Help with older cats sleep schedule

addy08

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Hello, I'm new here and desperately need some advice! I've searched the Web and found things regarding excessive meowing but it never quite fits my cats situation. She has started meowing very loudly between 4 and 6 in the morning every day. It's gone one for several months and just keeps getting earlier. I'm desperate for sleep! She is 18 years old, is declawed (it was before I knew I had better options), hasn't slept with me or in my room for years and lives with a dog that's we've had for 6 years. Ive read some suggested remedies that just don't apply to our situation. I keep her food in my bathroom so the dog can't gobble it up and thought at first she was wanting in to get it. I sleep with the bedroom door shut. She is obviously wanting in my room. She does go to her food/water bowls once I let her in but its for a 10 second nibble and then she moves on. She does this as I head to the kitchen for coffee and at that point she meows like crazy until I come back in my room and sit on the bed with my coffee. (She is still roaming around at this point and isn't trying to get on the bed.) Once this routine is complete, she is perfectly content. She doesn't eat at this time so I don't feel it's a hunger issue. She usually just lays in the bedroom floor and goes back to sleep. I should point out that some cat activities have had to be altered for her. She was in a house fire as a kitten and inhaled smoke. It caused some brain damage which appears to have effected her balance, equilibrium, etc. She didn't have the use of her limbs for a couple of weeks a alter the fire but as she regained it, that seemed to be the only lingering effect. She walks, runs and jumps just fine. She does start walking at an angle at times like a drunk person would. She will for example fall off the coffee table if she tries to walk along the edge of it where most cats are acrobats. For this reason, she's never had any kind of climbing trees or toys. I mention this because I am limited to the types of things I can give her to entertain herself. She's old but is remarkably healthy. We live in a very small town and the vet can make sure she's physically ok but he is more familiar with horse and cow behavior. He can't help me with the behavioral side of things.
For the last month things have gotten out of hand. She sleeps in the living room in her own bed and our dog always sleeps on the couch. She naps in this bed in the daytime when she could be in my room if she wanted so she doesn't have an issue with the bed. The dog started softly crying/howling about a month ago in the morning after the cat would start meowing. I don't know if the dog is doing this out of annoyance towards the cat or if he's chiming in with her. If my family wasn't so sleep deprived, it would be a very comical site. My bedroom is next to the living room and the other bedrooms are upstairs. We have an open balcony above the living room so everyone upstairs is effected also. I only point this out because relocating her somewhere else other than the living room isn't an option and after this long, combined with her age, I don't think she would like the change anyway. I've tried sleeping with my door cracked open so she can come in there predawn if she wants. That hasn't worked because it's obvious that she doesn't want me to pick her up, pet her or feed her. She just wants me up and sitting on my bed with a cup of coffee even if it's 4 a.m. Could there be something I'm missing and and she's needing something else. I would appreciate any advice you can give me.
 

molly92

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How often do you "give in" and get up when she meows? If you've done it even just once in a while, she has hope that the meowing will work and will keep doing it. She'll only stop when she's convinced that there is no chance you will concede to her demands. It's not an easy solution, but waiting it out may be your best option. You have to give absolutely NO indication that her meowing is having any effect. The second she hears noise coming from your room or sees you sit up in bed, she can think that her method is starting to work, she just needs to keep at it and if she meows long enough, eventually you will get up. And the thing is, eventually you do get up at some point, so it seems to her that her persistence paid off.

Something to try is ignoring her completely and setting some kind of alarm for when you want to get up, and only get up when the alarm rings. Since this habit has been going on for a while, it might take a very long time, but eventually she will notice that no matter how hard she meows, nothing happens until that alarm goes off and she has no control over that, so she will eventually give up. If you do need to get up before the alarm for whatever reason, I'd suggest acting like she's not even there. Don't acknowledge her at all.

The dog is probably gets a little anxious about whatever the cat is so upset about, hence the whining. Cats can act very convincing that something serious is wrong when they want something badly enough! When the cat gives up the dog should too.

As you know, cats love their routine. She's just going to have to learn a new routine and once she has adjusted, the hope is she will be just as happy with the new one of waiting till the alarm goes off for her people to get up. What she really cares about is things being the same every day, which makes her feel safe and comfortable. Perhaps her past trauma has exacerbated her anxiety for when she thinks things are not going according to schedule.

I know I've said this a lot, but it might take a very long time to establish the new routine, especially because the old one is so ingrained. Perhaps as long as this one has been going on or more. You have to be more persistent than the cat, which is definitely a tall order but it can be done!
 
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