Introducing new cat (with no kitty manners) to resident cat?

itspursonal

itspursonal

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Hi everyone,

So we've been trying to introduce a cat we adopted a few days ago to our resident cat, Coconut. WE've had them separated for a few days, have been swapping socks, blankets and other items with their scents to each other. We have them eat while separated by a thin opening in a sliding kind of door that allows them to partially see, hear and smell each other while eating, and they eat with no problems.

Coconut is an incredibly sweet cat, but if cats all think themselves to be princesses, she thinks she is a queen. She values her own personal space and has a slow methodical way of approaching new cats. Our new cat, is also a pretty affectionate and well socialized(with humans) cat. His problem is that he seems to be such a clownish lord of derpdom, especially when dealing with other cats. Today I let Coconut meet him for the first time and they both seemed pretty curious and positive. Her tail was up, he was trilling as he approached her... However, he just keeps coming. Coconut cautiously slows down to sniff noses, but this guy is like a train with no brakes. He ends up with his face all in her whiskers prompting her to back up and complain a few times.. But he.just.keeps.coming. This made Coconut hiss and growl at him, prompting me to separate them again immediately. 

I don't think there was any kind of aggression. The boy is 9 months old, smaller physically than Coconut and I think she sees no threat in him. I also don't think he is threatened by her because he seems to be just trying to head-bunt right away without the complicated protocols that her majesty coconut requires. The way he threw his face into hers is really identical to how he throws his face into our hands when he wants them all over his forehead.

Is it even possible for me to teach him how to approach her? Should I leave that to her? I am worried that she might be permanently turned off by him if I do that. Not to mention that she might teach him to always keep his distance from the scary bigger cat. I appreciate any advice!
 
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calicosrspecial

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Hi,

Even though there are positive signs so early on I personally would take it a little slower. I would follow the formal introduction process.

http://www.thecatsite.com/a/the-ultimate-yet-simplified-guide-to-introducing-cats

http://www.catbehaviorassociates.com/a-simple-little-trick-to-use-during-new-cat-introductions/

http://www.aspca.org/pet-care/virtual-pet-behaviorist/cat-behavior/introducing-your-cat-new-cat

http://jacksongalaxy.com/2010/10/01/cat-to-cat-introductions/

We want to associate each other with good things (food and play) and to try to make sure each interaction is as positive as possible. In my experience it is the resident cat that needs time to adjust to this new cat. So we want the resident cat (and both for that matter) to be view as a positive and not a threat. Rushing things can cause problems. I would just take things a little slower. He is being a kitten. Work to build their confidence during the introductions and take it a little slower.

I am happy to answer any question and to help you along through the process. The process works almost all of the time. Thank you so much for saving another life.
 
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itspursonal

itspursonal

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CalicosRSpecial said:
 
Hi,

Even though there are positive signs so early on I personally would take it a little slower. I would follow the formal introduction process.

http://www.thecatsite.com/a/the-ultimate-yet-simplified-guide-to-introducing-cats

http://www.catbehaviorassociates.com/a-simple-little-trick-to-use-during-new-cat-introductions/

http://www.aspca.org/pet-care/virtual-pet-behaviorist/cat-behavior/introducing-your-cat-new-cat

http://jacksongalaxy.com/2010/10/01/cat-to-cat-introductions/

We want to associate each other with good things (food and play) and to try to make sure each interaction is as positive as possible. In my experience it is the resident cat that needs time to adjust to this new cat. So we want the resident cat (and both for that matter) to be view as a positive and not a threat. Rushing things can cause problems. I would just take things a little slower. He is being a kitten. Work to build their confidence during the introductions and take it a little slower.

I am happy to answer any question and to help you along through the process. The process works almost all of the time. Thank you so much for saving another life.
Click to expand...
Can you help me understand any signs to look for that would tell me that they are ready to have supervised visits?

Is it a good idea to have the younger, new cat( just named Mr. Bean by my wife, due to his hilarious clumsiness) in a crate to meet the resident cat?

Is it a good idea to switch the rooms they are in every day? That would get each of them more of the other's scent, but I'm worried if that would make each also less secure about having their own territory?

Thank you for your help!
 
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calicosrspecial

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I typically look for a few things to let me know that they are ready to meet. I like to see that they don't have any negative reaction (staring, cautious walking, any negative body language) when they are near each other in a visual setting (no physical access). That they can be easily distracted by food, play or words when the other cat is near). If they have their tails straight up when they see each other across the gate etc. I can help you during the process to help interpret,  Any time they seem to feel comfortable with each other. That helps increase the odds of a successful meet.

I am not the biggest fan of meeting via a crate. But at times because of the house etc it is needed to be used. I tend to like to be at a point where they are so familiar and not afraid  that the initial no restriction (gates etc) meeting has a high probability of success. Getting them to be able to be distracted with play or food is very helpful in the initial meetings as well.

I truly believe that if the more positive interactions (and the least negative) help speed the introduction. So I always try to make every interaction as positive as possible (using food typically) even if they are short in time.

Site swapping is something I do down the road. After scent swapping. I tend to do it right before getting them together without barriers. By that time if I did my job and associated the scent of the other cat with good things and I have built their confidence through (food, play, height and love) then they shouldn't have any issues with site swapping. So at this point I would stick with the scent swapping (an old shirt with the other cat's scent on it) and associating that scent with good things for now. We want them to get to the point where they are like "yeah I know that smell and that cat is ok". When you do the site swapping you want to use food and play in the other area to help get them confident in that new area.

I typically think that cats don't get along because they see the other cat as a threat. If we get them to feel like they are safe and secure then we are a long way towards getting them to get along. I also believe a confident cat is less likely to attack and a confident cat is less likely to be attacked. So I truly believe building each cat's confidence is very important during the process.

I hope that helps a bit. Please let me know if you need any clarification and feel free to ask anything anytime. I will be here for as long as you need me.
 
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itspursonal

itspursonal

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CalicosRSpecial said:
 
I typically look for a few things to let me know that they are ready to meet. I like to see that they don't have any negative reaction (staring, cautious walking, any negative body language) when they are near each other in a visual setting (no physical access). That they can be easily distracted by food, play or words when the other cat is near). If they have their tails straight up when they see each other across the gate etc. I can help you during the process to help interpret,  Any time they seem to feel comfortable with each other. That helps increase the odds of a successful meet.

I am not the biggest fan of meeting via a crate. But at times because of the house etc it is needed to be used. I tend to like to be at a point where they are so familiar and not afraid  that the initial no restriction (gates etc) meeting has a high probability of success. Getting them to be able to be distracted with play or food is very helpful in the initial meetings as well.

I truly believe that if the more positive interactions (and the least negative) help speed the introduction. So I always try to make every interaction as positive as possible (using food typically) even if they are short in time.

Site swapping is something I do down the road. After scent swapping. I tend to do it right before getting them together without barriers. By that time if I did my job and associated the scent of the other cat with good things and I have built their confidence through (food, play, height and love) then they shouldn't have any issues with site swapping. So at this point I would stick with the scent swapping (an old shirt with the other cat's scent on it) and associating that scent with good things for now. We want them to get to the point where they are like "yeah I know that smell and that cat is ok". When you do the site swapping you want to use food and play in the other area to help get them confident in that new area.

I typically think that cats don't get along because they see the other cat as a threat. If we get them to feel like they are safe and secure then we are a long way towards getting them to get along. I also believe a confident cat is less likely to attack and a confident cat is less likely to be attacked. So I truly believe building each cat's confidence is very important during the process.

I hope that helps a bit. Please let me know if you need any clarification and feel free to ask anything anytime. I will be here for as long as you need me.
Click to expand...
Thank you so much! 

I had no idea that more confidence would mean more peace. I have a much clearer idea of how to proceed now, thanks to your clarifications regarding my specific questions. 

I think our resident cat, Coconut, is a little threatened by the new cat, as he did pounce her a few times when we prematurely introduced them. I tend to think that he was playing, as he is just 9 months old and he is constantly trilling up a storm near the door when he hears her nearby. Coconut, however, just -stares- in the direction of his voice and looks visibly tense. Hopefully, some positive association and patience will fix what damage we may have caused by rushing things.

Again, thank you for your assistance!
 
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calicosrspecial

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You are very welcome.

I have found that the resident cat typically has the tougher transition. And it is understandable. It is their territory and this other cat comes into it. Cats are territorial so any time their territory is threatened the get defensive. Until they realize the other cat is ok, doesn't want to hurt them or impact their ability to get food or pleasure. That is why we want to take it slow and associate the other cat with good things.

I think any "damage" can be repaired. I am not worried. There will be ups and downs but the process does work.

I will be here for you if you have any questions on the process and how to proceed or interpret behavior etc. I am confident you will do a great job with them. Keep up the great work.

Well done puddykat, great post!! 
 
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itspursonal

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So today, mr bean slipped out the door as I tried to enter the bedroom. He was on top of coconut before I knew it, biting the back of her neck , mounting and trying to pin her down. He was also trilling so loud as he ran out and towards her. Before I could even clap, coco pushed him off her, turned and got on her hind legs and gave him a series of rapid swats to the face before he ran away. I was so relieved that we trimmed her claws just last night.

So this behavior made me look into his medical history more closely. It turned out that he was just neutered two days before we adopted him. I'm. Sort of surprised that he was up for adoption so quickly but I guess they recover fast. I think he may still have hormones or habits from before because he was neutered at 9 months of age and after being a stray. This might explain why he is always desperate to get to our resident cat, or it could just be play. I've no idea, but I suspect he might calm down at least a little after a few weeks when those hormones decrease a little.
 
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calicosrspecial

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The boys do recover quickly and the testosterone can be in them for a little while so I am not totally surprised by what he did. I am not an expert on how long it takes but I believe in a month all the hormones are typically gone. It does sound like mating behavior.

Coco is spayed, correct?

Just take it slowly and try to build their confidence and slowly try to associate them with good things. Given what happened maybe take it a bit slower as we want those hormones to be out of him and that will make it easier to associate them in a positive way. 
 
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itspursonal

itspursonal

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CalicosRSpecial said:
The boys do recover quickly and the testosterone can be in them for a little while so I am not totally surprised by what he did. I am not an expert on how long it takes but I believe in a month all the hormones are typically gone. It does sound like mating behavior.

Coco is spayed, correct?

Just take it slowly and try to build their confidence and slowly try to associate them with good things. Given what happened maybe take it a bit slower as we want those hormones to be out of him and that will make it easier to associate them in a positive way. 
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She is, yes. Yeah, I'm actually encouraged by this revelation about his recent neutering. It means things can only get better, even if they take more time.:D

Surprisingly, coco really seems to try to interact with him. If I let them barely see each other, she will go and curiously watch. I took this picture earlier today
SL7MpGE.jpg

SL7MpGE.jpg

coconut is the one fully visible

Should I close this up? Sometimes they'll play with each other's paws for a little bit before coconut has enough and goes somewhere else.
 
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calicosrspecial

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They are both adorable!!

Yes, it does make sense.

It is great that Coco interacts with him. It is usually the resident cat that has the more difficult adjustment since it is their territory that is being infiltrated.

When they are like that (near the door with it closed or open) try to use food or treats to associate each of them with something good.  If they start getting "funny" try to distract. And just start with small amounts of time and then build from that. The more positive encounters without any incident the more it will help build their confidence and trust with each other. When they realize the other cat is not a threat and they are confident then we are in good shape.

Just take it slowly and build on any positive however small they may be.

Keep up the good work. Feel free to ask anything anytime.
 
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itspursonal

itspursonal

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CalicosRSpecial said:
 
They are both adorable!!

Yes, it does make sense.

It is great that Coco interacts with him. It is usually the resident cat that has the more difficult adjustment since it is their territory that is being infiltrated.

When they are like that (near the door with it closed or open) try to use food or treats to associate each of them with something good.  If they start getting "funny" try to distract. And just start with small amounts of time and then build from that. The more positive encounters without any incident the more it will help build their confidence and trust with each other. When they realize the other cat is not a threat and they are confident then we are in good shape.

Just take it slowly and build on any positive however small they may be.

Keep up the good work. Feel free to ask anything anytime.
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I appreciate your patience and advice. Thank you very much
 
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calicosrspecial

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You are very welcome. I am happy to help. Thank you for caring about your cats so much!! We'll get there. I am here for you as long as needed.
 
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