Missing my fur baby & dealing with children's grief

My sweet 3 legged boy "Fur" crossed the angel bridge on Monday, after 12 years with me. He was full of life until the end, but hid his symptoms so well. He took a steep quick decline and one week after being checked out at the vet and deemed healthy, passed away in my arms. One thing I didn't expect or prepare for, was my sons reaction to his death. My son is 2, and though he knew and loved Fur, I didn't expect him to understand. When I brought Fur's ashes home, I explained to my son that Fur had died, and he is in this urn. He has been heart breakingly attached to the urn since then. He wakes up in the morning and immediately asks for "fur box" and gives it a hug. This evening when we came home, he ran straight to Furs bed, laid down and started crying. I asked what he was doing and he said "missing fur". I don't know what to do to make him feel better, and it has made the loss so much harder, knowing how sad my son is as well. Not sure where to go from here.

Hi. I am so sorry for your loss. My cat is very sick now, and I am approaching a similar situation. I am so sorry for your son. I do not have any experience with children dealing with the loss of pets, but I think the best you can do is just give him lots of love and tell him that your kitty is safe now and won't ever be sick or in pain again. It is the worst thing in the world, and I've been through it a few times. I understand that you are both (and perhaps other family members, too) feeling so much hurt, and it is hard not seeing your cute little fur baby around as you are used to seeing him/her. With my other cats, and with my cat who is sick now, I try to tell myself I wouldn't want them to be suffering. 

I know I will always keep the memories of my babies, and I will never, ever forget them. I am sure it is the same for you.

Be well, and my condolences go to you.

Jen

 

I'm so sorry to hear that your sweet Fur. I've no doubt that being in your arms as he made his journey across the Rainbow Bridge was an amazing comfort to Fur. You gave Fur a life filled with love and happiness. I can only imagine that trying to ease your sons grief must compound your own grief. I'm wondering if reading the poem about the Rainbow Bridge to your son might help the both of you:

http://rainbowsbridge.com/Poem.htm

Again, my condolences to you for loss. Fur is at peace and I hope you are able to find some peace as well.

[emoji]128149[/emoji]RIP sweet Fur[emoji]128149[/emoji]

jenmeow said:

Hi. I am so sorry for your loss. My cat is very sick now, and I am approaching a similar situation.
Jen
 

Click to expand...

J jenmeow I'm so so sorry to hear that your baby is really sick...my heart goes out to you [emoji]10084[/emoji]️️[emoji]10084[/emoji]️️[emoji]10084[/emoji]️️

@thull08  That is so heartbreaking for so many reasons. I wish I could help with advice but never had to deal with the situation you are in. I am so sorry for your loss of Fur.

Fur you are loved, and will always be in the hearts of the people that your life touched . RIP sweet boy   

@thull08   Ask your son to help you make a memory book of / for Fur. This can be a read-to-me story to help him remember the happier times so your son (and you) can heal from Fur's loss.

He can tell you two or three happy things he remembers about your cat for you to write down. See if he can draw a picture or two. Include a couple of photographs of Fur.

And find a beautiful picture of a rainbow. Print out the Rainbow Bridge and include it.

Just this side of Heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge. When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing: they each miss someone very special, someone who was left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; his eager body begins to quiver. Suddenly, he breaks from the group, flying over the green grass, faster and faster. You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into those trusting eyes, so long gone from your life, but never absent from your heart.
Then you cross the Rainbow Bridge together...

  Condolences on your sad loss. How touching that your son was so devoted to Fur. I loved Catapault's suggestions of drawing pictures and looking at photographs. I also recommend looking online at similar looking cats on Petfinders, or one of those sites (who knows but you may find a special kitty to fill that "cat-shaped" hole in your heart). My daughter's cat lived to be 18yo (PTS this evening) so if you get your son another young cat, conceivably, he would have that feline's companionship, through, God willing, high school years.

When my Chrissy died, my husband had a picture of her framed with the Rainbow Bridge inserted onto the picture. It brings me great comfort to see it now beside our bed, your little son might like to have a picture of his Furbaby to keep nearby. He is too young to understand the concept of death, to him Fur has gone away and he misses him. The only thing you can do is explain that Fur had to leave, kitties don't live as long as people and he went on a journey along a new road. But that he will always be nearby even though you can't see him, because he is free now to be anywhere he wants. He will always be around, the love your son feels for him will let Fur hear him and send his love to him too. That even though he won't be in our home anymore, he will always be a part of us because he lives on in our memories and our hearts.You might want to bring him to a shelter to play with the kittens, it may distract him. Or have him donate cat food to a  food pantry to help others, it will bring positive feelings to a sad heart. My heart goes out to you, I'll pray for you all, take care......RIP beautiful Fur, you left behind two hearts that will miss you so very much. Let your pure light shine down on them to bring them comfort, you will be held forever in those loving hearts!

Thank you all for your sweet words, I will try making some kind of memorial to Fur with my son and hopefully that will bring him some peace. Here is my son watching tv with our Fur's urn

So sorry for your loss, it is very difficult to lose our little furry creatures, and your son and his love and attachment is heartwarming but sad at the same time. I would follow the advice of the others here, it sounds like a good idea, and in due time when you are ready please consider taking in another one in need and giving it a great home too.

God Bless.....