What is Your First Memory, and (optional) Does That Memory Reflect Your Personality

mom of franz · May 2, 2004

My first memory occurs when I'm four yrs old. My fraternal twin and I and my then 1yr old brother were sitting for a group picture at a professional photographer. I even remember the flouncy puffy dress my sister and I wore...ITCHY! While the photogapher was setting up and playing with stuffed animals to make my brother smile, I got an idea. I have a little flat mole on the palm of my right hand. It is almost completely faded how, but my Mother called it my "beauty mark." She made me proud that she loved it so! While waiting for the photographer, I told myself to be sure to have my palm up, so I could get my beauty mark in the picture. Alas...my beauty mark never got seen.

In retrospect I see a lot of my personailty here. People pleaser (I think many nurses are). Though after years of therapy, I'm better. And trying all I can to make my mother happy. My mom was mentally ill, so it doesn't surprise me that I longed to make her happy. Guess I picked up on something not right with her even at 4. Kids are so intuitive!

cilla · May 2, 2004

Love the story about your beauty mark Barbara. That's the kind of thing I probably would have done. Sorry about your Mum. It's not easy I know, but she is so lucky to have you as a daughter.

My earliest memory was when I was three and I had pneumonia. I was ill in bed for weeks and when the pneumonia had gone I wouldn't eat at all, and the doctor thought they were going to lose me. My uncle was on leave from the army (Mothers brother) and he went to the chippy and bought me fish and chips. He sat on the bed and fed me one chip at a time and one broken piece of fish at a time. That was the start of my recovery. He has always been my hero and now that you ask the question I wonder if this is why???

sammie5 · May 2, 2004

I have four memories that were pretty early. The thing is, I don't really know when some things happened, so some may be from when I was 4, or 5, or 3, I have no way of dating them.

I had eye surgery when I was 18 months old, and can remember being in the big metal crib at the hospital, looking through the bars at other kids. I bet I was really scared, that's why I remember it. I can even remember the pyjamams I was wearing, I asked my mom years later about it, and she said, yes, they let her put me in pj's from home.

I remember looking in the basinette at my baby brother, he was wearing a cute little knitted baby outfit that my grandmother had made. He's 2 1/2 years younger than I am. We found that outfit when we were cleaning out stuff from dad's house. That was more than 45 years ago!

I can also remember playing in the living room, I would stand on my head, propped up in the corner of one big comgy chair. That may be significant, I still see things differently from other people.

And when the song "Standing on the corner, watching all the girls go by" was a hit on the radio, I would run to the corner of the room, and hide behind the door, peering out the crack on the hinge side of the open door, pretending I was secretly watching for girls. I'm pretty sure I didn't understand the song. That song was written in 1956, so I was probably under 5 when it hit the radiowaves in my little town,

kumbulu · May 2, 2004

My earliest memory is being given a bath in a kitchen sink. A man walks in the door on the left hand side. That's it. I must have been quite small to fit into the sink but I don't know how old. My world was very blurry from when I was born as I had very poor vision. I got glasses at 18 months old when people realised I couldn't see, which improved things a lot. This memory is in that blurry vision so I'm not sure if I didn't have glasses yet or I didn't have them on because I was having a bath.

I don't think this memory has influenced my life or reflects my personality as it was too short to be really significant.

deb25 · May 2, 2004

What a cool thread!

My first memory is a very vague image of a friend coming over to our apartment in the Bronx to play. I was under the age of 3.

The first memories I have that are solid are of experiences I had in Kindergarten. Two stand out. I remember that one day during rest time I was wearing a kilt that my grandparents had brought me from Wales. I knew I would catch hell if I came home with it dirty, so I asked the teacher if I could put my restmat on the table instead of the floor. She said, "No", so I remember resting all bunched up and trying very hard not to let any of the kilt go off the mat and touch the floor.

The second memory involved our workbook form Kindergarten. I remember it being our only real written work. I was proud because I had never gotten anything wrong in the workbook all year. I was absent one day, and the teacher sent home my workbook for me to do the make-up page. It was one of those mazes where you had to draw the path from beginning to end. I had never done one before and did not know that lines across the path were 'fences' that you couldn't cross and you had to find another way to reach the end. I turned it in when I got back to school and, of course, it had big red Xs on it where I had crossed the fences. I remember feeling embarrassed that I got a page wrong and felt it was quite an injustice because I didn't understand the directions.

Both of those instances did pretty well reflect my personality as a young child. I was eager to do the right thing, but I was too shy to speak up when I needed to.

chester&piper · May 2, 2004

My earliest memory is the day I came to live with my grandmother and my aunt when I was almost 3 years old. I had been living in a foster home before then because my biological mother decided she didn't want me. The guy she was seeing (who I believe was my biological father) gave her an ultimatum: him, or me. She chose him. My grandmother didn't want me living in foster care (and I guess it wasn't a very nice place), so she went to court and got custody of me and became my guardian until she passed away when I was 13. Then my aunt took over that responsibility.

I don't remember anything before that day, but I remember coming "home" and being happy that I was finally with people who loved me.

kiwideus · May 2, 2004

Linda, I am sorry that this happened to you.

My earliest memory was when I was about 2-3 years old, I had drank something and so my parents took me to the hospital and I remember staying in the childrens ward and eating weetbix for breakfast (I HATE weetbix!)

Deb - when I was younger, I was always eager to please but also too shy to speak up.

yoviher · May 2, 2004

Well, I am the youngest one here, but my earliest memories are the years when I lived in Culebra, (a small town on a small island named Culebra belonging to Puerto Rico which is equally between the PR mainland and the island St. Thomas in the US Virgin Islands) where I was around 18 months to four years old.

One of the memories that I remember the most is my mother teaching me to read. She was teaching me to read by the time I was 2-3 years old. I remember how she would put small laminations with simple Spanish words and I would read them to recognize them.

Another memory that I remember is a german lady (who spoke a very accentuated and broken Spanish) who lived near our house and had in her yard full of geese, which would bite anyone who ventured too close (who needs guard dogs with those birds?) and that I would walk between the geese with no problem and even play around them and in some cases even push them around. Of course my mother was histerical trying to get me away from the geese.

The other thing I remember was that although I would often appear with a baby chick or something like that, I once appeared with a kid! An American kid who spoke not a word of Spanish, whom I had found walking nearby and went talking with him and playing with him and brought him to my house. (I don't know how on earth did I talk to him as I did not speak English back then and he did not speak a word of Spanish). So after that my parents had to start searching for his parents all over the island.

Since Culebra is the beggining of the lesser antilles and is so close to the rest of the lesser antilles, and was a sea port it was fairly common to find foreigners.

deb25 · May 2, 2004

Originally Posted by Kiwideus

Deb - when I was younger, I was always eager to please but also too shy to speak up.

Kellye:

As you all can see, that has changed.....

mom of franz · May 2, 2004

Originally Posted by Mom of Franz

My first memory occurs when I'm four yrs old. My fraternal twin and I and my then 1yr old brother were sitting for a group picture at a professional photographer. I even remember the flouncy puffy dress my sister and I wore...ITCHY! While the photogapher was setting up and playing with stuffed animals to make my brother smile, I got an idea. I have a little flat mole on the palm of my right hand. It is almost completely faded how, but my Mother called it my "beauty mark." She made me proud that she loved it so! While waiting for the photographer, I told myself to be sure to have my palm up, so I could get my beauty mark in the picture. Alas...my beauty mark never got seen.

In retrospect I see a lot of my personailty here. People pleaser (I think many nurses are). Though after years of therapy, I'm better. And trying all I can to make my mother happy. My mom was mentally ill, so it doesn't surprise me that I longed to make her happy. Guess I picked up on something not right with her even at 4. Kids are so intuitive!

OH Cilla, I love that! Every kid deserves a hero!!!

That's how it was for me and my Manchester grandfather, he took me everywhere with him, he was my Official New York City Tour Guide! And he's how I learned about birds and flowers too! Ahhh, we were lucky Cilla!

chester&piper · May 2, 2004

Originally Posted by Kiwideus

Linda, I am sorry that this happened to you.

Kellye, thanks for the hug.

Even though it was a pretty awful thing to have happen, I know that I've lived a much better life with my grandmother and aunt than if I had lived with her. I don't think I'd be the person I am today, and I wouldn't have had the opportunity to get to know my grandmother like I did.

rapunzel47 · May 2, 2004

My first memory is from probably about age two or so.

My memory of the place we lived is sketchy -- we moved from there just before my fourth birthday -- but a few details stand out. One is that there was a long flight of stairs from the outside door to the inside door of our apartment, and that door was about mid-way on a long hall that ran the length of the apartment. All the rooms were off the other side of the hall, so that door was the only one on that side. And I was absolutely dead certain that there was a bogeyman living on top of the door. Where I got that idea, I'll never know, but I can still feel the lump in the pit of my stomach when I think of it -- and let's just say it wasn't yesterday. Needless to say, if I had to pass by that door without an adult's company, I did so very quickly.

And I never told anyone about this until years and years later, though I've never understood why not. There has never been any reason to believe I wouldn't have been protected and comforted. I don't remember what the occasion was when I told Mum, who was positively appalled that I had lived through this fear without saying anything. "OH! Dear! If only I had known!"

Does it say anything about my personality today? Off the top of my head I would have said no, but as I think about it, I realize that there are times when I really have difficulty asking for help, when it's almost an obsession that I must solve this [whatever it is] on my own. Other times, it seems perfectly natural to seek assistance. I'm not sure what determines which it will be in any given case.

lilysmom · May 2, 2004

My earliest memory is really fuzzy, and I didn't even realize it was a memory and not a dream for awhile. All I remember is walking down a hallway into a room that had a bed with a red bedspread. I didn't think much of it until I was looking at old family photos when I was a teenager and saw a picture of me, looking at books on a red bedspread. I asked my mom about it, and it was the apartment that we lived in for 3 months shortly after my 2nd birthday.

The next two are when we lived in the apartment after that, when I was still two. One was when I was on the back porch and my dad called me a little sucker. I said that must be because I sucked my finger. My other memory is when my dad cut my toast diagnally, into two triangles, instead of down the middle.

coco maui · May 2, 2004

Originally Posted by Chester&Piper

My earliest memory is the day I came to live with my grandmother and my aunt when I was almost 3 years old. I had been living in a foster home before then because my biological mother decided she didn't want me. The guy she was seeing (who I believe was my biological father) gave her an ultimatum: him, or me. She chose him. My grandmother didn't want me living in foster care (and I guess it wasn't a very nice place), so she went to court and got custody of me and became my guardian until she passed away when I was 13. Then my aunt took over that responsibility.

I don't remember anything before that day, but I remember coming "home" and being happy that I was finally with people who loved me.

Linda,
We have similiar early childhood situations. When I was about 3 years old my parents went through a nasty divorce and neither was able to caree for me so i went to live with my grandparents for 2-3 years until my Dad finally won custody of me. my fondest childhood memories are from the years I lived with my grandmother and grandfather. My grandmother died when I was 13 also. She was so special to me, it was like loosing my mother.
The good part of this story is that I lived a happy childhood with my father from then on and I kept close contact with my mother who is now my best friend

As for my first memory, I am not exactly sure which is the first but I think it is getting bathed in the sink as a child by my grandmother. She was very nurturing and her and my grandfather's love stuck with me for a lifetime

valanhb · May 2, 2004

What a cool thread!

My first memory is being at the rifle range at a match my Dad was shooting in. I was playing with some kids on the swing set and I fell down, so I ran over to find my mother, crying. I went to the first woman I see and grab her legs and then realized this wasn't my mother! What's funny is that I stepped back and looked her up and down just like they do in the movies.

My mother was in the group of women and was laughing so hard when I did that!

What's interesting is that Dad gave up shooting competitively when I was between 3 and 4 years old, because he just couldn't afford to stay at the level he was at with two small children. (There are still a couple National Records that he holds from over 25 years ago!) So I didn't even realize that he had done it, let alone been one of the top in the nation. I got into the same competitive shooting game via a friend of mine in high school, and shot at the same rifle range. It was like deja-vu when I went up there the first time, saw the same swing set, and could tell almost exactly where the group of women had been when I did that.

abby7625 · May 2, 2004

My first memory is being in Riley Children's Hospital having my hips x-rayed when I was 2 years old. I had to walk down the hall to my mom in my undies so the dr. could see which hip and leg turned in. I didn't want to do it and I remember she was really far away (my mom swears it was only a few steps). I think it has affected my personality because I still feel incredibly uncomfortable running around partially dressed even when Im alone.

lorie d. · May 2, 2004

Both of my earliest memories are of my baby sister and I was 2 1/2 to 3 years old.

My very first memory is of me holding a doll and mothering it while my mom bottle fed my sister.

My second memory is of my mom going into my baby sister's room one morning, and then coming out of the room without the baby and crying.
Then an ambulance came...

Years later, mom talked about what happened that morning. When she went to my sister's room, she found the baby lying very still in her crib and noticed the baby's coloring was extremely poor. The baby was unresponsive and couldn't be woken up, so mom thought she had lost her to SIDS.

The good news is that it wasn't SIDS... my sister is still alive today and is enjoying excellent health.

justplainheidi · May 3, 2004

My earliest dateable memory is also of my little sister. I was two and visiting my mom and the new baby in the hospital. I recall having to put on a protective gown and washing my hands in the room's bathroom sink with bright pink soap so I'd be clean enough to hold the baby.

Shortly after, I began having dreams of holding and dropping my little sister in the basement of our church's school. She broke into a million pieces like glass when she hit the floor and I don't recall perceiving it as a nightmare. I guess that says a lot about my resentment towards becoming the forgotten middle child!

jcat · May 3, 2004

Great thread! My first conscious memory is "moving day" - we moved into a new house the month I turned two. I remember the furniture being more or less in place, but there were lots of boxes, and I went "dancing" into the dining room and was startled when I caught sight of myself in a big mirror propped against the wall. That mirror hung over the buffet for the next decade! I don't know what it says about my personality, but mirrors/reflected images can still startle me. I laugh now at JC, because he has the same reaction. We have a full length mirror in the bedroom, and when he sees his reflection, he runs over to "dance" - he puts his paws all over the mirror. I remember the backyard being an overgrown "jungle" when we moved there, and my dad burning honeysuckle. My next memory is of my grandmother (widowed) and mother discussing the former's getting remarried while drinking coffee in the kitchen - which she did when I was not quite 3. After that - telling Happy, our dog, that she was going to get in trouble for wiping spaghetti sauce off her mouth on the gray rug in front of the radiator (it must have been in the living room or dining room - can't remember), and my Uncle Bill (my grandmother's eldest brother) out in my grandmother's backyard at sundown, showing me how the petals on a flower closed as the sun went down - he died when I was three. I really don't have any "in-between" memories, though. After that - meeting my best friend throughout grade school when we were four - over a dead rat in the field behind our backyard. Morbid thoughts at such an early age?

vinceneilsgirl · May 3, 2004

Originally Posted by Kiwideus

Linda, I am sorry that this happened to you.

My earliest memory was when I was about 2-3 years old, I had drank something and so my parents took me to the hospital and I remember staying in the childrens ward and eating weetbix for breakfast (I HATE weetbix!)

Deb - when I was younger, I was always eager to please but also too shy to speak up.

Ok...what's Weetbix? Is it like Wheaties?

My earliest memory is of my cousin Brandy dying. I was two. She died of SIDS. She had been dead for hours but the paramedics still tried CPR on her. Her face looked all bruised when she was lying in the casket. When I was older I asked my doctor about that and he said that it was from the CPR...that its harder on babies than it is on adults.

Otherwise, I don't have many childhood memories. My childhood kind of sucked. Sometimes I think that's part of the reason I'm an activist...why focus on your own pain when you can focus on the pain of others?

What is Your First Memory, and (optional) Does That Memory Reflect Your Personality

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