I've got a whole bunch of young cousins and a 3-year-old niece.
You know that scene in Jurassic Park, where Sam Niell, Laura Dern and Richard Attenborough are at the velociraptor cage? At first they can't see the raptors through the trees in the enclosure -- until a door slides open in the floor of the enclosure, and a mechanized platform raises a single cow, chained to the floor and completely oblivious to its imminent evisceration.
And you know how there's like a blur of activity and a cloud of dust as the raptors shred the cow into nothing, until two seconds later the last bone clinks down with the chain still attached, with blood everywhere?
That's what it's like on Christmas morning, when these kids are opening their presents. Like starving velociraptors in a cage, claws shredding wrapping paper, bows flying, cards tossed aside without a glance. Oh look, that doll you wanted! YES! A new iPad!! Hey, a pair of boots! Wow, a massive Disney princess castle that took your parents 2 hours to put together last night! OMG, three entire boxes of baseball cards! My Little Ponies!!! Whoah, a brand new Playstation 4 pro with four new games! Cool, a Barbie convertible! Hey, a pair of winter gloves you can still text with while wearing! A $150 gift card for iTunes! Whoah, Beats headphones yo! Uggs!! Is that a drone?!? No way!! Oh, I've always wanted a Nintendo 3DS! And all six Pokemon games? SWEET!!
Multiply that by like 50 and that probably does it justice.
One of my cousins was trying to get her kid to say thank you.
"What do you say? Ashley, what do you say when someone gives you a present? Ashley?"
I couldn't help myself, and cut in with: "Where's the next one?"
That earned me a death stare lol.
Don't get me wrong, I buy toys for the kids and I like buying stuff for my niece, but she has a play room at home and that place looks like a hidden pirate's cove -- but instead of mounds of gold and booty, there are piles and piles of toys, as if Scrooge McDuck decided to fill his money vault with barbies and princesses and ponies. You could practically swim in them.
Okay, I know I just painted a terrible picture of my family just there, so now for the good: Everyone in my family gets along. I'm talking about the extended family here, a good 25+ people. We're all genuinely happy to see each other. Fights are absolutely unheard of. We laugh. Everyone enjoys a drink or two, but no one ever gets drunk. The food is always amazing. We all pitch in and help, whether it's with cooking or with setting up the tables and chairs. It's always a warm holiday with people who love each other, and afterwards I'm always glad I spent time with my family.
I never appreciated that until college, when I spent a few holidays at the homes of friends and girlfriends, and saw firsthand -- and for the first time -- how the holidays go with other families. Suddenly I understood that my family is shockingly normal and we get along a lot better than some families do. That's something to be grateful for!
How are the holidays with your family? Any velociraptors in your house?
You know that scene in Jurassic Park, where Sam Niell, Laura Dern and Richard Attenborough are at the velociraptor cage? At first they can't see the raptors through the trees in the enclosure -- until a door slides open in the floor of the enclosure, and a mechanized platform raises a single cow, chained to the floor and completely oblivious to its imminent evisceration.
And you know how there's like a blur of activity and a cloud of dust as the raptors shred the cow into nothing, until two seconds later the last bone clinks down with the chain still attached, with blood everywhere?
That's what it's like on Christmas morning, when these kids are opening their presents. Like starving velociraptors in a cage, claws shredding wrapping paper, bows flying, cards tossed aside without a glance. Oh look, that doll you wanted! YES! A new iPad!! Hey, a pair of boots! Wow, a massive Disney princess castle that took your parents 2 hours to put together last night! OMG, three entire boxes of baseball cards! My Little Ponies!!! Whoah, a brand new Playstation 4 pro with four new games! Cool, a Barbie convertible! Hey, a pair of winter gloves you can still text with while wearing! A $150 gift card for iTunes! Whoah, Beats headphones yo! Uggs!! Is that a drone?!? No way!! Oh, I've always wanted a Nintendo 3DS! And all six Pokemon games? SWEET!!
Multiply that by like 50 and that probably does it justice.
One of my cousins was trying to get her kid to say thank you.
"What do you say? Ashley, what do you say when someone gives you a present? Ashley?"
I couldn't help myself, and cut in with: "Where's the next one?"
That earned me a death stare lol.
Don't get me wrong, I buy toys for the kids and I like buying stuff for my niece, but she has a play room at home and that place looks like a hidden pirate's cove -- but instead of mounds of gold and booty, there are piles and piles of toys, as if Scrooge McDuck decided to fill his money vault with barbies and princesses and ponies. You could practically swim in them.
Okay, I know I just painted a terrible picture of my family just there, so now for the good: Everyone in my family gets along. I'm talking about the extended family here, a good 25+ people. We're all genuinely happy to see each other. Fights are absolutely unheard of. We laugh. Everyone enjoys a drink or two, but no one ever gets drunk. The food is always amazing. We all pitch in and help, whether it's with cooking or with setting up the tables and chairs. It's always a warm holiday with people who love each other, and afterwards I'm always glad I spent time with my family.
I never appreciated that until college, when I spent a few holidays at the homes of friends and girlfriends, and saw firsthand -- and for the first time -- how the holidays go with other families. Suddenly I understood that my family is shockingly normal and we get along a lot better than some families do. That's something to be grateful for!
How are the holidays with your family? Any velociraptors in your house?
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