious there is a very sweet kitty inside that long hair........help!

First of all...thank you soooo much for adopting this cat. Trust is a matter of time...and it will be on the cat's terms. Do not expect an immediate lapcat but if you give this guy plenty of attention and respect him when he pulls away....over time, I'm sure he will be more and more loving to you.

Good Luck,

Katie

Some things you can do:

1. Sit near him while he eats and read out loud to him softly (sit on the floor)
2. Don't make sudden movements toward him, try to get down to his level whenever possible
3. Avoid looking him in the eyes- they can consider this threatening
4. Use an interactive toy to play with him, something like a toy on a string- make this supervised though kitties think string is a mouse tail.
5. Use catnip to release his inhibitions, put a small pinch of it on the floor and let him just roll in it.
6. If he hides don't go after him, just let him be, he will come out when he feels safe.

Originally Posted by Mala Momma

I recently adopted a 3 year old neutered Himalayan male. He is such a sweet cat

I have noticed signs that he was probably abused. Flinching when you come near etc. He has gotten a little better over the past week. I notice he seems to let his guard down one day, then withdraw the next. I do so want him to be a lap cat. Any ideas on what I can do to ease his fears and gain his trust?

I bought him from a breeder who didn't want him because he was neutered. So I don't think he was "worth" anything to his past 2 owners (both breeders) because he couldn't produce.

It is obvious there is a very sweet kitty inside that long hair........help!

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Hi Mala Momma,

I, too adopted a female rescued cat two years ago. She was one year old when I got herand I think she was abused. Nina was so frightened that she would hide and just hiss and growl whenever I came near. I just let her be and let her explore her surroundings and gradually get used to me. I would sit near her and talk to her and play with her with one of those long fishing pole toys. She gradually learned to trust me more and more. It took over a year. About a year ago I adopted a three month very socialized male kitten just for her. They took to each other almost immediately. Benji taught Nina not to fear people and she saw that nothing bad happened when Benji jumped on my lap. Nina started sitting next to me closer and closer and I discovered that she just loves to be petted, so I pet her a lot and she allows me to do so now. She even sleeps on my bed at the end. I realize that she may never be a lap cat. Nina always follows me and like to sit next to me. She is a very gentle cat. Of course, now Benji no longer sits on my lap. He has become very independent - must be the terrible twos - but that's another story. Just be patient with your beautiful cat and give him lots of love. It takes time. But the efforts are well worth it. I wouldn't part with my Nina and Benji for anything. Hope this helps. Mayflower.

Mayflower that is a beautiful story, and the ending is a result of a lot of patience on your behalf.

Hello Mala Momma and welcome to TCS. I would follow the advice already given to you on previous posts. You are going to need a lot of patience, no matter how much you long for him to sit on your lap don't be tempted to try and force him. Let him make all the rules up and he will let you be his in the end.