My Little Monkey

On Monday I had to put my best friend to sleep. Monkey would have been 8 in March. She has dental surgery in April and was never quite right after. The specialist thought she had an inner ear infection, and every time we stopped her meds when she seemed to get better, she would get sick again. Eventually the meds stopped working and she went downhill very quickly.

I miss her terribly. I always look at the windows to see if she's laying in the sunlight. I wait for her to come to the kitchen when I make breakfast. I step around where her food dishes sat on the floor. My heart breaks every day when I realize she's not here anymore.

I can't help but wonder if there's more I could have done. If she understood why I decided to let her go. I know she's at peace now and no longer suffering, but I miss her so much and question if I did something wrong. She was at the vet every other week for months and they said I was doing great with keeping up with her treatment and her meds, but it's something I can't help but think about. And then there's the guilt for feeling relieved that it's finally over. I no longer have to worry if she's eating and drinking every day. I no longer have to worry if she's in pain or about trying to make her swallow medicine she hated.

I know it will take time to heal and to process everything. I guess I just needed to get it out and hope someone else knows the struggle I'm going through.

Rest In Peace now baby girl. Miss you always

I am so sorry for your loss and pain. Don't beat yourself up about it. You did your very best for Monkey, and you did it out of love. She knew she was loved, and she understood. It's been a hard time for you, too, so don't feel guilty because a burden has been lifted. There was nothing more anyone could have done.

You did what you did, with what you had at the time. But no matter what what you did, you did out of love and concern, so it can't be wrong. What you are going through is all part of the grieving process, the guilt, the feelings of helplessness and thinking you could have done more. It's because we are out of the crisis we were in then and can sit back and think deeper. When someone we love is in trouble all we can do is live in the moment and take one second at a time. It was Monkey's time to go, yes too young and yes too soon, because she was loved so much and a member of your family.But you tried to help her, to stop the inevitable, and it was all that you could do. Monkey is at peace now, secure in the knowledge that she was so very loved and will never be forgotten. She will always thank you for giving her such a wonderful home and for being there for her, it is all she ever wanted. The bond you have formed for eight years will never be taken from you, your love is now spiritual so is eternal. Time is the only thing that helps, it softens the sharp edges of grief until you can learn to make a new life's order for yourself, Until  you learn to live with the emptiness their going brings to us. Fill that emptiness with good deeds done in her name, it helps you to feel better about yourself and keeps her memory alive. Give your time at a local shelter, donate food or litter to your local pantry. One day you will be able to pass on that legacy of love that Monkey left you to another little one who so desperately needs what you have to offer and it will bring a welcome fullness back to your heart. My heart goes out to you, I will cry with you for the loss, take care........RIP sweet Monkey, you will always be held secure in that special spot in a heart that will love you forever.  You will be dearly missed but never forgotten!,   

I am so sorry for your loss and we all surely understand how you feel. I can't say it any better than the two posts above did, they summed it up perfectly, sometimes these horrible things just seem to happen. You will always love Monkey, but when the hurt starts to fade perhaps you will think about loving another little one who needs a good home and family.

I hope your heart heals a bit each day, God Bless.....

I am so very sorry about Monkey. Your loss is still so fresh. You did everything you could.

Rest in Peace Darling Monkey.

Mia

Tears here.

In reality, we know much less about cats that one can assume from so much internet information.   To do our best is all we can do.  Both owners and vets.

Love is what does count, we have no control on Faith.

Love drives us to care the cats and love makes us mourning.

Science and Love are the legs we walk on the way of cats care. Sometimes, Science can no longer walk and Love has to fly. We need the tears to heal and love again, bringing back the Love from flight to walk.

Head bow to rainbow cat and my hugs to you.