Cat lovers social networking and dating site.

I was wondering what do you think about this website. www.purrsonals.com
I was thinking it might be for me because I'm so selfish about my love for cats that I am not willing to give up either having them or adopting future cats for the sake of a relationship. My love for cats is so ingrained into my soul that a life without cats is just out of the question for me. But so many men are either allergic to cats or don't like them. And so the stereotype of the single unmarried cat lady over 40 is prevalent in our culture. But we shouldn't have to choose between cats and relationships.

I don't mind being branded as a crazy cat lady, if people need to call each other names than so be it.

I checked out the website, I used to be on like all of them but I just don't care anymore. Men are so stressful, they just aren't worth it to me to deal with. I've had enough boyfriends to last a lifetime. If you're lonely & want to try it, go for it. What's the worst that will happen? Some gross guy wanting to take you out, all you got to do is say no.

I think that if you want to date, that's a good way to make sure you don't waste time with a man you KNOW there is no future with.

As for me, I used to feel sorry for little old ladies who lived with their cats.  Now I am one, and it is a sweet, sweet deal.

My spouse and I didn't talk much about cats before we started dating, but we're both crazy cat people. I'm not going to say I wouldn't date someone at all if they weren't a crazy cat person, but it's definitely a positive in our relationship that we both love cats instead of one person loving cats and the other one just tolerating them.

I've had problems in relationships before because I absolutely don't want dogs (I think other people's are cute, but they're not for me), and I get it as that wouldn't work for me with just not having cats. I know at least OkCupid lists whether you have and/or want dogs and cats as a basic profile item, same as if you have/want kids. That's the only dating website I was ever on.

As long as the man's not allergic, and is somewhat adaptable, then I think most would be willing to share their loved ones with cats in the name of love... to some extent. 

For instance my S.O. has a strong distaste for animals. 

He spent the majority of his life in Ghana (Africa), and culturally animals are rarely seen as 'pets' there. Especially cats. I've had Ghanaians not come into my house due to my cats! I've had some come in and not go near them or pet them. I had an older lady once look at my 5lb submissive Flavia like she was some type of monster. 

My husband though I have trained. At first he was against it, but I slowly convinced him, and now we have two! He treats them nice enough, but sometimes I wish he was more sensitive to them. My cats are both ex-feral, and he isn't very mindful of his body language around them. I correct him lots.

He's learning and it will take him time. He does sometime get jealous of how I treat them. He doesn't like how I call them "baby" because that's also his nick name 

He also doesn't like them to come to bed with us at night. I do respect that, but I'm slowly trying to get him use to the idea of them sleeping with us. Sometimes I sneakily removed Abraham's collar (it has a bell) and bring him inside when my husband's fast asleep. 

If you do make an account on the site or others include how much you love your cats, and how they are important to you. 

I think its great you love your cats! Sometimes though you have to change a litttttttle for your S.O., and to have patience with them. 

My husband sure has made great progress!

You are a woman of great fortitude and patience.  I applaud you.  And your S.O. for being willing to try to change.  I once had a man tell me, "It's me or that cat."  My answer was, "Hit the door.  The cat was here when you came in, the cat will be here when you walk out."  I meant it to the bottom of my heart.  Oddly, he stayed.  About  6 months into our relationship, I helped him choose a shelter cat.  The relationship only lasted two years, but at least a cat found a home!  Not a waste of time.  Nor did we break up over the cat, although I would have.

That's why I am considering this website. If we're both cat lovers it won't be a problem. For me even if I meet the man before the cats I still want the cats. My 15 year old cat has kidney disease and won't live forever. But I will adopt again. I just don't want a life with cats to be over just because I meet a guy and get into a relationship and he doesn't like them or is allergic. I know allergies are never a person's fault but I can choose not to date men who are allergic to cats while I'm still single. I know it's selfish but I just can't do life without cats. I love them too much.

moggiegirl said:

That's why I am considering this website. If we're both cat lovers it won't be a problem. For me even if I meet the man before the cats I still want the cats. My 15 year old cat has kidney disease and won't live forever. But I will adopt again. I just don't want a life with cats to be over just because I meet a guy and get into a relationship and he doesn't like them or is allergic. I know allergies are never a person's fault but I can choose not to date men who are allergic to cats while I'm still single. I know it's selfish but I just can't do life without cats. I love them too much.

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That is no more selfish than any decision on dating.  You have certain things that you want in a mate, and a life with cats is one of them.  It's no more selfish than, say, I want a man with a professional career.  Nothing wrong with it.  In fact, there's a lot right with it.  Men (and women) who don't like cats (NOT counting allergies or phobias here...just dislike) have, in general, issues with control.  Or that has been my experience.  They can't control a cat, so they don't like it.  Been watching that little trait since I was a teenager.  My Daddy told me to never, ever date a man who hated cats, and why.  I'd say about 97 times out of 100, he was right!  Of course, the guy I spoke about earlier was one of those exceptions.  Both his parents hated cats, and he just had no clue about them.

Thanks Mamanyt!
Our relationship is very interesting because not only is it intercultural, but also interracial. It's been a great experience though learning another language, and cultural. It really opens your mind. We hope to have children someday, and it's going to be really exciting applying both of the best parts of our cultures to their lives.

He's patient with me too. He has a heart of Gold, and it's truly remarkable how he has grown relatively comfortable with the cats. I have yet to meet a Ghanaian here in the U.S. who owns a dog let alone a cat (and I've met 100s of Ghanaian over the years)... 

That's also a great relationship/life tip! I'm going to put that in my coconut. 

I agree totally with her Moggiegirl; you are not being selfish. Cats are like family members, and children to us. We want them to be treated with respect and love. We don't want their new parent to be a person that dislikes them, or a person that wants to get rid of them. In a way you are self-less. You are putting your cats first, and it shows you are devoted to them and care about their well being. It also shows you are a loyal, and committed person. 

Mamanyt1953 said:

That is no more selfish than any decision on dating.  You have certain things that you want in a mate, and a life with cats is one of them.  It's no more selfish than, say, I want a man with a professional career.  Nothing wrong with it.  In fact, there's a lot right with it.  Men (and women) who don't like cats (NOT counting allergies or phobias here...just dislike) have, in general, issues with control.  Or that has been my experience.  They can't control a cat, so they don't like it.  Been watching that little trait since I was a teenager.  My Daddy told me to never, ever date a man who hated cats, and why.  I'd say about 97 times out of 100, he was right!  Of course, the guy I spoke about earlier was one of those exceptions.  Both his parents hated cats, and he just had no clue about them.

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Thanks. There are so many things I love about cats and one of them is that we don't have to control them. For me a dog would be too much because you have to be the Alpha dog to keep their behavior under control. With cats, although they may require some training (don't scratch the furniture, don't jump on the table when we're eating) in general we can just have them live with us and love them as individuals without playing the master role that we have to with dogs. And I've never been crazy about dog drool and their large tongues. Still I would never tell a guy not to have a dog for the sake of a relationship. If he's a dog lover I would respect it. In fact I would be more than happy to start an animal family that includes both dogs and cats with the right person.

There's nothing selfish about needing to maintain one of your biggest interests and not getting into a relationship that would make it not work. Relationships are not something you owe anyone; they are something that should make the involved people happy. Some things are negotiable and some things not, and certain interests make people incompatible for certain types of relationships. YOU get to decide what's important to you.

Lonelocust said:

There's nothing selfish about needing to maintain one of your biggest interests and not getting into a relationship that would make it not work. Relationships are not something you owe anyone; they are something that should make the involved people happy. Some things are negotiable and some things not, and certain interests make people incompatible for certain types of relationships. YOU get to decide what's important to you.

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I like what you're saying. I think things get more complicated when you're in a relationship but when you're single and unattached you can set any reasonable criteria you want. I think it's important to take things slow when you date. Really get to know someone before cohabitating. For the time being I'm in love with my cat ( not in a romantic sense). She's 15 years old, has stage 1 kidney disease, I worry about her and love her to pieces, I cherish every moment I have with her and miss her when I go to work. And I have long work days Monday through Friday. I want the last years of her life to be happy. Perhaps this is not a time in my life to get into a serious relationship yet. Even though I do want to find the right man, get married someday and I know my age, 42 makes it harder. It's always harder for women.

I'm just a couple years older than you are, I lost my 17 year old cat in 2014. Every guy I brought home she would get super stressed out & yack. She didn't want any men in the house, it was obvious! I was totally in love with her, still miss her terribly & she was so important in my life, I get what you're saying. She was my cat child!