Please i need help

4 months ago i adopted a 4 year old cat after owners wanted to give up on him.

It took him a week to get used to me and we bonded perfectly..

In Recent weeks he is so anxious ,he stopped purring completely and my hands full of scratches and bites.

He is sleeping in a box most of the time..

I went to the vet and everything seems fine.
I am really frustrated and sad and clueless..
I want him to be happy I'm really disparate.

Please help me i don't know what to do.

4 months is not long for such a change in a cat's life. Has he been this way since he came to your home, or was he better at your house and now is worse?He may have a low stimulation threshold and after so many strokes he will then attack. Try just stroking him once and quitting. Then next time two, until you see if he has a limit. If this is a new change then something else has changed and is making him nervous. New neighbors, strange dog or cat in the neighborhood? If it is since you brought him home, that is normal, it may take 6 months or more for him to adjust. In the meantime, give him space, talk softly to him and offer him yummy treats

.Looking closely at his picture, I can see his eyes are dilated, indicating fear or unease. He is alert and curled into himself, showing fear and unease again.  Never stare him in the eyes, that is aggression to a cat. Let him hide if he wants, it is comforting. Never force him out of hiding, I wouldn't try to pick him up or move him at all right now. I think he just needs more time, no matter what, he is very afraid and needs to adjust. Some cats are just a lot more afraid of change than others. I have ONE cat out of 6 that is outgoing, so what you have is very normal.  Keep us posted and I'm sure there are others who will give you good advise. All the luck!

Does anyone else live with you that might be mistreating this cat?  Do you have any other animals that might scare your kitty?

What happened to cause his former owners to give up on him?

Hi,

Thank you for caring for your cat. He is adorable.

You mention after a week you bonded perfectly. Can you go into more detail about how you and your cat interacted?

Did anything change in the last few weeks? New people in and out of the house (workers?), any animals in and out of the house, any additional stress among the humans in the house? Anything different at all?

How did the bites and scratches come about?

We never want to force a cat to do something, we always try to go at the pace they want to go at.

Cat can take on our emotions so it can become a spiral. The happier we are the happier they can be and the more sad we are the more sad they can get.

How does he walk around? How is his tail (down or straight up)? Does he walk low to the ground?

I would start by using food to build that bond. Try to give food he likes and some special treats if possible. I like to give warm chicken meant (no bones). But good wet food, good treats also can create a bond.

Go at his pace, let him initiate contact. Let him rub on you etc. Don't force petting.

I would try to slowly start to play with him. But do it slowly so as not to scare him.

Does he have any cat trees and scratching posts? If not, adding some would be helpful.

Does he have comfy and warm beds to sleep in?

I am happy to help you through this. The more information you can provide the more I can hopefully help.

Hang in there, I have never seen a cat not eventually respond to being loved. Just try to be calm and confident around him and speak to him softly and confidently and lovingly.

I think we can get him back to his old self. I will be here for you so [please feel free to ask anything anytime.

Thank you all for helping me..
It's me and him alone in the apartment,sometimes friends come but I let him hide and he comes out only if wants to.

He have a scratching post, three warm places to sleep.
He prefet to sleep on the bed next to me.

When I'm walkin in the apartment most of the time he will be with his tail up.
When he start exploring alone the tail is wiggly.

I play with him twice a day .

The last owner had a little autistic child ,so i thought maybe he way to aggressive with the cat .

When i first got him he hissed at me and hide from me.. So i started giving him treats and tuna and while doing that i start pet him slowly until he start purring and tails up after few days to a week.

He now let me pick him up for a little while..never sits on my lap only when i am in bed he sleeps on my chest or near me.

I really don't think I'm doing somthing wrong..i thought about everything.. I even thougt about adopting another cat but it's not a possibility for me.

I really hope he will be happy and start being affectionate again.

Please anything you can think of and might help i will be grateful.

He's a beautiful cat !  I don't think you're doing anything wrong at all - it sounds like you're doing very well, in fact.  Coming from an home with a small child, your cat might be - as you have suspected - very cautious of people, but I think you're managing just fine - especially if he's already sleeping with you.  Be patient, and keep being his Friend !

.

1CatOverTheLine said:

He's a beautiful cat !  I don't think you're doing anything wrong at all - it sounds like you're doing very well, in fact.  Coming from an home with a small child, your cat might be - as you have suspected - very cautious of people, but I think you're managing just fine - especially if he's already sleeping with you.  Be patient, and keep being his Friend !

.

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My problem is that he suddenly changed.. He is always scared from something.

Nothing major happened recently.

It may be something happening while you are at work or gone, you might ask a neighbor if anything happens daily that causes loud noises. Maybe someone walks a big dog by at that time or a strange cat comes up. Eventually he will calm down and accept these changes, it is a setback but not something that can't be overcome. Sleeping by you at night is a HUGE start, he loves you enough to trust you when he is at sleep, and knows you will protect him.  He is scratching you because he is so afraid of whatever it is and it just overcomes him. Keep doing what you are doing, give it time and it will be fine, you are an angel to take him in, he knows that. We all have to EARN a cat's love and affection, you will find it is well worth it!

I am with the others, I think you are doing everything right. I think you are doing a great job!!

I can't figure out why the change. DI and Bob brings up a good point, maybe something during the day is causing stress.

Do any of your neighbors have animals? Next to you or above or below?

When does he scratch you? What happens before he scratches you? Does it happen in a specific place in your apartment or is it all over?

It could be redirected aggression. Something is bothering him but he takes it out on you. Very common. We just need to figure out what is bothering him.

I would just take the interactions at his pace. Keep giving him your love and good food. 

We'll figure this out. A lot of good people on this thread. Please feel free to share as much information as possible.

Keep up the good work and your love for him. Thank you for caring so much about him.

faizfaraj said:

My problem is that he suddenly changed.. He is always scared from something.

Nothing major happened recently.

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Cats are very scent oriented.  Could there be any new scents he really doesn't like?  

And if you're not always there, something might have happened that scared him, like some noise outside that you don't know about because you might have been gone while it happened.  

Years ago, my sister came over for a very brief obligatory visit.  Poor Oreo hid for hours after she left (she hates cats).  And he's not normally like that.  He's an alpha cat.  But his behavior didn't last more than those few hours though.  So if your kitty is still acting scared, there's still something scaring him.  Wonder what it is?

There is a window in the kitchen that he likes to sit on for a long period of time and just watch.
I figured it's better if i keep the window open so he have fresh air (there is bars on the window).

That never scared him but maybe he is smelling somthing out there?

If he hears someone or a car or anything basically,he runs to the window with wiggly tail and get back scared.


I joined some cat groups on Facebook and i see all those videos of cats and owners and i become frustrated and jealous to be honest.

What's wrong? Why he don't fully trust me?

I really tried everything

He'll probably either get over or get used to whatever it is that's scaring him.  Apparently it's not you because he became friendly to you.  Just give him a little more time.  I don't think there's anything else you can do. 

He looks like he does trust you.  He's sitting right by you with his paws stretched towards you.  He looks very relaxed indeed in the 2nd photo.  I really don't think he's scared of you at all but of something else.  

As mentioned above, maybe a new cat has moved in to your building, and he has been bullied by a cat in his previous home.  Or maybe you've introduced a new smell into the house that's confusing him.  Are you around other animals when you're out at work?  Or around chemicals or such like?  

Ask the rescue centre for more information on his previous home.

And, maybe shut your window for a while to see if that helps at all.

Try a Feliway diffuser plug, which gives off nice, friendly pheromones that can make a cat feel safe.  

Valerian is another option too, it's a herb which has a calming, happy effect. 

Hopefully, this is anxiety will pass, or reduce a lot anyhow, the longer he's with you.  It takes us all time to get used to a new neighbour or other stress.  He really does look as though he's very pleased to be near you, so given time, after he gets used to whatever it is that's bothering him right now, he will most likely open up and become a youtube cat 

Is he neutered?

I bought feliway and plugged it in ..waiting for results.

I think i will shut the window and try to see maybe the problem is outside.

He is not neutered but i asked the vet to book an appointment to do it.

I will be patient even though it's hard sometimes but i am never going to give up on him.

faizfaraj said:

I will be patient even though it's hard sometimes but i am never going to give up on him.

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You have already won the game; now it's just a matter of, "when."

.

I'm really glad i found this site.. I'm sure with your help i will get results.. Thank you all!!

faizfaraj said:

I'm really glad i found this site.. I'm sure with your help i will get results.. Thank you all!!

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Neutering will help a lot.

Looks like a lot of people chime into the topic but here's mine input. I have a feeling many shelter cats and dogs likelihood has some sort of behavioral and anxieties. I would give your new cat time to adjust and transition to his new owner (you) and his home. It's a big change.

Therefore I would give it 6 months for him to get used to you and the surroundings. Perry did exact same thing. I bought toys, treats, cat tree, window perch. A lot of nice petting now and then around the ears and neck, plus talking to your cat helps too. Cats unlike dogs don't do well with change, it takes them longer than dogs to adjust. Give him time.

Meanwhile take the time to learn about cats [emoji]128062[/emoji]

I think there is a lot of good advice above.

I do not think it is you, I think he trusts you.

I am with talkingpeanut, getting him neutered should help. 

Are you on the first floor?

Are there feral cats in your neighborhood? There could be intact males coming around and spraying causing him insecurity issues.

I have no doubt all will be fine because of your commitment. But I think we all will be here for you until that time.

Please do not take it personal, I do not think it is you at all.