New cat follows resident cat

Hi everyone!

I am currently (sort of) fostering to adopt a deaf cat named Audrey. Long story, but she's had some bad homes, and I'm hoping this ends up being her forever home. Her original owner is cautious but optimistic. She wants to see how Audrey does here, and if she can be truly happy and well cared for (I think she can). Her original owner can't keep her because her two resident cats pick on Audrey, but she wants to find her a good home after a few bad ones.

Anyhow, Audrey has been here for over a week, and has been following my resident cat Dollie around. She's not chasing her, but if Audrey sees Dollie heading somewhere, she'll get up and follow her. She always stays near Dollie, and will just sit and watch what she's doing. When Dollie goes somewhere else, Audrey follows. Dollie doesn't seem to mind, and doesn't seem upset by it, maybe just a little perplexed at times. She is being great with Audrey and I'm very proud of her.

They are newly acquainted, so there is still some growling when they approach each other too closely (a foot or two), mostly from Audrey. Very little hissing or any of that, and that's usually from Dollie. Audrey has swiped at Dollie once or twice, but she was totally declawed by one of her bad owners, and doesn't hurt Dollie, and it was only when Dollie was forced to walk right past Audrey to get somewhere. It does seem like Audrey sets herself between Dollie and the exits to the room they're in at times, but she always allows Dollie to pass without incident, for the most part. Dollie does not reciprocate, and does not follow Audrey at all. Dollie does stare back/watch Audrey if Audrey is watching Dollie though. And what I find interesting is that Dollie often if not almost always has her back to Audrey, or is playing/eating/dozing/etc. I often pet and coo to Dollie to show Audrey that Dollie is okay, and that getting loving is a good thing.

When not interacting like this, they act normally, sleep in their own beds, eat their own food, etc. I have noticed that they are sharing a litter box though, even though I have another one. No one wants to use it though, even though Dollie used to use that box.

I think Audrey is still (understandably) uneasy because of her past history with other cats, but I get the sense that Audrey wants to be friendlier with Dollie. It just seems like she doesn't know what to do, how to be friends, and so is asserting herself. She's also tried out Dollie's bed (Audrey has her own nice bed), and Dollie wasn't too happy, but again, there was no fighting. And since Audrey is deaf, maybe she's taking longer to figure out how to interact with another cat on friendly terms (since the other cats in her life weren't very friendly).

One important thing: I was going to do a nice, show introduction with them, but my husband accidentally let the cat (Dollie) out of the bag (the basement, where she was overnight until I could start the process) at like 4:30 in the morning, and there was a minor altercation in the dark. I think either Dollie encountered Audrey and scratched her in offense, thinking her an intruder, or Audrey attacked Dollie and Dollie swiped back in defense. Either way, there's been no physical fighting since then, only the growling at times and rare moments of hissing by Dollie.

Does anyone know what this behavior is about? Audrey always starts off looking alert, with her tail tucked around her, but quickly lays down and sometimes closes her eyes while she "watches" Dollie. I'll post some pictures of them near each other. I can tell when it gets tense, and I try to distract them with treats and loving, but I don't have to do that very often. I've already gotten Audrey purring a few times, and she's scent marking stuff in the house, but has yet to head butt me or rub on me :-(

Anyhow, I find it all so fascinating!

It actually sounds like things are going pretty well. Introducing a cat with issues is never easy, but if the most that's happened is an occasional swipe or growl (minus the one-time altercation in the dark), then things are off to a good start. Audrey is being very cautious, and it's no surprise that she's nervous around Dollie. I once had a cat that was picked on by others in a feral cat colony, and things went really badly when we brought him home. Our resident cat was the sweetest lump ever but the new cat was still terrified of him because of bad experiences. It took time, but he learned the resident cat would do him no harm and after a very long time they became quite good friends.

Cats do speak in a lower tone than humans can hear, so if Audrey can't communicate since she's deaf, then it's likely that will slow down their progress. But if they're coexisting peacefully at the moment, it will probably only get better with time.

P.S. The introduction between ours was like yours. New cat was staying in a bedroom and we'd blocked it off with a baby gate and poster board so the other cat couldn't get in but they could see each other. Well, resident cat leaped 6 feet into the air and brought down the poster board and baby gate in a horrific crash that scared the new cat so badly he tore up my thighs (had been sitting on my lap) and hid behind the desk in the room for hours. It made everything more difficult.

@R-kins thanks for the reply! Yeah, I've heard it can take a looong time for cats to get used to each other, much less be simply friendly. I find it interesting that Audrey follows Dollie, yet Audrey is the one who tends to growl in warning. But again, she's had a difficult life so far, and is learning how to be friends with another cat, so it'll take time.

However, I did have some major progress with Audrey today with our own relationship. I went downstairs to feed her, and she started really meowing loudly, almost screeching, and tried to get my attention. I thought maybe she was hungry? No. Looking for Dollie? Nope. Litter box dirty? No, I had just cleaned it. Well, she REALLY wanted my attention, and practically jumped into my arms, purring super loud! She suddenly could not get enough scratches and petting from me. She rubbed herself all over me and practically bent herself backwards to look at me, purring, in utter delight. I've never seen a cat do that before. It was so sudden and so wonderful that I almost got choked up, ha ha. Very strange, but very welcome! I can only hope that things continue to progress as they have been. I'm very pleased.

That's amazing! Sounds like she's finally feeling safe! She's decided you're officially her human.

By the way, have you looked into Feliway? It's supposed to help relax cats and could help Audrey and Dollie feel more at ease around each other.

Yes, I have a diffuser running where they sleep/eat, and I also bought the spray for other areas. I plan to get another diffuser for the area they like to play in (mainly our dining room table, lol).

There still seems to be a lot of stalking/growling on Audrey's part. She never attacks Dollie, but sometimes Audrey gets too close to Dollie with the growling/staring and Dollie feels threatened, so she hisses. It's not often but it happens. Most of the time Audrey follows her around and watches her, almost like she's learning how to be a cat. Dollie does not seem stressed, and has actually become more playful and sociable since Audrey joined us. So to me, it still seems like Audrey is learning how to interact with Dollie in a friendly way, how to play with her (she does seem to like "play" stalking), etc.

And Audrey loves being picked up, which I'm not used to. Dollie, who is the friendliest cat I've ever had, will tolerate it, but doesn't seem to like it much. But Audrey will cry at me until I pick her up and stroke her, and she purrs like crazy/kneads my arm while I pet and hold her. But she still rarely rubs against me or my hand, even flinching at times, no matter how slow and careful I am, using a fist, approaching her from the front so she can see me, etc. It's weird. I guess I'm still learning how to interact too!

I think you have made great progress in 3 days!

I'm a bit confused as to which Audrey is. Many white cats are deaf in one ear, but I'm thinking Audrey is the other cat.

BTW, can't believe some cruel person had a deaf cat declawed.

Audrey is the deaf Turkish Van, and Dollie is my resident tabby. The total declawing is one big reason that the original owner took Audrey back, besides general neglect and the adopter's aggressive cats picking on Audrey.

Audrey seems to be acting somewhat aggressive yet submissive at the same time with Dollie. One minute she's staring Dollie down, in stalking mode, or swiping at her if Dollie has to walk by (sometimes Audrey sits where Dollie has to pass through). She has swiped at Dollie a few times. It's not playful, it's more aggressive/defensive. But then other times, Audrey will cry for me, and when I come to see what's wrong, she has me follow her over to Dollie's bed area, as if she wants me to make Dollie play with her. Audrey also shows some submissive/friendly behavior to Dollie like slow blinking, looking away, relaxed body, etc.

Dollie is annoyed and wary half the time, but she is still trying to interact with Audrey in a friendly way. My impression is that Audrey doesn't know how to act with a friendly cat because she's been with aggressive cats for so long. But Audrey REALLY seems to want to be with Dollie, to play with her, and to be near her too. It's weird.

Some of Audrey's behavior most likely stems from the fact that she feels vulnerable due to being deaf. She doesn't pick up on audible clues, obviously, and it sounds like she is very confused as to how to behave around Dollie. Poor thing. I am sure verything will work out eventually. It would be awful if she has to go someplace else.